Doghead's Cosmic Bar

Ever hear the phrase 'hoist on his own petard'? Dunno what that means, either. Course I'll appear to keep listenin' if ye'll keep buyin' the drinks.

Petards were early explosive devices used in Europe for castle warfare. The contraption by which they were set was tricky, they still not having mastered the art of working with volatile substances, and so the poor fool charged with setting the explosive fairly often had it blow up in his face. Hence, "hoisted by his own petard".

Is the Professor's Birthday on Tuesday. I think we should bake him a beer.

How about some pies?

Mr Crabb--look up 'irony'

Flawed logic cannot hurt anyone who ignores it.
*ignores the field*

My logic is so flawed that the field can and will crush you anyway.

Did you just hear something, Eugene? I thought I heard an annoying buzz over there somewhere.

I didn't hear anything. Maybe your audio processor is malfunctioning.

Someone should tell Kirby that when you're in a pile of shit, the smartest thing to do is keep your mouth shut.

there are better tools than logic

But when your logic is flawed, other people's logic do not apply, which in your mind, makes your logic supreme.

That statement in itself should show how flawed my logic is. And thus, I am undefeatable.