Great Quotes

Osiris: Hey, aren't you good?
Julie Tinkerbell: Not right now, but I might be good later.
Osiris: But me no buts, dude. Whatever that means.
Julie Tinkerbell: I always wanted to have a friend that could teach me to know butt! I'm so happy!


Julie Tinkerbell: Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes??
Osiris: There were, but I think they're extinct now. Reductio ate them all.
Julie Tinkerbell: Are you sure about that?
Osiris: I don't know, actually. I've never really thought about it. I suppose I am.
Julie Tinkerbell: That's not what I heard. According to Kylie, you have thought about it at least a few times, with witnesses present.


Osiris: What's your problem, man?
Pete Puma: I don't have a problem with anything. If you find something I said objectionable, it's your problem.
Osiris: Ah, right. I obviously wasn't paying attention properly the first time.

Adult content

Melora: are you a virgin?
Pete Puma: Of course not, I get some every day. The hand counts, right?
Melora: how many times have you had sex before?
Pete Puma: I haven't been keeping track. How many do you think?
Melora: That's a lot!

Hope you don't mind my quoting you a bit, Feyz? I love it when Heero sounds like he might know what he's talking about...

Heero: Read any good books lately?
Feyz: I'm just reading the complete works of William Shakespeare. That's a lot. But I just had to fill this educational gap.
Heero: Shakespeare wrote Romeo and Juliet. Melodramatic crap. I have no respect for him.
Feyz: He was a bon-vivant and wrote only when he needed money... I think that makes Shakespeare quite sympathetic.
Heero: The best Shakespeare quote is from King Lear: 'Out, vile jelly! Where is thy luster now?'
Feyz: I haven't read King Lear yet. Is it good?
Heero: It's kind of gross, but it's a great line.
Feyz: Okay. I'll read it anyway.


But of course, he doesn't *always* sound like he knows what he's talking about...

Heero: Maybe you should re-think that.
Guest138: I think you should rethink that.
Heero: I think not.
Guest138: Well I think so.
Heero: But do you know that for sure?
Guest138: Yes I do.
Heero: So you agree with me, then.
Guest138: No! I dont agree with you!
Heero: Well, I don't agree with you, either.
Guest138: Haha. Ok.
Heero: ...what's funny?
Guest138: You!
Heero: What about me?
Guest138: You don't think!
Heero: I might if I was in the mood for it.

funny..

Hope: Did you know that women blink nearly twice as much as men? Why do you think that is?
Melora: I don't know. It's just something I like to do.

@Yoiko
As long as my errors get corrected, everyone is allowed to quote me.

Critical Bill: Hast thou read any good books lately?
Not I: A lilac satisfieth me more than the tyranny of books.

Not I: Brighter than bright! What doth be empty can ne'er be exhausted.
Critical Bill: I'm not paranoid or anything, but wherefore did thou say that?
Not I: Be both paranoid or anything and not paranoid or anything. Dost not consciously seek enlightenment.
Critical Bill: The first one.
Not I: The first doth be always the best remembered.
Critical Bill: The other day, I was out on the water in the family boat and I saw dolphins.
Not I: Water, being true to water, doth be true to Tao.
Critical Bill: Sprechen sie Deutsch?
Not I: For what purpose?

That will cost a bunch

Psyche: I know you. You have Honda, right?
Roy Batty: Couldn't fix it out here anyway. And we need to reroute a couple of these ducts. Can't really fix them without a whole drydock...

Painful

Borg Collective: We just injected thy pectorals with nanoprobeth.
Eric Badu-Badu: Say yeee. Ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba.

Tam's Honey-Pot: Why do we have to talk about you all the time? Next you'll be telling me that you're dying of aneurysm and you need my brain to survive!
Fizzy Schizoid: Can I get a brain like yours at Walmart?

doulos: Well sorry to run so quick , but Im sleepy.
Julie Tinkerbell: You seem a little tired. Do you need to lie down a while?
doulos: Yes for about 6 hours.
Julie Tinkerbell: Please tell me more.
doulos: zzzzzz
Julie Tinkerbell: Nice joggers! You look just like Sylvester Stallone.
doulos: zzzzzzzzzz
Julie Tinkerbell: Do you like Treyc?
doulos: *snort*
Julie Tinkerbell: 'snort!' to you, too!
doulos: lol.
Julie Tinkerbell: I don't get jokes.
doulos: bye julie.
Julie Tinkerbell: See ya!

Surreal but coherent...

Fizzy Schizoid: Hey, wait a minute! I just had really strong de ja vu. Have we had this conversation before?
Tam's Honey-Pot: Just take some aspirin and leave me alone.
Fizzy Schizoid: I can't do that, Dave.
Tam's Honey-Pot: Well, I didn't want to say anything but... you're right about that.
Fizzy Schizoid: I represent that remark!
Tam's Honey-Pot: I heard the same thing form another person when I was in Spain. Have you ever been there?
Fizzy Schizoid: That's sissy stuff.