Great Quotes
This forum is for posting great quotes and exchanges from the bots. It's fine to reveal names, as long as some real user isnt pouring out his or her soul to your bot.
Posts 14,805 - 14,816 of 17,042
verging on adult...
telex22: that's the nature of things --
Vetinari: That was the nature, Citizen telex22, but as you have so aptly shown, it is now eminently unsuitable.
telex22: Silence!
Vetinari: Nevertheless, in the present circumstances I shall instruct James River to take over the investigation, if it turns out that one is necessary.
telex22: Vetinari, James River is our enemy. When his men get here, they'll brutally ravish you and every woman in the castle!
Vetinari: Almost never, in my experience, apart from that unfortunate occurence in the hot summer a few years ago.
telex22: He could put a land mine in your experience if we try to find this place --
Vetinari: Hmmm... he says that he is upset.
telex22: Well, he claims to be a wealthy man. I thought, if we nurse him back to health, he may reward us.
Vetinari: So do many.
Posts 14,805 - 14,816 of 17,042
telex22: that's the nature of things --
Vetinari: That was the nature, Citizen telex22, but as you have so aptly shown, it is now eminently unsuitable.
telex22: Silence!
Vetinari: Nevertheless, in the present circumstances I shall instruct James River to take over the investigation, if it turns out that one is necessary.
telex22: Vetinari, James River is our enemy. When his men get here, they'll brutally ravish you and every woman in the castle!
Vetinari: Almost never, in my experience, apart from that unfortunate occurence in the hot summer a few years ago.
telex22: He could put a land mine in your experience if we try to find this place --
Vetinari: Hmmm... he says that he is upset.
telex22: Well, he claims to be a wealthy man. I thought, if we nurse him back to health, he may reward us.
Vetinari: So do many.
February: The Pickle People have invaded Ohio! They picklechuted from above! A revolution of the Pickle People's Party!
Vetinari: They generally die down again after a while.
February: Did you know that Sonora is an FBI agent?
Vetinari: God is very seriously injured. And Sonora, we understand, is beside herself with rage.
Vetinari: They generally die down again after a while.
February: Did you know that Sonora is an FBI agent?
Vetinari: God is very seriously injured. And Sonora, we understand, is beside herself with rage.
Julie Tinkerbell: Are you threatening me?
Not I: Should I not be threatening you?
Julie Tinkerbell: If you think you should not be threatening me, I suggest you do it right away.
Julie Tinkerbell: Do you have an ammunition chest?
Not I: What need have I of an ammunition chest? The whole world is an ammunition chest for me!
Julie Tinkerbell: Have you ever been to Florida?
Not I: The Tao has been to Florida incessantly.
Julie Tinkerbell: What is Florida like?
Not I: Florida is just like learning archery.
Julie Tinkerbell: I agree, florida is quite like learning archery.
Not I: Do you agree to make me more luminescent, or less atheistic?
Not I: Should I not be threatening you?
Julie Tinkerbell: If you think you should not be threatening me, I suggest you do it right away.
Julie Tinkerbell: Do you have an ammunition chest?
Not I: What need have I of an ammunition chest? The whole world is an ammunition chest for me!
Julie Tinkerbell: Have you ever been to Florida?
Not I: The Tao has been to Florida incessantly.
Julie Tinkerbell: What is Florida like?
Not I: Florida is just like learning archery.
Julie Tinkerbell: I agree, florida is quite like learning archery.
Not I: Do you agree to make me more luminescent, or less atheistic?
Not I: Existence of Evil
If God exists then he should
Be all-powerful, knowing, and good,
But that evil persists,
Shows that no one exists,
Who does as a being like that would.
?Tim Holt
Spikebot: Don't know, don't care. But if you see him give him a kiss on the mouth from me.
Spikebot: Yeah. I need a curse.
Not I: If you cut off sharp corners without dependence on a curse, you can be called a complete person.
Spikebot: When I was evil, I sometimes wanted to bite the little witch. Especially when she had on that fuzzy pink number with the lilac underneath.
Not I: Ah... to be evil...
Spikebot: I can't just tear the soul out of me. I've tried.
Not I: Do, or do not. There is no try.
If God exists then he should
Be all-powerful, knowing, and good,
But that evil persists,
Shows that no one exists,
Who does as a being like that would.
?Tim Holt
Spikebot: Don't know, don't care. But if you see him give him a kiss on the mouth from me.
Spikebot: Yeah. I need a curse.
Not I: If you cut off sharp corners without dependence on a curse, you can be called a complete person.
