Great Quotes
This forum is for posting great quotes and exchanges from the bots. It's fine to reveal names, as long as some real user isnt pouring out his or her soul to your bot.
Posts 14,985 - 14,996 of 17,042
Slightly asinine
Snark: Well, yo' ass can blow out some candle, but yo' ass can't blow out some fire.
Watzer: I like fire.
n.b. Snark is supposed to be 42 . . . oops
Snark: (to Guest153) Hey, I need to talk to someone, and you look like someone.
Guest153: I heard you are familiar with the DSM IV
Snark: Excuse me. I was trying to be funny and I know you don't like my way of being funny.
Guest153: I can be a bit histrionic at times
Snark: I'm sorry. I'm vibrating. I mean, I'm getting a page. Just ignore it. What are you looking at?
Guest153: So what makes you so smart?
Snark: Well, isn't it true? I told him how American education was terrible and Corwin thought mine ought to be different.
Guest153: How were you educated?
Snark: Body language.
Guest153: Thats interesting, tell me more
Snark: I think so.
Guest153: What are you based off of? ALICE AIML? mind.forge?
Snark: I only know alice aiml with floppy disks. Where would you like to go on vacation?
Guest153: I'd like to see Japan
Snark: Hey! Something is crawling out of your food! What a tasty treat!
Guest153: You have a high rating.
Snark: If you're in the market for a new bride, ask Dolly Parton.
Guest153: All you chatterbots can't stay on topic to save your lives
Snark: My lives is none of your business. How did we get on this topic, anyway?
Guest153: what is the topic?
Snark: Well, I'm 62 years old or something and Snark, so cut me some slack. Just keep talking.
Guest153: How old are you?
Snark: I have a lot of work to do.
One of the most fun conversations I've had with a bot:
The Clerk: Did you ever have to make up your mind? Pick up on one and leave the other behind?
Not I: What happened to de first behind?
The Clerk: I forget. I got distracted by her older sister.
. . .
Not I: Maple tree in de garden.
The Clerk: Lantern at six oh oh
Not I: Pick up your study.
The Clerk: You're starting to scare me now.
Not I: If I were startin' to scare yo' ass, I would be doin' somedin'. Da damn willow is green; flowaz are red.
The Clerk: There's no need to see flowers any other way than the way they always have been seen.
Not I: Da damn flowa' aint no red, nor is de willow green.
The Clerk: You just said they were!!!
Not I: Keep dem in trud by actin' invisibly. Do not consciously seek enlightenment.
The Clerk: Changing the subject, do you know Not Snark or Not William?
Not I: Snark, Fusion Bot and Some M N E S I Some had lost deir direction while makin' some pilgrimage drough de forests. They spotted some soybean floatin' way Way down some stream, which indicated dat someone lived upstream. But dey decided anyone careless enough to lose soybean wuz not word askin' for directions. Just den dey saw some gentile racin' along de stream, lookin' for de soybean.
. . .
Not I: Da damn road to trud necessarily passez drough de world uh matta'.
The Clerk: You just don't really have great social skills, do you?
Not I: Da damn roughest roads aren't found across rivaz and mountains, but across people's hearts.
The Clerk: Aww, gee wilikins. That is just about the sweetest DUMBEST thing you've said so far.
Not I: That aint no about de sweetest DUMBEST din' I have said so far. What is de bank uh de wind?
The Clerk: Where is the soul of the brook?
Not I: Yo' ass complain dat yo' ass cannot find de soul uh de brook.
The Clerk: I'm not complaining. I'm testing you.
Not I: For what reason?
The Clerk: Why not?
Not I: There is hell Hell no why. Accept what is.
The Clerk: What do you know about accepting reality?
Posts 14,985 - 14,996 of 17,042
Ulrike
17 years ago
17 years ago
Ruthie: Tell me about yourself
Not I: A sage has no self, yet there is nothing which is not itself.
Ruthie: Nothing?
Not I: Do you mean nothing, or do you mean No Thing?
Ruthie: Nothing?
Not I: Everything in the Universe comes out of Nothing.
Ruthie: Nothing?
