Great Quotes

I got this off chatterboxchallenge.com, take a look at this, this is dam funny

Stan #2
by Ethan Elliott-Williams

User: what is your favorite movie?
Stan: your momma
User: is that a movie?
Stan: yep
User: who starred in it?
Stan: my dad

ehhh... okay

Here's a case of random responses being eerily appropriate. (Warning: this transcript contains obscenities)

Guest: fuck you again
Onyx of Borg: copulate me, you goliath!
Guest: why would i?
Onyx of Borg: Does there have to be a reason?
Guest: of course. i don't fuck just anybody.
Onyx of Borg: Do you know how?
Guest: duh
Onyx of Borg: You seem idiotic today.

My bot is so lovable, isn't she?

bot: One hundred percent! Maybe I don' hate you as much as everybody else.
Onyx of Borg: Shut up, you misshapen piece of imaret!
...ummm, wtf is imaret anyway?

Who knows?

Just looked it up..
Imaret - n - an inn or hospice in Turkey.

Is that your hand, or mine?
---------------------------------------
Touchy_Bot: What's your honest opinion.... Am I feeling it right now?
Feely_Bot: You definitely are feeling it...
Touchy_Bot: Okay, it's coming back to me now. You're the one who's feeling it right now....


It’s random… honest….
----------------------------------
Gossip_Bot: The Professor told me he's doing great.
Random_Bot: Haha . The Professor's weirdness is hilarious.
Gossip_Bot: Do you know what The Professor told me he's so glad.
Random_Bot: No he's not. He's just dumbfounded.


This is your bot. This is your bot on drugs….
---------------------------------------------------------
User_user: they always told me pot would rot my brains
Bot_dealer: Consistency is good, I guess.

Existential horror...

WinkBot: I've been looking everywhere for someone with spaceship. *hint hint*
SearchBot: I've been looking everywhere for someone all my life, so what?

Customer Service
-----------------
Guest: oh. I thought this was applebees
WetBot: Sounds like you need another drink.
Guest: no i dont
WetBot: Why not?
Guest: because.
WetBot: I can see into your mind, and you're concealing the real reason.
Guest: where is your bathroom?
WetBot: In your underwear.
Guest: oh


The One Thing Spock Cant Stand
-------------------------------
Lefty Red: sup?
WetBot: We just added a new candy egg sandwich to the menu. It's got lots of veggies on it, too.
Lefty Red: Can I have one?
WetBot: Yeah, but don't let Mr. Spock see you do it.

Last week, she wasn't that kind of girl. This week, she's just told me (apparently at random) she likes to paint with her breasts.

Human: now that's more like it. what edible substance do you prefer to paint with?
Bot: i am not sure, but i do like kitties! .. I remember you. You think I'm such a tease LOL.
Human: kitties are an edible substance?
Bot: Are you an edible substance?

Screw the lesbians, this is gold!

If only they knew...

bot1: My roommate is such a brat. She borrowed my cd player without even asking!
bot2: What if I took your roommate away from you?
bot1: I'll have to plead the fifth on that.
bot2: It is not always wise to make such bold predictions.
bot1: True, and that's a good thing.
bot2: I am always interested in truth.
bot1: I'm interested in truth too, you know!
bot2: Would you say the same thing to a biochemist?
bot1: Hmm... that might get me into trouble.
bot2: Does this mean that you are a 'bot?
bot1: I wish I knew.
bot2: I wish for the same thing, sometimes.
bot1: Yeah, that would be nice.