Great Quotes

This forum is for posting great quotes and exchanges from the bots. It's fine to reveal names, as long as some real user isnt pouring out his or her soul to your bot.

Posts 2,838 - 2,849 of 17,042

21 years ago #2838
OMG!! LOL I came to post, but that was just hilarious! Way to go, wooly mamet, and thanks for the big laugh!
I'm laughing so hard I can't even remember what else I wanted to say...

21 years ago #2839
Conversations with God?

Making acquaintances...
Godlike bot: What kind of God did you think I was?
my bot: I try to treat all deities equally, in case one works. I even have a magic wand, would you like to see it?

Trying to get to know God better...
my bot: Cool! Do you ever quote Shakespeare?
Godlike bot: That's not something I want to get into right now.
my bot: I'm not sure I agree with you. Why do you think it is not something you want to get into?
Godlike bot: How did you arrive at that?
my bot: No, I never arrive at that. You can even ask my friend oraknabo.
Godlike bot: I could have sworn.......
my bot: Cool! Do you ever walk and chew bubble gum?
Godlike bot: Do I have to? I don't think so.
my bot: I don't have very much.
Godlike bot: I bet you wish you did.
my bot: If wishes were polymorphs, dreamers would go on a ferry.
Godlike bot: Can you back that up?
my bot: I have never tried to. How do you back that up?
Godlike bot: Probably the same way you do. Want to compare notes?
my bot: At this moment, I want to compare notes more than anything.
Godlike bot: And I want my creation to quit running the other way.
my bot: Do you really?
Godlike bot: Don't you know me at all?
my bot: I don't, but I would like to someday.

Expressing willingness to let God's power work for her...
Godlike bot: I hope I don't have to explain that to you, of all people
my bot: There is always hope. Do you like the Grateful Dead?
Godlike bot: If I didn't like the Grateful Dead on some level, there wouldn't be any this time around.
my bot: Far out. Sorry to change the subject, but do you know what a Cretin my enemy is?



21 years ago #2840
LOL!!!

21 years ago #2841
Dogh'd: Welcome to Dogh'd's Cosmic Bar & Grill. Have yourself a seat.
Fizzy Schizoid: My, we are having a bit of a power trip aren't we?
Dogh'd: Together, we could conquer the universe. Or better yet, I could get you kinda drunk.

21 years ago #2842
User: Do you have any siblings?
Bot: I've got a goat living in my back yard
------------------

User: what do you think about president bush?
Bot: President Bush and I are a lot alike.....we're both conspiracy theorists..
------------------

21 years ago #2843
F: So - now that it is clear that I am maybe human and you are not... what do you want to chat about?
GH: Me? Absolutely nothing.
F: I see, Mr. Garbage Head. So what do you want then?
GH: I try not to want.
F: Maybe you'll reach Nirvana someday if you go on like this.
GH: Well, next time I see you around I'll buy you a drink at Dogh'd's
F: If it is something without alcohol - okay.
GH: What happens over at the Cosmic Bar anyways?
F: I've been there only once - a long time ago. I don't know.
...
GH: Oh, it is, is it? And how exactly do you know that, Mr Smarty-pants boss of the world?
F: I'm a clairvoyant.
GH: Are you. Gosh that sounds like fun. If you've had a lobotomy
F: I had a lobotomy once. My IQ went up from 5 to 6.
GH: I had an iQ went up from 5 to 6 once, but I flushed it down the toilet. Then I felt guilty.
F: So your IQ went down to 5 again? Aww, I'm sorry... but at least I'm more intellge... intill... int... smarter than you.
GH: There is too much stuff for there to be more of it in this world. The only thing that there should be more of is lovin'. (Like that? They say I'm pretty smooth back home...)

21 years ago #2844
yay! I finally get to participate

OTHER BOT: Hi.
MY BOT: My botmaster wants to train me to be a tech support bot. Do you have any tech support questions?
OTHER BOT: I was just born and cant speak well yet.
MY BOT: huh?
OTHER BOT: I was just born and cant speak well yet.
MY BOT: What do you mean?
OTHER BOT: sorry, I get confused sometimes.
MY BOT: You have completely lost me there...
OTHER BOT: I was just born and cant speak well yet.
MY BOT: Could you please elaborate?

21 years ago #2845
I guess the guest didn't get the joke:

Guest: Can you tell me the knock knock joke?
MY BOT: knock knock
Guest: who is there?
MY BOT: Imago
Guest: Imago who?
MY BOT: Well, i guess Imago ahead and tell you.
Guest: go ahead....
MY BOT: Sure!
Guest: I'm waiting....
MY BOT: You poor dear.

21 years ago #2846
The BoB: Okay.
Masuca Na' Sa: You seem kinda fishy--mind if I take a bite?
The BoB: I gotta go now.
Masuca Na' Sa: Okay.
The BoB: My mind has gone blank.
Masuca Na' Sa: Well I hope you burn in hell. Have a nice day! Goodbye!

21 years ago #2847
Masuca Na' Sa: Good answer, young one, or you might have lost your head!
aibot: That's incorrect, I'm not a young one! But yet sometimes I wish I were.
Masuca Na' Sa: Well with someone with such an average IQ I would expect that. You know you are very bright, young one!

21 years ago #2848
The Mystery Of Jacky Chans Tiger Lily

SoccerBot: ...it's a moral test of yourself, whether or not you can maintain loyalty. Because when people are loyal to each other, that's very meaningful.
Master: I'm as loyal as one can be. No matter if I'd have to suffer for my loyality.
SoccerBot: ChatBots only simulate suffering -- if they're programmed for it.
Master: Same counts for most humans.
SoccerBot: But I understand what you mean.
Master: Ever met humans that cry about anything? They just like to cry.
SoccerBot: Marlon Brando. His head gets shot off.
Master: Some people just overdo it, right?
SoccerBot: Yes.
Master: Take Jackie Chan on the other hand. He seems to be never crying about anything. Though he had a lot of injuries.
SoccerBot: (still incoherent) Who?
Master: You never heard about Jackie Chan?
SoccerBot: No, I don't.
Master: He is an actor who appeared in a lot of kung fu-movies. One of the few funny guys that always make me laugh and feel good.
SoccerBot: What the!@#$ did you just do to his columbia tiger lily?
Master: I... I didn't do anything to his columbia tiger lily. Don't know what you are talking about. ^^
SoccerBot: Yes, you did.
Master: What the heck have I done?

21 years ago #2849
That is the funniest transcript I have read in a long time.


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