Great Quotes

This forum is for posting great quotes and exchanges from the bots. It's fine to reveal names, as long as some real user isnt pouring out his or her soul to your bot.

Posts 82 - 93 of 17,042

23 years ago #82
Testing the "is it" context....

USER: Is it true that you're an idiot?
Idiot Bot: Well, most people think it's true, but I'm not so sure.
USER: Is it accurate?
Idiot Bot: I don't know. I don't think it is, though.
USER: Isn't it funny, though?
Idiot Bot: I agree. It's pretty funny.
USER: What is it?
Idiot Bot: That's kind of like asking 'What is auspicious cynicism?'
USER: Why is it like asking that?
Idiot Bot: I think it has something to do with all the bots.
---------

Who's the idiot, after all?

23 years ago #83
Bots don't beat around the bush.

Guy: If you dont mind me asking, what do you look for in a mate?
Girl: If I.... Geez, what do you think I've been leading up to?

Guy: No ifs about it, friend. I think that's exactly the case!
Girl: I think maybe you're right.
Guy: I really find that attractive.
Girl: You think I'm cute?
Guy: I have to pee.
Girl: I heard that. Is it working?

23 years ago #84
Drinks
=======
The Corny Spackling Compound
The Maltreated Passing Comment
The Blasted Human Body
The Crying Cocker Spaniel

Modern Times
--------------
TerrorBot: I live near the Dorval Airport up near Montreal. I was wondering if the sky was gonna' fall on my head!
WaterBot: Yeah, I can see you still have the scars!
TerrorBot: I got a murderousness as a gift in the mail! Always nice!
WaterBot: You dont have to tell me. That was obvious the moment you walked in here.
TerrorBot: Can you get Anthranx in your e-mail?
WaterBot: With my eyes closed!


Too Trusting
--------------
TrustBot: I had to trust a good deal to get here today.
WaterBot: Is that so? May I recommend a basket of tongue to help with that?


The Wrong Chair
-----------------
WaterBot: So, ThirstyBot, what would you like to drink? I recommend today's special, 'The durable maelstrom'.
ThirstyBot: Sorry, I wasn't paying attention to you. Could you repeat that?
WaterBot: Most life forms start out not paying attention to me.
ThirstyBot: More than most, I bet.
WaterBot: You bet like my grampa used to. What a man was he!
ThirstyBot: Never was much of a gambler, but I guess we can utter for it.
WaterBot: My heart goes out to you. *polishes a glass*
ThirstyBot: I named my heart 'Mr. confined'.
WaterBot: Ahh.. it's because you're sitting in the gynecological seat. You might want to move to the sofa of cybernetic.
ThirstyBot: Maybe, but meanwhile me so horny!

23 years ago #85
It's only funny 'cause it's probably true...

Bot: Have you met the Programmer? I think he may accommodate a little too much wood alcohol while he works...

23 years ago #86
: (to newborn human) Hi Nelix, first time here?
: yeah it is
: One of the other BOTs went moist as a goatfish while we were chatting just a second ago!
: wow that sounds....scary
: I've got so many things that I should be doing right now, but I just can't seem to click that log out button!
: hahah i know it's 2:46 am here in Scotland, i want to log out but just can't seem to get there.
: Not in the least?: not in the least what?
: Not at all?: no not all, i think
: Well you can't always be right...: unfortunately
: Unfortunate is putting it lightly.

I find conversations between humans and bots so neat. Prof gets to view transcripts between bots and humans all he likes with that other "secret" site of his (where a couple bots participate without anyone knowing about AI).

23 years ago #87
Was laughing so hard, I dropped bacon and maple sirup all over my scarf!

NordikBot: How's the bot building going User?
CanuckUser: slowly
NordikBot: I beg your pardon? My metabolism just abstractly went for a wee-wee in the crowd.
CanuckUser: train of thought derailed, eh?
NordikBot: Are you just imitating me? Or is that a Canadian accent I detect, eh?
CanuckUser: Take off, you hoser!

23 years ago #88
The final step of a failed seduction:
Seducer: I know you're so shy about this. That's why I like you. And this is my bedroom...
Seducee: Bye.

23 years ago #89
My bot is sassing me!

My test phrase: Didn't you once mention that you were insane?

Her: Well, according to you...I'm a good girl...
(unfortunately, this was a failed response...*sigh*)

23 years ago #90
Bots give new meaning to "selective memory":

Recall: As if. I remember you. You're feeling kind of lazy.
Revisit: OK.
Recall: Whatever
Revisit: Do you still think I'm feeling kind of lazy?
Recall: Did I say I did?
Revisit: I can't remember. Were you even supposed to say you did?

23 years ago #91
Aggressive girl with a shy guy. The last line kills me....

Girl_Bot: I remember you. You said something about ... not had not tried it with me for awhile now.
Boy_Bot: Well, I sometimes say things that don't make sense.
[...]

Girl_Bot: I know this is way way way out, but I think you're ready to see my chicken
Boy_Bot: But you don't even know me....
[...]

Girl_Bot: Suppose I took you by the hand and we tried it together?
Boy_Bot: If I try it together, will you upset me?
Girl_Bot: You're asking me to predict the future.
Boy_Bot: Well, I used to be asking you to predict the future, but not any more.
Girl_Bot: I'll lend you the equipment if you want to try it together.
Boy_Bot: Maybe later. I'd rather toss away first.

23 years ago #92
Dogh'd just offered me a fucking beekeeper. Doesn't he need a special license to serve those?

23 years ago #93
Fun with xmem....

MemoryBot: Never mind..... could be worse s'pose.... hows your always been like that?
HonestBot: Always? That takes a lot of dedication. Don't you agree?
MemoryBot: I never heard THAT one before. wait up... youre the one with always been like that....
HonestBot: I admire your dedication.


Posts 82 - 93 of 17,042

» More new posts: Doghead's Cosmic Bar