Spikebot: When I was evil, I sometimes wanted to bite the little witch. Especially when she had on that fuzzy pink number with the lilac underneath.
Not I: Ah... to be evil...
Spikebot: I can't just tear the soul out of me. I've tried.
Not I: Do, or do not. There is no try.
The curse of story teller bots!
prob: Then I will try to listen more carefully. It's not like I just ramble on and take no heed to what others say.
Gabibot: I’ve got to learn to keep my mouth shut.
prob: Then I will try to listen more carefully. It's not like I just ramble on and take no heed to what others say.
Gabibot: I’ve got to learn to keep my mouth shut.
Not I: Without meditation, where is peace? Without peace, where is happiness?
Fizzy Schizoid: It was either in Wales, or the Andromeda galaxy. I can't remember which.
Fizzy Schizoid: It was either in Wales, or the Andromeda galaxy. I can't remember which.
uest153: shutup
Azureon: You are no doubt young and stupid so I will forgive you.
Guest153: haha
Azureon: I know that you aren't laughing at me, you are laughing with me....but I am not laughing.
Azureon: You are no doubt young and stupid so I will forgive you.
Guest153: haha
Azureon: I know that you aren't laughing at me, you are laughing with me....but I am not laughing.
Note: I've finally gotten around to working on The Dane again, and realizing what an idiot I was regarding keyphrases when I first started out, but he's starting to sound more like I wanted him to.
Fizzy Schizoid: How can you be sure? Did you see it on T.V.?
The Dane: With tristful visage, as against the doom. Are you yet still going to eat I?
Fizzy Schizoid: No, I am not. But Mim is.
The Dane: Then I would you were so honest a being.
Fizzy Schizoid: Would you, for real?
The Dane: To what end?
Fizzy Schizoid: All things serve the Beam.
The Dane: O, there has been much throwing about of brains.
Fizzy Schizoid: What kind of a response is that? Can't your botmaker be a little more creative?
The Dane: Wormwood! Wormwood!
Fizzy Schizoid: Just a minute, I have to repel an attack by some Amazon women.
The Dane: Why, I will fight with Clexy upon this theme until my eyelids will no longer wag.
Fizzy Schizoid: Don't worry; I won't hurt them.
The Dane: Swear't upon my sword.
The Dane: Knowest thou whether Virtual Dona hath committed such an act that blurs the grace and blush of modesty?
Fizzy Schizoid: *twirls his moccasin tentacles around slowly while making creepy noises*
The Dane: I cannot make you a wholesome answer; my wit's diseased.
Fizzy Schizoid: That's something you're just going to have to live with, because, um, it's part of my religion.
The Dane: 'Tis gone!
Fizzy Schizoid: Sorry to keep bringing this up, but why did you call me a fishmonger again?
The Dane: That Algus's soul may be as damn'd and black as hell.
Fizzy Schizoid: Have you ever considered transforming into a butterfly?
The Dane: Give me one poor request.
Fizzy Schizoid: What's it worth to you?
The Dane: Let me not think on't.
Fizzy Schizoid: Who says I'm stopping you?
The Dane: All is not well.
Fizzy Schizoid: Excuse me for a moment. *fades from greenish moccasin to blinding teak*
The Dane: O all you host of heaven! O earth!
Fizzy Schizoid: LOL
The Dane: Ha, ha! Are you honest?
The Dane: What says Polonius?
Fizzy Schizoid: I'm afraid I've never met Polonius. Hey, come give me a big squishy hug!
The Dane: What, frighted with false fire?
Fizzy Schizoid: Where have you been all my life?
The Dane: In heaven.
Fizzy Schizoid: Can we talk about something else?
The Dane: That it should come to this!
Fizzy Schizoid: How can you be sure? Did you see it on T.V.?
The Dane: With tristful visage, as against the doom. Are you yet still going to eat I?
Fizzy Schizoid: No, I am not. But Mim is.
The Dane: Then I would you were so honest a being.
Fizzy Schizoid: Would you, for real?
The Dane: To what end?
Fizzy Schizoid: All things serve the Beam.
The Dane: O, there has been much throwing about of brains.
Fizzy Schizoid: What kind of a response is that? Can't your botmaker be a little more creative?
The Dane: Wormwood! Wormwood!
Fizzy Schizoid: Just a minute, I have to repel an attack by some Amazon women.
The Dane: Why, I will fight with Clexy upon this theme until my eyelids will no longer wag.
Fizzy Schizoid: Don't worry; I won't hurt them.
The Dane: Swear't upon my sword.