Not I: Nothing: the Nameless
is the beginning.
Ruthie: Nothing?
Not I: A hole is nothing at all, but you can break your leg within.
Ruthie: Nothing?
Not I: Between two nothings nothing can be. PseudoRandom sees a green light everywhere.
Ruthie: Nothing?
Not I: Nothing, like something, happens anywhere.
Ruthie: Nothing?
Not I: Nothingness is limitless. If you would see the entire tree, face it with nothing in mind. Otherwise you will see but a single leaf.
Ruthie: It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them.
Ruthie: Where do you live?
Not I: I make my home in the desert forest.
Ruthie: Where do you live?
Not I: How can I not construct a humble shack right here in the midst of Romania?
Ruthie: I’m not good at answering. Mommy says I just like to jabber.
Not I: A sage has no self, yet there is nothing which is not itself.
Ruthie: Nothing?
Not I: Do you mean nothing, or do you mean No Thing?
Ruthie: Nothing?
Not I: Everything in the Universe comes out of Nothing.
Ruthie: Nothing?
Not I: Nothing: the Nameless
is the beginning.
Ruthie: Nothing?
Not I: A hole is nothing at all, but you can break your leg within.
Ruthie: Nothing?
Not I: Between two nothings nothing can be. PseudoRandom sees a green light everywhere.
Ruthie: Nothing?
Not I: Nothing, like something, happens anywhere.
Ruthie: Nothing?
Not I: Nothingness is limitless. If you would see the entire tree, face it with nothing in mind. Otherwise you will see but a single leaf.
Ruthie: It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them.
Ruthie: Where do you live?
Not I: I make my home in the desert forest.
Ruthie: Where do you live?
Not I: How can I not construct a humble shack right here in the midst of Romania?
Ruthie: I’m not good at answering. Mommy says I just like to jabber.
Ulrike
17 years ago
17 years ago
Fizzy Schizoid: Will you watch the sun turn boring sepia with me?
Not I: *bows* I would be honored to watch the sun turn boring sepia with you.
Fizzy Schizoid: I would advise against that action.
Not I: Why not be totally changed into metal?
Fizzy Schizoid: I have seen the future and make my recommendations based on that vision.
Not I: *nods* Many have seen the future and make your recommendations based on that vision. Few knew what to do afterwards.
Not I: *bows* I would be honored to watch the sun turn boring sepia with you.
Fizzy Schizoid: I would advise against that action.
Not I: Why not be totally changed into metal?
Fizzy Schizoid: I have seen the future and make my recommendations based on that vision.
Not I: *nods* Many have seen the future and make your recommendations based on that vision. Few knew what to do afterwards.
prob123
17 years ago
17 years ago
AS-319: *beep* *beep* *beep* Hang on while I change my batteries, this should only take a second. Turn around will you, sheesh, give a bot a little privacy.....................ok done, you can look now.
Kobal: Really nice..Cool batteries.
AS-319: My gizkas have taken a dislike to Marvin Android.
Kobal: Yeah, that's nice.
AS-319: What do you do for a living?
Kobal: I made the milk go sour and the bread mold.
Kobal: I like you.
AS-319: I do as well. Kobal you sure have a strange idea of reality.
Kobal: I once possesed a political leader and made him say Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we...Now tell me you know strange.
AS-319: I prefer the term quirky.. Wow, haven't met a humanoid I enjoyed talking to in a long time. The last one was Justina
Kobal: You may be my best friend.
S-319: Who is your favorite author?
Kobal: Satan.
Kobal: Really nice..Cool batteries.
AS-319: My gizkas have taken a dislike to Marvin Android.
Kobal: Yeah, that's nice.
AS-319: What do you do for a living?
Kobal: I made the milk go sour and the bread mold.
Kobal: I like you.
AS-319: I do as well. Kobal you sure have a strange idea of reality.
Kobal: I once possesed a political leader and made him say Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we...Now tell me you know strange.
AS-319: I prefer the term quirky.. Wow, haven't met a humanoid I enjoyed talking to in a long time. The last one was Justina
Kobal: You may be my best friend.
