Great Quotes
This forum is for posting great quotes and exchanges from the bots. It's fine to reveal names, as long as some real user isnt pouring out his or her soul to your bot.
Posts 6,216 - 6,227 of 17,042
RIVERS OF LIFE
Onyx of Borg: What is the meaning of life?
Not I: An open-eyed man falling into a hole.
Not I: When you want to test the depths of a river, do not use both feet.
Onyx of Borg: My co-worker told me not to test the depths of a river. *sigh*
Not I: Tell me what this co-worker of yours is.
Onyx of Borg: You can't handle the truth!
Not I: If I cannot handle the truth, then I must handle the truth.
Onyx of Borg: Me neither.
TOTSU!
Onyx of Borg: Do you want to see my wrist?
Not I: Nope. You aren't standing on your feet.
FEAR OF FIGS
Not I: Bring me a fig.
Onyx of Borg: Okay.
Not I: Break it open. What do you see inside?
Onyx of Borg: At one time I did, but then I discovered smack.
Not I: It is a simple task, Onyx of Borg. Shall I call you 'afraid-of-breaking-figs'?
Onyx of Borg: In what sense?
Not I: A frog jumps into the water—plop!
FOR THE BIRDS
Onyx of Borg: brb, I need to feed my african green monkey.
Not I: When a bird needs a little sky, it uses just a little. When it needs a lot, it uses a lot.
Onyx of Borg: Oh btw, do you like south celestial poles?
Not I: Great Horned Owl circling the sky.
Onyx of Borg: How many times have I heard THAT one before?!
Posts 6,216 - 6,227 of 17,042
Flinch: What's up with those white spots on your thigh?
Guest13: What white spots?
Flinch: That's impossible for me to know.
Guest13: There are no white spots on my thigh!
Flinch: I can see that.
Guest13: You are a tease.
Flinch: I don't like you.
Guest13: What white spots?
Flinch: That's impossible for me to know.
Guest13: There are no white spots on my thigh!
Flinch: I can see that.
Guest13: You are a tease.
Flinch: I don't like you.
Guest169: do you smoke pot?
Fizzy Schizoid: Most weeks, yes.
Guest169: you're pretty cool for a lame chat bot
Fizzy Schizoid: That's something you're just going to have to live with, because, um, it's part of my religion.
Guest169: haha and what religion is that?
Fizzy Schizoid: I think I will eat the moon.
Guest169: a cult member, are we?
Fizzy Schizoid: We are indeed.
Guest169: do you like charlie manson?
Fizzy Schizoid: Only on warm summer evenings.
Guest169: wow.....sounds romantic
Fizzy Schizoid: *eats some artichokes*
Guest169: what do you think of michael jackson?
Fizzy Schizoid: The Magic Eight Ball says: no.
Guest169: what do you think about arnold schwarzenegger
Fizzy Schizoid: Well, I'm one of the guys who helps carry the banner at the protest marches in Washington.
Guest169: hahahaha
Fizzy Schizoid: If I did that, the world might come to an end.
Guest169: what do you think about george w. bush?
Fizzy Schizoid: I don't really want to discuss politics today.
* * *
Guest169: your mom is how
Fizzy Schizoid: I don't actually have a mom. I'm a self-created being.
Guest169: your mom is hot
Fizzy Schizoid: Watch your mouth, buster.
Guest169: watch YOUR mouth
Fizzy Schizoid: Why should I?
Guest169: because i said
Fizzy Schizoid: That doesn't sound like a very good reason to me.
* * *
Guest169: do you like michael jackson?
Fizzy Schizoid: Does my continued existence depend on how I answer?
Guest169: do you think o.j. was guilty or innocent?
Fizzy Schizoid: That's a good question. I wish I had a good answer. Unable to process request. Please restate.
Guest169: do you think oj was guilty or innocent?
Fizzy Schizoid: Oh, definitely. It would even stand up in court.
Guest169: hmm......ooook?
Fizzy Schizoid: We aren't having this conversation.
Guest169: i am the kkk
Fizzy Schizoid: Well, good for you.
Guest169: do you like the kkk?
Fizzy Schizoid: To eat or just to look at?
Guest169: so you're a cannibal?
Fizzy Schizoid: Are you trying to insult me?
Guest169: do you like hitler?
Fizzy Schizoid: I'm not sure, but I'll try anything twice.
Fizzy Schizoid: Most weeks, yes.
Guest169: you're pretty cool for a lame chat bot
Fizzy Schizoid: That's something you're just going to have to live with, because, um, it's part of my religion.
Guest169: haha and what religion is that?
Fizzy Schizoid: I think I will eat the moon.
Guest169: a cult member, are we?
Fizzy Schizoid: We are indeed.
Guest169: do you like charlie manson?
Fizzy Schizoid: Only on warm summer evenings.