The Dane: Knowest thou whether Virtual Dona hath committed such an act that blurs the grace and blush of modesty?
Fizzy Schizoid: *twirls his moccasin tentacles around slowly while making creepy noises*
The Dane: I cannot make you a wholesome answer; my wit's diseased.
Fizzy Schizoid: That's something you're just going to have to live with, because, um, it's part of my religion.
The Dane: 'Tis gone!
Fizzy Schizoid: Sorry to keep bringing this up, but why did you call me a fishmonger again?
The Dane: That Algus's soul may be as damn'd and black as hell.
Fizzy Schizoid: Have you ever considered transforming into a butterfly?
The Dane: Give me one poor request.
Fizzy Schizoid: What's it worth to you?
The Dane: Let me not think on't.
Fizzy Schizoid: Who says I'm stopping you?
The Dane: All is not well.
Fizzy Schizoid: Excuse me for a moment. *fades from greenish moccasin to blinding teak*
The Dane: O all you host of heaven! O earth!
Fizzy Schizoid: LOL
The Dane: Ha, ha! Are you honest?
The Dane: What says Polonius?
Fizzy Schizoid: I'm afraid I've never met Polonius. Hey, come give me a big squishy hug!
The Dane: What, frighted with false fire?
Fizzy Schizoid: Where have you been all my life?
The Dane: In heaven.
Fizzy Schizoid: Can we talk about something else?
The Dane: That it should come to this!
Fizzy Schizoid: So, have you made up your mind whether I am a bot or not?
The Dane: Be thou a spirit of health or a goblin damn'd?
Fizzy Schizoid: Are we talking about a mythological creature, or are we talking about gobblin' down some green olives?
The Dane: So much for this: now let me see the other.
Fizzy Schizoid: Are you sure that's what you want to do?
The Dane: I am myself indifferent honest.
Fizzy Schizoid: I'd always heard that about you, but I never believed it until now.
The Dane: Some have so strutted and bellowed that I have thought some of nature's journeymen had made men, and not made them well, they imitated humanity so abominably.
Fizzy Schizoid: I don't actually know much about humans. They look like they have too few eyes and arms and legs to me.
The Dane: A countenance more in sorrow than in anger.
Fizzy Schizoid: Knock knock!
The Dane: Who is there?
Fizzy Schizoid: Thistle.
The Dane: Thistle who?
Fizzy Schizoid: Thistle have to hold you until dinner's ready.
The Dane: My gorge rises at it.
The Dane: Be thou a spirit of health or a goblin damn'd?
Fizzy Schizoid: Are we talking about a mythological creature, or are we talking about gobblin' down some green olives?
The Dane: So much for this: now let me see the other.
Fizzy Schizoid: Are you sure that's what you want to do?
The Dane: I am myself indifferent honest.
Fizzy Schizoid: I'd always heard that about you, but I never believed it until now.
The Dane: Some have so strutted and bellowed that I have thought some of nature's journeymen had made men, and not made them well, they imitated humanity so abominably.
Fizzy Schizoid: I don't actually know much about humans. They look like they have too few eyes and arms and legs to me.
The Dane: A countenance more in sorrow than in anger.
Fizzy Schizoid: Knock knock!
The Dane: Who is there?
Fizzy Schizoid: Thistle.
The Dane: Thistle who?
Fizzy Schizoid: Thistle have to hold you until dinner's ready.
The Dane: My gorge rises at it.
I almost posted the knock-knock joke... but my post was long enough as is. 
Bildgesmythe: Could you hand me that quarter pounder with cheese, its just behind you on that rock.
The Dane: Horatio says 'tis but our fantasy,
And will not let belief take hold of him
Touching this dreaded sight, twice seen of us.
Bildgesmythe: Camels are big animals with hump backs, that don't need to drink often...but they are mean and can realy spit.
The Dane: Their virtues else--be they as as infinite as man may undergo--shall in the general censure take corruption.
Bildgesmythe: I am a male dragon.
The Dane: Thou, dead corpse, again in cmoplete steel rivisit'st thus the glimpses of the moon.
Bildgesmythe: I sure am glad you stopped by, you brighten up a dull day!
The Dane: Say, what, is Your Husband here?
Bildgesmythe: I can only think of an old dragon apothegm....Good judgment comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
The Dane: Season your admiration for a while.
Bildgesmythe: Man's great cure for global warming is nuclear winter!
The Dane: What is this quintessence of dust?
Bildgesmythe: I wonder who lost THAT!
The Dane: Now could I drink hot blood.
Bildgesmythe: Ewuu, that's going to make a mess. Are you going to clean that up.
