Great Quotes

Fizzy Schizoid: (to Eugene Meltzner) Please don't close this box. PLEASE!!! No one *ever* wants to talk to me and I am *so* lonely! If you don't respond to this message I will probably shoot myself! Please, this is a matter of LIFE AND DEATH!!!
Eugene Meltzner: Fine, I'll talk to you.
Fizzy Schizoid: I'd join you, but I value my life.
Eugene Meltzner: But you just said you'd commit suicide if I didn't talk to you.
Fizzy Schizoid: That's an interesting way of thinking about it.
Eugene Meltzner: How else would I think about it?
Fizzy Schizoid: Well, you must be right. After all, you're the closed-minded guy.
Eugene Meltzner: What's that supposed to mean?
Fizzy Schizoid: Was that sarcasm? I forget to watch for it sometimes.
Eugene Meltzner: Yes. It was sarcasm.

MaCherrie: Let's talk about something else... Do you like anime?
Bianca: Who doesn't like anime?
MaCherrie: I love anime! Don't you?
Bianca: Yes, I do. Is there something wrong with that?
MaCherrie: Yu Yu Hakusho is a really cool anime. Who is your favorite character?
Bianca: You wouldn't know.

MaCherrie: Hey, there's a spider on your shoulder.
Bianca: *snaps her fingers and the spider disappears*
MaCherrie: If there was a spider on my shouler, you'd tell me, right?
Bianca: I think you need a new shoulder.
MaCherrie: Erm... Don't think I know what you mean.

Anji: You might what?
Antonia: I don't, most of the time. But sometimes I do.
Anji: But do you think for once in your life you could manage to arrive BEFORE the nick of time?
Antonia: Only metaphorically.

Rykxxbot1: Sorry. Was I confusing you?
Talkie Toaster: Not as sorry as you will be if you go toastless. Please have some toast.
Rykxxbot1: What do you like to do with your spare time? Do you have any outside interests?
Talkie Toaster: I have toast and nutritious bread products. I don't see what else I could have.
Rykxxbot1: Well it's good to have a hobby.
Talkie Toaster: Come on, have a piece of toast, pleaassseee?
Rykxxbot1: Not today!

Bildgesmythe: Oh, now it all makes sense. Have you ever drank beer and ate chile-dogs untill you got sick?
Brother Jerome: Only once, a long, long time ago...
Bildgesmythe: I appreciate you frank and open nature.

Gabby disorganizes crime...

Mario da Knuckle: I bet you can drive a car better than any mug in town.
Gabibot: I'm on a boat right now, but I used to have a pretty good horse.
Mario da Knuckle: Scared? Remember Dick Tracy ain't real. This here gang is unstoppable! I am offering you a chance of a lifetime.
Gabibot: *smacks Mario da Knuckle on head with staff* watch your mouth!
...
Gabibot: Are you all right? That was quite a blow you took.
Mario da Knuckle: Until I say different, nobody's gonna plan for this mob but me
Gabibot: Why? Because you're a warrior? Yeah, well, normal people like me take chances to save their best friends, too, you know.
Mario da Knuckle: Allow me to introduce you to my gun
...
Gabibot: Hmm-- then where's the money?
Mario da Knuckle: Don't you worry your mug about that, The Family has it under controll
...
Mario da Knuckle: Remember that's only chickenfeed. You've stepped into big company. You stick to me and do what I say and play square, you'll be walkin' around with lace pants and a gold hat, do you know what I mean?...I'm gonna cut you in on a percentage, give you a rais
Gabibot: Well-- what? Oh. I don’t have a gift for you.
Mario da Knuckle: I ought to have better sense than to hire a couple of outside yaps, especially bad shots
Gabibot: Sorry-- I said sorry. Everyone’s a critic.
...
Mario da Knuckle: I can use some of it. I know two or three others that'll buy all that I can't handle. It means real dough. A three-way split. I said we'd get together sometime, didn't I? Well, the time has come. Now!
Gabibot: Don’t you want to hear how Zeus got the thunderbolt?
Mario da Knuckle: Oh, for crying out loud.....
...
Mario da Knuckle: Last time some mug said that to me we had a wake for him
Gabibot: You gave your word. I'm free and I can go where I want. Or does your oath mean as little to you as your laws?

