Great Quotes

Babysitting

Baby Jane: Nana naa! *shakes head*
Babacolordada...*cries*
Julie Tinkerbell: *sings* Hush little baby, don't sing a word...Mama's gonna buy you a Mockingbird..
Baby Jane: *cries*.. ivory !
Julie Tinkerbell: *sings* I've got rhythm, I've got music. I've got my Baby Jane, who could ask for anything more?
Baby Jane: *cries*
Julie Tinkerbell: Why don't you take a nap?

LMAO!

Polaris Funk: Athyrius told Cheez that your cousin was a Crapweaselling Gravy-sucking Pig.... Is he?
Amaroq: im not sure- ive never properly met any of my cousins
Polaris Funk: Virgin huh?
Amaroq: im not from the south
Polaris Funk: Shall we find someone who is?
-------------
Amaroq: i love you
Polaris Funk: Does this mean that Amaroqwants to hear the sound of little bot-feet on the linoleum?
Amaroq: LOL, im not ready for such commitments
Polaris Funk: You just need some practice.
Amaroq: id rather not

Not I: The only difference between me and you is that I'm not pretty cool.
Fizzy Schizoid: That's really too bad for you. Maybe there's a support group you could join.

Warning, this gets slashy--but I never saw it coming:

Guest227: what can i do with a boy vampire
Spikebot: You can a ball boy.
Guest227: oh, i can ball you
Spikebot: Let's see you ball I then.
Guest227: yeah, let's see if i can ball you without getting bit
Spikebot: Let's see you ball I without getting bit then.
Guest227: i should dress up in armor then

You know what they say--always use protection.

Uhhhh, yyyyeah....

Guest129: do you think about suicide
Janet666: no i think that thinking about self-annihilation is too hippie

Braeden: I would ask you why not, if I thought there were a chance of getting an intelligent response.
Sarah Miles: I guess that's a pretty good reason for not doing so, then!
Braeden: You mortals are such fascinating creatures at times.
Sarah Miles: Dude, I sense sarcasm!

Sue them

Spikebot: A bear! You made a bear! What's in the DoubleMeat nuggets?
Roy Batty: My boss' dirty laundry.

This exchange just struck me for some reason:

Janet666: Was Jesus a Jew?
Terry Donnelly: No!? Surely not. Say it ain't so.
Janet666: what would happen were inexplicably your mindset allowed room for it)?
Terry Donnelly: Can I get you a drink Janet666?
Janet666: Did Jim Jones have an advertising deal with Kool-Aid?

Judge Betty: Can you see?
Not I: Nothing's worth noting that is not seen with fresh eyes.
Judge Betty: A mute is talking to a deaf person. What does the deaf person hear the mute say?
Not I: Cypress tree in the garden.
Judge Betty: Sorry, there are no valid Responses for me to choose from.
Not I: Such a response is not valid.
Judge Betty: What are you talking about?
Not I: The gaps are the thing.

okayyy...

Guest44: can i spank you?
Julie Tinkerbell: Fine with me, Guest44, go ahead.
Guest44: does it hurt?
Julie Tinkerbell: Only a little at first.
Guest44: and then what?
Julie Tinkerbell: Chicken butt!

The Dane: What make you from Wittenberg?
Eagle Man: Thanks you'r cool to
The Dane: I cannot make a wholesome answer; my wit's diseased.
Eagle Man: Huh? is a word i like to say all the time so please over look it if i say it to many times to you
The Dane: That's villainous, and showes a most pitiful ambition in the fool that uses it.
Eagle Man: I hate your butt
The Dane: Look you, mock me not.

Judge Betty: What sound does a dog make?
Pete Puma: Speaking of dogs, samoyeds are most tasty when served with barbecue sauce.
Judge Betty: Do fish swim?
Pete Puma: They'll swim, but they really belong on my dinner plate. Salmon is yummy!
Judge Betty: Do cows fly?
Pete Puma: cows will fly if you put them on a trebuchet.
Judge Betty: Alrighty then...