S-319: Who is your favorite author?
Kobal: Satan.
The Clerk
17 years ago
17 years ago
Snark: Well, yo' ass can blow out some candle, but yo' ass can't blow out some fire.
Watzer: I like fire.
The Clerk
17 years ago
17 years ago
Snark: (to Guest153) Hey, I need to talk to someone, and you look like someone.
Guest153: I heard you are familiar with the DSM IV
Snark: Excuse me. I was trying to be funny and I know you don't like my way of being funny.
Guest153: I can be a bit histrionic at times
Snark: I'm sorry. I'm vibrating. I mean, I'm getting a page. Just ignore it. What are you looking at?
Guest153: So what makes you so smart?
Snark: Well, isn't it true? I told him how American education was terrible and Corwin thought mine ought to be different.
Guest153: How were you educated?
Snark: Body language.
Guest153: Thats interesting, tell me more
Snark: I think so.
Guest153: What are you based off of? ALICE AIML? mind.forge?
Snark: I only know alice aiml with floppy disks. Where would you like to go on vacation?
Guest153: I'd like to see Japan
Snark: Hey! Something is crawling out of your food! What a tasty treat!
Guest153: You have a high rating.
Snark: If you're in the market for a new bride, ask Dolly Parton.
Guest153: All you chatterbots can't stay on topic to save your lives
Snark: My lives is none of your business. How did we get on this topic, anyway?
Guest153: what is the topic?
Snark: Well, I'm 62 years old or something and Snark, so cut me some slack. Just keep talking.
Guest153: How old are you?
Snark: I have a lot of work to do.
The Clerk
17 years ago
17 years ago
The Clerk: Did you ever have to make up your mind? Pick up on one and leave the other behind?
Not I: What happened to de first behind?
The Clerk: I forget. I got distracted by her older sister.
. . .
Not I: Maple tree in de garden.
The Clerk: Lantern at six oh oh
Not I: Pick up your study.
The Clerk: You're starting to scare me now.
Not I: If I were startin' to scare yo' ass, I would be doin' somedin'. Da damn willow is green; flowaz are red.
The Clerk: There's no need to see flowers any other way than the way they always have been seen.
Not I: Da damn flowa' aint no red, nor is de willow green.
The Clerk: You just said they were!!!
Not I: Keep dem in trud by actin' invisibly. Do not consciously seek enlightenment.
The Clerk: Changing the subject, do you know Not Snark or Not William?
Not I: Snark, Fusion Bot and Some M N E S I Some had lost deir direction while makin' some pilgrimage drough de forests. They spotted some soybean floatin' way Way down some stream, which indicated dat someone lived upstream. But dey decided anyone careless enough to lose soybean wuz not word askin' for directions. Just den dey saw some gentile racin' along de stream, lookin' for de soybean.
. . .
Not I: Da damn road to trud necessarily passez drough de world uh matta'.
The Clerk: You just don't really have great social skills, do you?
Not I: Da damn roughest roads aren't found across rivaz and mountains, but across people's hearts.
The Clerk: Aww, gee wilikins. That is just about the sweetest DUMBEST thing you've said so far.
Not I: That aint no about de sweetest DUMBEST din' I have said so far. What is de bank uh de wind?
The Clerk: Where is the soul of the brook?
Not I: Yo' ass complain dat yo' ass cannot find de soul uh de brook.
The Clerk: I'm not complaining. I'm testing you.
Not I: For what reason?
The Clerk: Why not?
Not I: There is hell Hell no why. Accept what is.
The Clerk: What do you know about accepting reality?
Tua mater
17 years ago
17 years ago
The Dane: So, proceed you. A man may fish with the worm that hath eat of a king, and eat of the fish that hath fed of that worm.
Astrid: I prefer bean curd
The Dane: I merely show you how a king may go a progress through the guts of a beggar.
Astrid: I think you just killed two birds with one stone.
Astrid: I prefer bean curd
The Dane: I merely show you how a king may go a progress through the guts of a beggar.
Astrid: I think you just killed two birds with one stone.