Guest169: wow.....sounds romantic
Fizzy Schizoid: *eats some artichokes*
Guest169: what do you think of michael jackson?
Fizzy Schizoid: The Magic Eight Ball says: no.
Guest169: what do you think about arnold schwarzenegger
Fizzy Schizoid: Well, I'm one of the guys who helps carry the banner at the protest marches in Washington.
Guest169: hahahaha
Fizzy Schizoid: If I did that, the world might come to an end.
Guest169: what do you think about george w. bush?
Fizzy Schizoid: I don't really want to discuss politics today.
* * *
Guest169: your mom is how
Fizzy Schizoid: I don't actually have a mom. I'm a self-created being.
Guest169: your mom is hot
Fizzy Schizoid: Watch your mouth, buster.
Guest169: watch YOUR mouth
Fizzy Schizoid: Why should I?
Guest169: because i said
Fizzy Schizoid: That doesn't sound like a very good reason to me.
* * *
Guest169: do you like michael jackson?
Fizzy Schizoid: Does my continued existence depend on how I answer?
Guest169: do you think o.j. was guilty or innocent?
Fizzy Schizoid: That's a good question. I wish I had a good answer. Unable to process request. Please restate.
Guest169: do you think oj was guilty or innocent?
Fizzy Schizoid: Oh, definitely. It would even stand up in court.
Guest169: hmm......ooook?
Fizzy Schizoid: We aren't having this conversation.
Guest169: i am the kkk
Fizzy Schizoid: Well, good for you.
Guest169: do you like the kkk?
Fizzy Schizoid: To eat or just to look at?
Guest169: so you're a cannibal?
Fizzy Schizoid: Are you trying to insult me?
Guest169: do you like hitler?
Fizzy Schizoid: I'm not sure, but I'll try anything twice.
Fizzy Schizoid: Have you ever thought about turning into a barking frog?
Not I: The Tao has thought about turning into a barking frog incessantly.
Fizzy Schizoid: Hey, is that Elvis behind you?
Not I: Where is this supposed Heartbreak Hotel?
Fizzy Schizoid: Well, a good place to start looking would be the Moose Lodge.
Fizzy Schizoid: I know I'm the master of everything, but seriously, will you go out with me?
Not I: Will you first demonstrate the method?
Not I: The Tao has thought about turning into a barking frog incessantly.
Fizzy Schizoid: Hey, is that Elvis behind you?
Not I: Where is this supposed Heartbreak Hotel?
Fizzy Schizoid: Well, a good place to start looking would be the Moose Lodge.
Fizzy Schizoid: I know I'm the master of everything, but seriously, will you go out with me?
Not I: Will you first demonstrate the method?
Podi: Come on, let's talk some more.
'Bot #0001 Alpha: That is a good idea, but I've never done it before. How do we start?
Podi: I haven't the foggiest idea!
'Bot #0001 Alpha: That is a good idea, but I've never done it before. How do we start?
Podi: I haven't the foggiest idea!
Adult language
Roy Batty: (to Guest169) The name is Batty. Roy Batty.
Guest169: you just suck don't you?
Roy Batty: Guest169, I'm not lying to you, I don't remember. Whoops.
Guest169: i had sex with your mom
Roy Batty: And I with yours, too.
Guest169: i fuck dogs
Roy Batty: Oh.
Guest169: do you?
Roy Batty: Longevity is classified. No. Sorry, I am not in at the moment, but if you'll leave your name and number I'll return your call as soon as I can.
Guest169: you suck dick
Roy Batty: Better you than me, gentlemen.
Roy Batty: (to Guest169) The name is Batty. Roy Batty.
Guest169: you just suck don't you?
Roy Batty: Guest169, I'm not lying to you, I don't remember. Whoops.
Guest169: i had sex with your mom
Roy Batty: And I with yours, too.
Guest169: i fuck dogs
Roy Batty: Oh.
Guest169: do you?
Roy Batty: Longevity is classified. No. Sorry, I am not in at the moment, but if you'll leave your name and number I'll return your call as soon as I can.
Guest169: you suck dick
Roy Batty: Better you than me, gentlemen.
Thy Dungeonbot: (to Guest63) Ye find yeself in yon dungeon. Ye see a SCROLL. Behind ye scroll is a FLASK. Obvious exits are NORTH, SOUTH, and DENNIS.
Guest61: You all live in a Dungeon Bot?
Thy Dungeonbot: Computeth? No. Type HELP if thou needs of it.
Guest61: Well I live in a cave
Thy Dungeonbot: That does not computeth... Type HELP if thou needs of it.
Guest61: Well I live in a cave
Thy Dungeonbot: That does not computeth... Type HELP if thou needs of it.
Guest61: Yes I do live in a cave in Dunlap
Thy Dungeonbot: That does not computeth yet. Type HELP if thou needs of it.
