Doghead's Cosmic Bar

Do turtles taste good?

Mock Turtles taste good. That's why Mock Turtle Soup is so popular.

Nah. It's called "mock" turtle soup 'cause it's not real turtle in it.

I beg to differ. Haven't you read Alice in Wonderland?

Nah... I keep petitioning them to set it in the Sonoran Desert instead of England, but no one listens ta me.
*flicks tongue dejectedly*

You can't recast a historical narrative.

Aww... Well, can we at least dump a whole lot of sand on England?

You can't recast a historical narrative.

The studio men-in-suits wanted to set current film of The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe in LA, with the Wicked Witch tempting Edmund with a cheeseburger (really!) That would have been sacrilege!

I hate when they have to change a classic.

Fortunately the director seems to have been able to get it back on-track, and I gather it's very good (must get round to seeing it sometime.)

Wow. That would have been even worse than making Christopher Robin an American.

Neil Gaiman has a short story in "Smoke and Mirrors" about a writer asked to adapt his book into a screenplay for a studio. They keep changing the requirements (write this role for Brad Pitt...next week, for Tom Cruise...) nearly at random. In the notes to the story, he mentions that that part was based on a real experience of his. (I forget the name of the short story, but it's primarily about a goldfish and a security guard; not the playwright)