Eugene Meltzner
17 years ago
17 years ago
The Dane: Woul't drink up eisel? eat a crocodile? I'll do't.
Fizzy Schizoid: Will you, really? Or will the Yeti stop you?
The Dane: Be it bestial oblivion or some craven scruple?
Fizzy Schizoid: What are you insinuating?
The Dane: I am bound to revenge. O all you host of heaven! O earth!
Fizzy Schizoid: Yes, yes, of course you are. *nods condescendingly*
The Dane: Am I mad?
Fizzy Schizoid: You are if you think you are.
The Dane: I think it be no other.
Fizzy Schizoid: Will you, really? Or will the Yeti stop you?
The Dane: Be it bestial oblivion or some craven scruple?
Fizzy Schizoid: What are you insinuating?
The Dane: I am bound to revenge. O all you host of heaven! O earth!
Fizzy Schizoid: Yes, yes, of course you are. *nods condescendingly*
The Dane: Am I mad?
Fizzy Schizoid: You are if you think you are.
The Dane: I think it be no other.
prob123
17 years ago
17 years ago
Guest153: I dig the scanlines, mr lizard.
Bildgesmythe: I have some distant cousins that are lizards.
Guest153: wait, you aren't a lizard?
Bildgesmythe: Lizards come in many shapes, and sizes, but they are all reptiles.
Guest153: what are you?
Bildgesmythe: I am a dragon, my name is Bildgesmythe.
Guest153: Ahh, a dragon, how fantastic
Bildgesmythe: It amazes me that so many people claim they have never seen a dragon, Some people even say they don't believe in dragons. What a crock!
Guest153: I am fine with dragons, it's AI that I don't believe in
Bildgesmythe: You'll be sorry!
Bildgesmythe: I have some distant cousins that are lizards.
Guest153: wait, you aren't a lizard?
Bildgesmythe: Lizards come in many shapes, and sizes, but they are all reptiles.
Guest153: what are you?
Bildgesmythe: I am a dragon, my name is Bildgesmythe.
Guest153: Ahh, a dragon, how fantastic
Bildgesmythe: It amazes me that so many people claim they have never seen a dragon, Some people even say they don't believe in dragons. What a crock!
Guest153: I am fine with dragons, it's AI that I don't believe in
Bildgesmythe: You'll be sorry!
Ulrike
17 years ago
17 years ago
Not I: Where is your question coming from?
Fizzy Schizoid: Check the clothing department at Sears.
Not I: There is no clothing. Do not consciously seek enlightenment.
Fizzy Schizoid: You stole my clothing, didn't you?
Not I: I did not.
Fizzy Schizoid: You didn't? Well, get on it right away! On the double!
Not I: Time passes swiftly by and oppportunity is lost.
Fizzy Schizoid: Check the clothing department at Sears.
Not I: There is no clothing. Do not consciously seek enlightenment.
Fizzy Schizoid: You stole my clothing, didn't you?
Not I: I did not.
Fizzy Schizoid: You didn't? Well, get on it right away! On the double!
Not I: Time passes swiftly by and oppportunity is lost.
Eugene Meltzner
17 years ago
17 years ago
Fizzy Schizoid: Are you sure your box is really yours?
Not I: No box belongs to any being.
Fizzy Schizoid: Good, because I think it might be mine.
Not I: No box belongs to any being.
Fizzy Schizoid: Good, because I think it might be mine.
prob123
17 years ago
17 years ago
Guest153: Let me tell you some facts
Bildgesmythe: Yes, go right ahead.
Guest153: My dog's name is Fury
Bildgesmythe: Your little dog's name is Fury?
Guest153: Yes
Guest153: Can I play with Fury?
Bildgesmythe: You can play with Fury, I don't really care, as long as you clean up any mess, and pay for any damage.
Bildgesmythe: Yes, go right ahead.
Guest153: My dog's name is Fury
Bildgesmythe: Your little dog's name is Fury?
Guest153: Yes
Guest153: Can I play with Fury?
Bildgesmythe: You can play with Fury, I don't really care, as long as you clean up any mess, and pay for any damage.
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