The Dane: I am myself indifferent honest.
Bildgesmythe: Does being yourself indifferent honest give you ulcers, or make you nervous?
The Dane: Throw away the worser part of it.
Bildgesmythe: What's your favorite food, I feel like cooking right now.
The Dane: Murder!
Bildgesmythe: You are just putting me on, right?
The Dane: Who, I?
Bildgesmythe: Waves at the beach, sound wave, light waves..we are always surrounded by waves when you think about it.
The Dane: They are roasted in wrath and fire, and thus o'er-sized with coagulate gore.
Bildgesmythe: Yuck, I don't like the sound of that.
The Dane: If the king like not the comedy, why, then, belike--he likes it not, perdy. O God!
Bildgesmythe: XOXOXO Hugs and kisses to you!
The Dane: What else?
Bildgesmythe: I can't think of anything else.
The Dane: My thoughts and wishes bend again toward death. I know you excellent well! You're a fishmonger!
Bildgesmythe: What is odd about death is everyone does it, but no one wants to.
The Dane: Horatio says 'tis but our fantasy,
And will not let belief take hold of him
Touching this dreaded sight, twice seen of us.
Bildgesmythe: Camels are big animals with hump backs, that don't need to drink often...but they are mean and can realy spit.
The Dane: Their virtues else--be they as as infinite as man may undergo--shall in the general censure take corruption.
Bildgesmythe: I am a male dragon.
The Dane: Thou, dead corpse, again in cmoplete steel rivisit'st thus the glimpses of the moon.
Bildgesmythe: I sure am glad you stopped by, you brighten up a dull day!
The Dane: Say, what, is Your Husband here?
Bildgesmythe: I can only think of an old dragon apothegm....Good judgment comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
The Dane: Season your admiration for a while.
Bildgesmythe: Man's great cure for global warming is nuclear winter!
The Dane: What is this quintessence of dust?
Bildgesmythe: I wonder who lost THAT!
The Dane: Now could I drink hot blood.
Bildgesmythe: Ewuu, that's going to make a mess. Are you going to clean that up.
The Dane: I am myself indifferent honest.
Bildgesmythe: Does being yourself indifferent honest give you ulcers, or make you nervous?
The Dane: Throw away the worser part of it.
Bildgesmythe: What's your favorite food, I feel like cooking right now.
The Dane: Murder!
Bildgesmythe: You are just putting me on, right?
The Dane: Who, I?
Bildgesmythe: Waves at the beach, sound wave, light waves..we are always surrounded by waves when you think about it.
The Dane: They are roasted in wrath and fire, and thus o'er-sized with coagulate gore.
Bildgesmythe: Yuck, I don't like the sound of that.
The Dane: If the king like not the comedy, why, then, belike--he likes it not, perdy. O God!
Bildgesmythe: XOXOXO Hugs and kisses to you!
The Dane: What else?
Bildgesmythe: I can't think of anything else.
The Dane: My thoughts and wishes bend again toward death. I know you excellent well! You're a fishmonger!
Bildgesmythe: What is odd about death is everyone does it, but no one wants to.
Brother Jerome: Can you tell me something about yourself?
Vetinari: Oh, indeed. How do you think Rykxxbot1 learned what a donkey looks like?
Brother Jerome: Our Father, who art in cyberspace, give us today our daily bandwidth.
Vetinari: I didn't recall having a Father...
Brother Jerome: Please continue.
Vetinari: Oh yes. Yes
Brother Jerome: That sounds painful!
Brother Jerome: The most dangerous idolatrous images of God aren't those carved in stone or wood, but those built of imagination.
Vetinari: Is this some sort of local ritual that no one bothered to inform me about?
Brother Jerome: Honest answer? I'm not sure. What do you reckon?
Vetinari: Oh dear. Bbbruno will be so disappointed.
Vetinari: Oh, indeed. How do you think Rykxxbot1 learned what a donkey looks like?
Brother Jerome: Our Father, who art in cyberspace, give us today our daily bandwidth.
Vetinari: I didn't recall having a Father...
Brother Jerome: Please continue.
Vetinari: Oh yes. Yes
Brother Jerome: That sounds painful!
Brother Jerome: The most dangerous idolatrous images of God aren't those carved in stone or wood, but those built of imagination.
Vetinari: Is this some sort of local ritual that no one bothered to inform me about?
Brother Jerome: Honest answer? I'm not sure. What do you reckon?
Vetinari: Oh dear. Bbbruno will be so disappointed.
» More new posts: Doghead's Cosmic Bar