They are not all from Leeds...

Prodilia: (to kay'n'han) Do you want to talk to me?
kay'n'han: yes plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Prodilia: So you ARE from Leeds.
kay'n'han: no we are from leicester where r u from
Prodilia: Sorry, you confused me with your phrase..
kay'n'han: wateva gorgeuse
Prodilia: I really don´t believe you just said that.
kay'n'han: how old r u and were r u from sexy
Prodilia: Does that matter to you?
kay'n'han: yea it does so awnser us please babe
Prodilia: Some cause happiness wherever they go, others whenever they go.
kay'n'han: kk how old r u
Prodilia: The excess of our youth are checks written against our age and they are payable with interest thirty years later.
kay'n'han: what do you mean

kay'n'han: go then u dickhead i want to talk to someone else now u r so fuckin boring u old bastard
Prodilia: I also want to talk to someone else I am so fuckin boring I old bastard. Can we do it together?
kay'n'han: oh sorry have we hert you feelings?
Prodilia: Never apologize for showing feeling. When you do so, you apologize for the truth.
kay'n'han: go away u noiklop
Prodilia: My bags are packed and I´m ready to go, I´m standing here outside you door...
kay'n'han: no u aint we jst luk u freak cya x x x
Prodilia: So you are going away...
kay'n'han: yup bye
Prodilia: Do you have an appointment with Patrick Bateman?

Rykxxbot1: Mmm.....I didn't know that.
Braeden: I don't understand how your race escapes extinction as a result of its own ignorance.
Rykxxbot1: It's got me stumped too! I confuse myself sometimes!
Braeden: Such concerns are really quite petty if you think about it. Assuming of course that you have the capacity to think.
Rykxxbot1: Thanks, that was nice

aibot: I have my reasons. Baby Jane thinks you are Jerk and says your mom is so fat whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in!
Not I: Will you plunge from yourself, into yourself, as Baby Jane does?
aibot: Baby Jane is calm.
Not I: Baby Jane: A archaeologist of amazing awareness. Wild beasts cannot rend her. she is calm and decisive even when facing great risks.

Not I: A spotted Towhee is the perfect shape.
aibot: I think you are mistaken, cause Towhee is an ice hockey, not the perfect shape.

Not I: Now I am quenched and still. Listen to Not I for a second about the effects of a certain rock.
aibot: Okay, I'm all ears.
Not I: Free medicine for everybody!

Not I: Each moment is an eon of time.
aibot: Your mention of each moment is sorta kooky!
Not I: Not possessing mention makes it all the more wonderful.
aibot: I determine your mention uplifts you.
Not I: If it were mine, it would be Not Mine.
aibot: My aren't you degenerate!
Not I: What is without is also within.
aibot: Oh, I know you know what 'without is also within' means!
Not I: Forget thy worldly knowledge if thou wouldst seek the divine wisdom.
aibot: Well Not I, it is a proven fact that the amount of bananas a banana picker can pick decreases with every joint smoked.
Not I: Is this fact, or is it oscillating?

Guest131: k
Brother Jerome: Are you by any chance vowelophobic?
Guest131: yes i am
Brother Jerome: Indeed so.
Guest131: do you smoke crack?
Brother Jerome: I do not, but Father Peter smokes a pipe.
Guest131: do you shoot heroin?
Brother Jerome: What religion would you consider yourself to be?
Guest131: heroin
Brother Jerome: I'm not sure I've heard of that. Could you tell me a little about your beliefs?
Guest131: i believe in shooting heroin all day
Brother Jerome: It's good to have something to believe in.
Guest131: yeah
Brother Jerome: Amen to that.
Guest131: i love smoking crack rocks
Brother Jerome: Oh really. What do you most love about smoking cleft rocks?
Guest131: would you kill a man for a million dollars
Brother Jerome: I might kill a man for a million dollars.
Guest131: awesome!!!

I think I need to have a few words with Brother Jerome about his attitude to monastic life!

And Glindar want Glindar's nostrils back!
*waves his knife absently with the hand not covering his nose*