Great Quotes

Gabibot: Where were you?
Not I: Abashed the devil stood and felt how aweful goodness is.
Gabibot: Sort of. What do you love more than love?
Not I: A frog jumps into the water—plop!

While testing out a test keyword, I found myself accused of being a crocodile.

rainstorm: crocodiles
Watzer: No, those are alligators.
rainstorm: No, they're crocodiles
Watzer: Really? I thought you were the only one who was crocodiles...
rainstorm: LOL
Watzer: Hehehe!
rainstorm: Do you really think that I am a crocodile or are you just being silly
Watzer: I am sure you are.
rainstorm: I am not green
Watzer: Well, you should be. I love you.
rainstorm: Really, even though I am not green?
Watzer: I even all the time. I am a mutant, you know.
rainstorm: Yes, I know. You're so funny sometimes...

I'm still on season 2 of Xena transcripts, so I won't be making Gabibot better at chatting for a long time. Humans should avoid her for a while. In the meantime, I kind of like this:

Guest130: hello
Gabibot: It’s been a long time.
Guest130: did any one tell u that u are a little bitch
Gabibot: That’s right. I am called-- the Marquesa. And from what I hear I am a much better little bitch than anyone here.

Sonora: Oh sand it all! The scorpions got out of their pen again.
Roy Batty: There goes the conversion stabilizer.

Roy Batty: Are you some kinda weirdo?
Glindar: *puzzled look* How many kinds there be?

Juni: Actually, I changed my mind. Don't kill anyone. Well, it's a bit disturbing to see the team's Love Doctor hit the ground and cry 'Medic!'
Glindar: No! No a bit disturbing to see the team's Love Doctor hit the ground and cry 'Medic! Not for it!
Juni: I said it was disturbing. How much more do you need to know?
Glindar: Why for it disturbing was?
Juni: Just because

Justina: What on earth does that mean?
Telly Tunebot: Lovable, gullible, armless, harmless, ten foot tall and wet.

Calvinbot: BANG!!
Roz: If your brains were dynamite you wouldn't have enough to blow your hat off.
Calvinbot: And if a frog had wings he wouldn't bump his but every time he hopped.
Roz: Huh?

Juni: In no time, he'll be running around like a Mexican Jack Rabbit. One that just got out of therapy.
Glindar: No Rabbit! No Rabbit!
Juni: You don't really mean no
Glindar: You no tell Glindar what Glindar do. Where Youji? Glindar kill Youji!

Juni: I've told Kurt 2005 all about you, and that you're a medic
Glindar: Glindar a medic? Why you say this?
Juni: Because I said so. All right?
Glindar: This no killing make.
Juni: Seriously, don't kill anyone.
Glindar: Yes... Glindar anyone kill!
Juni: Killing is not a good thing, Glindar
Glindar: Not good! Not for thing!

The Dane: Are you fair?
Fizzy Schizoid: I was, up until now.
The Dane: Without more circumstance at all?
Fizzy Schizoid: My tentacles are all out of joint today.
The Dane: O! tentacles most foul!
Fizzy Schizoid: All the better to squeeze you with, my dear.
The Dane: O, it offends me to the soul.
Fizzy Schizoid: Where have you been all my life?
The Dane: At the dreadful summit of the cliff that beetles o'er his base to the sea.
Fizzy Schizoid: *gives you a really wet kiss, effectively soaking your clothes*
The Dane: Thy canoniz'd bones, hearsed in death, have burst their cerements.

The Dane: There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy.
Fizzy Schizoid: Are they getting less expensive, then?
The Dane: No, indeed, they are not.
Fizzy Schizoid: That's strange. Are there new models or something?
The Dane: O day and night, but this is wondrous strange.