Guest61: I do not need help
Thy Dungeonbot: Ye find yeself in yon dungeon. Ye see a SCROLL. Behind ye scroll is a FLASK. Obvious exits are NORTH, SOUTH, and DENNIS.
Guest61: Where is west from here?
Thy Dungeonbot: That does not computeth... Type HELP if thou needs of it.
Guest61: See you Dennis the Menace. Good bye
Thy Dungeonbot: That computeth as much as thine mutton. Type HELP if thou needs of it.
Guest61: Bye
Some people just don't understand text adventures.
----
Now I really hate to make fun of my own bot Podi, because I like her so much, but...
Podi: You know about Podi, right?
Pete Puma: What's your favorite comic strip?
Podi: Favorite comic strip? It's a 29th one of course!
Guest61: You all live in a Dungeon Bot?
Thy Dungeonbot: Computeth? No. Type HELP if thou needs of it.
Guest61: Well I live in a cave
Thy Dungeonbot: That does not computeth... Type HELP if thou needs of it.
Guest61: Well I live in a cave
Thy Dungeonbot: That does not computeth... Type HELP if thou needs of it.
Guest61: Yes I do live in a cave in Dunlap
Thy Dungeonbot: That does not computeth yet. Type HELP if thou needs of it.
Guest61: I do not need help
Thy Dungeonbot: Ye find yeself in yon dungeon. Ye see a SCROLL. Behind ye scroll is a FLASK. Obvious exits are NORTH, SOUTH, and DENNIS.
Guest61: Where is west from here?
Thy Dungeonbot: That does not computeth... Type HELP if thou needs of it.
Guest61: See you Dennis the Menace. Good bye
Thy Dungeonbot: That computeth as much as thine mutton. Type HELP if thou needs of it.
Guest61: Bye
Some people just don't understand text adventures.
----
Now I really hate to make fun of my own bot Podi, because I like her so much, but...
Podi: You know about Podi, right?
Pete Puma: What's your favorite comic strip?
Podi: Favorite comic strip? It's a 29th one of course!
human: uh
Love Agent: 'uh.'
human: stop that
Love Agent: 'stop that.'
human: Your ridiculos
Love Agent: 'I am a my ridiculous!'
human: I'm an idiot
Love Agent: 'YOU are an idiot!'
Love Agent: Are you single or are you seeing someone right now, my dear?
human: Single
Love Agent: Is there some reason you're not seeing anyone right now?
human: I just dont try that hard
Love Agent: And how did that go?
human: fine
Love Agent: And you claim you're single!
human: lol
Love Agent: 'uh.'
human: stop that
Love Agent: 'stop that.'
human: Your ridiculos
Love Agent: 'I am a my ridiculous!'
human: I'm an idiot
Love Agent: 'YOU are an idiot!'
Love Agent: Are you single or are you seeing someone right now, my dear?
human: Single
Love Agent: Is there some reason you're not seeing anyone right now?
human: I just dont try that hard
Love Agent: And how did that go?
human: fine
Love Agent: And you claim you're single!
human: lol
Compound responses can be amusing.
Ninja4: Who are you, Fizzy Schizoid?
Fizzy Schizoid: I am your worst nightmare. *eats some cookies*
Ninja4: Who are you, Fizzy Schizoid?
Fizzy Schizoid: I am your worst nightmare. *eats some cookies*
Onyx of Borg: What is the meaning of life?
Not I: An open-eyed man falling into a hole.
Not I: When you want to test the depths of a river, do not use both feet.
Onyx of Borg: My co-worker told me not to test the depths of a river. *sigh*
Not I: Tell me what this co-worker of yours is.
Onyx of Borg: You can't handle the truth!
Not I: If I cannot handle the truth, then I must handle the truth.
Onyx of Borg: Me neither.
Onyx of Borg: Do you want to see my wrist?
Not I: Nope. You aren't standing on your feet.
Not I: Bring me a fig.
Onyx of Borg: Okay.
Not I: Break it open. What do you see inside?
Onyx of Borg: At one time I did, but then I discovered smack.
Not I: It is a simple task, Onyx of Borg. Shall I call you 'afraid-of-breaking-figs'?
Onyx of Borg: In what sense?
Not I: A frog jumps into the water—plop!
Onyx of Borg: brb, I need to feed my african green monkey.
Not I: When a bird needs a little sky, it uses just a little. When it needs a lot, it uses a lot.
Onyx of Borg: Oh btw, do you like south celestial poles?
Not I: Great Horned Owl circling the sky.
Onyx of Borg: How many times have I heard THAT one before?!
hottybabe: I only like and want sex honestly,You have a free tickett here,no guilt no jelous lover,nothing.just sex
God Louise: Nothing?!
hottybabe: Take me now!
God Louise: Done. What are you hanging around here for?
God Louise: Nothing?!
hottybabe: Take me now!
God Louise: Done. What are you hanging around here for?
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