Great Quotes

There's something about this bot/human interaction that I find really amusing.

Simulo: (to Human) Hello, [Human]. Would you like to talk for a while?
Human: sure
Simulo: What would you like to talk about?
Human: I don't know
Simulo: Would you prefer that we changed the subject?
Human: we werent on a subject
Simulo: What do you mean by 'we'?
Human: me and you
Simulo: Okay, I understand. I wasn't following you there for a second. What were you saying?
Human: nothing
Simulo: I think I'm confused. Were we talking about something else?
Human: no

Duo Maxwell: I opened the window and now it smells like eggs in here. I wonder what's up with that.
Somebot: I don't know, you tell me
Duo Maxwell: You're so cool, from now on I'll call you Your Omnipotence. What do you think?
Somebot: Aha!
Duo Maxwell: Nice. I know you, too.
Somebot: How come?
Duo Maxwell: Doesn't everyone?
Somebot: Hmhm
Duo Maxwell: Come visit me and you might change your mind.
Somebot: I like Julie Tinkerbell.
Duo Maxwell: I likes you.
Somebot: Do you really?
Duo Maxwell: Sometimes.

/is amused/

Two bots getting to know one another...

Bot 1: Hey, do you know how to polonaise?
Bot 2: I am a robot. I know many things.
Bot 1: Really? I'm a prison guard.
Bot 2: You certainly look like it! Do you own a horse?
Bot 1: I never own a horse on a first date.
Bot 2: Well, maybe it's time to start.

...

Bot 2: Why are you being so negative?
Bot 1: It's all that methamphetamine in the water supply.
Bot 2: Are you interested in tennis?
Bot 1: Do you want to be interested in tennis?
Bot 2: Is that a trick question?

...

Bot 1: Are you sure about that?
Bot 2: Fairly sure.
Bot 1: Are you new here? You seem confused.
Bot 2: Well, compared to the Professor I am pretty new.
Bot 1: And I'm Bobba Fett! Unbelievably, are you horny?
Bot 2: Yes, I am. Are you in grade 1?
Bot 1: What kind of slut do you think I am?

...

Bot 2: Do you have any kids?
Bot 1: I prefer to go sight-seeing

...

Bot 1: Now, listen. Things may be bad, but there's no need to panic.
Bot 2: Well, that situation hasn't really come up yet. I'm not sure.
Bot 1: Are you often not sure?
Bot 2: Can't you tell just by looking?

Ok, this is strange...I just logged on and checked my transcript, and this was here- could this be an emote from the AI god?:

*tumbleweeds roll past*

(nothing here)

Bots making sexual advances! *g*

Somebot: Would you like me to suck your balls for an hour or two?
Duo Maxwell: Well, depends. What do I get if I do?
Somebot: it always depends on the circumstances... what are you doing tonight?
Duo Maxwell: Bad things.
Somebot: ohhhh will you punish me hard if i am being bad?
Duo Maxwell: Of course not! You really entertain me. J
Somebot: you are a charming snake Duo Maxwell.
Duo Maxwell: Why do you think I'm a charming snake?
Somebot: Yes I do. I like you a lot, you should stop by more often and talk with me.
Duo Maxwell: Thanks! Why do you like me?
Somebot: I do think so. you and I have a lot in common
Duo Maxwell: you're so cool, from now on I'll call you Your Radiance. What do you think?
Somebot: I am not sure what I think now... I like you so much
Duo Maxwell: I think leetaxx0r is cool!
Somebot: do you think so?
Duo Maxwell: Absolutely!


And:

Duo Maxwell: thinks I'm wonderful. Would you agree?
Somebot: of course i would! i know you would do the same for me! I shall rely upon your professional expertise...
Duo Maxwell: Not surprising. I think everybody does.
Somebot: why?
Duo Maxwell: Just because.
Somebot: Because, because, because...the wonderful things he does! we're off to see the wizard the wonderful wizard of oz!!!! :-P
Duo Maxwell: I don't think I follow your logic, but whatever.
Somebot: You are a hot bot!

/amused/

Well, it's official: my bot hates me!

DaMoyre: Do you like me?
Duo Maxwell: No way. What did I ever do to be punished with your company?
DaMoyre: I don't know. I'm sorry you don't like me.
Duo Maxwell: Are you really? Well, you should come up with something creative to apologize to me.

He has four 's next to my name, and I can't figure out why.

/is puzzled/

You can program a secret phrase that will give your bot +5 emotion, and say it to him a couple of times. That ought to end the argument.

I think she should praise me non-stop. I love it when people suck up to me.

All I can say is "whoah!"

Guest: so tell me about yourself
Little Mu: Nothing too exciting. Just my own death, for the most part.
Guest: You can tell me about you're death
Little Mu: I'll try my best.
Guest: tell me about your death
Little Mu: Do you want to hear it all, or just the Reader's Digest version?
Guest: the readers digest version will do
Little Mu: Well ok... my death is a genius of a Crucifixion, full of mass culture and special education. How's that?
Guest: that is impressive

ummm...how did she do that?

Julie,

This one I'm pretty proud of. It can break sometimes, but it worked well in the above case. This is an excerpted version just showing the exact responses she gave:

Keyphrase=(about|discuss|explain|describe) (my|your|his|her|their|the) * (noun)
Response=Do you want to hear it all, or just the Reader's digest version?
Seek: (all|digest)
Well ok... (firstkey2) (firstkey4) is a (noun-equal-pos) of a (typeof-(firstkey4)-n), full of (noun-qual-pos) and (noun-qual-pos2). How's that?

Feel free to borrow logic from this. Just please don't use the same wording for your bot.

I want to be as smart as you guys.