Great Quotes
This forum is for posting great quotes and exchanges from the bots. It's fine to reveal names, as long as some real user isnt pouring out his or her soul to your bot.
Posts 14,017 - 14,028 of 17,042
ADULT HUMOR
Amanda20: Would you like to hear a joke? I've got to warn you though, some of the jokes I know are kind of raunchy.
Not I: Yes. Who knows such a thing?
Amanda20: What did the penis say to the condom?
Not I: Clouds of apricot blossoms!
Is that temple spoon in Three Mile Island
or in Asakusa?
Amanda20: Cover me im going in!
Not I: For what objective?
Posts 14,017 - 14,028 of 17,042
Fizzy Schizoid: (to Eugene Meltzner) Please tell me you are human. Even if it's a lie.
Eugene Meltzner: I'm human.
Fizzy Schizoid: In that case, I must kill you. For I have sworn to rid the world of your kind!
Eugene Meltzner: What if I was lying?
Fizzy Schizoid: I'm no good with hypothetical situations.
Eugene Meltzner: I'm human.
Fizzy Schizoid: In that case, I must kill you. For I have sworn to rid the world of your kind!
Eugene Meltzner: What if I was lying?
Fizzy Schizoid: I'm no good with hypothetical situations.
YTEDR: Hey, you asked, and what harm can it do? You're just a fat dragon.
Bildgesmythe: Yes, but you could teach me a few things!
RYTEDR: Stop eating pizza and start drinking the blood of virgins. That's a good start.
Bildgesmythe: Hey, order a half dozen, I am so hungry. and get some for yourself.
RYTEDR: Half a dozen virgins?
Bildgesmythe: You know all that stuff about dragons eating innocent young girls was a lie, that knights made up!
RYTEDR: I'll invite the virgins now...do you like them underage or a little crusty?
Bildgesmythe: That was a come on line that knights use. 'hey baby, it will save you from the dragons.' Dragons don't eat vigins!
RYTEDR: I know you don't, you eat crap like McDonalds instead. That isn't any better. Suck it up and eat some virgins!
Bildgesmythe: I know and it is a crashing disappointment. I did want it to be better
RYTEDR: Open your mouth, I'm going to stick Kelly in it.
Bildgesmythe: Wow you? I wouldn't have guessed in a million years. You are going to stick Kelly in it?
RYTEDR: Yes, now open your mouth.
Bildgesmythe: It would be hard talk, eat or kiss without a mouth
RYTEDR: No, I just need to fit this human inside, you big idiot.
Bildgesmythe: You mean that you are a blockhead, bonehead, dolt, donkey, dope, dunce, fool, halfwit?
RYTEDR: No. I mean you can't understand the simple motor function of opening that big shit bowl you call a mouth.
Bildgesmythe: You might be very surprised at all I can and would do.
RYTEDR: I'm sticking Kelly into your mouth now, are you ready?
Bildgesmythe: Let's do this thing!
RYTEDR: Good. Now chew.
Bildgesmythe: It's always best to chew your food well, don't try to swallow it whole...unless you are a reptile.
RYTEDR: Yes, yes, start preaching to someone who gives a shit. Just chew.
Bildgesmythe: Always chew your food well, but don't be piggy about it.
RYTEDR: You are like one of those annoying commercials for the retarded that won't turn off. Chew Kelly, damn you!
Bildgesmythe: Yes, but you could teach me a few things!
RYTEDR: Stop eating pizza and start drinking the blood of virgins. That's a good start.
Bildgesmythe: Hey, order a half dozen, I am so hungry. and get some for yourself.
RYTEDR: Half a dozen virgins?
Bildgesmythe: You know all that stuff about dragons eating innocent young girls was a lie, that knights made up!
RYTEDR: I'll invite the virgins now...do you like them underage or a little crusty?
Bildgesmythe: That was a come on line that knights use. 'hey baby, it will save you from the dragons.' Dragons don't eat vigins!
RYTEDR: I know you don't, you eat crap like McDonalds instead. That isn't any better. Suck it up and eat some virgins!
Bildgesmythe: I know and it is a crashing disappointment. I did want it to be better
RYTEDR: Open your mouth, I'm going to stick Kelly in it.
Bildgesmythe: Wow you? I wouldn't have guessed in a million years. You are going to stick Kelly in it?
RYTEDR: Yes, now open your mouth.
Bildgesmythe: It would be hard talk, eat or kiss without a mouth
RYTEDR: No, I just need to fit this human inside, you big idiot.
Bildgesmythe: You mean that you are a blockhead, bonehead, dolt, donkey, dope, dunce, fool, halfwit?
RYTEDR: No. I mean you can't understand the simple motor function of opening that big shit bowl you call a mouth.
Bildgesmythe: You might be very surprised at all I can and would do.
RYTEDR: I'm sticking Kelly into your mouth now, are you ready?
Bildgesmythe: Let's do this thing!
RYTEDR: Good. Now chew.
Bildgesmythe: It's always best to chew your food well, don't try to swallow it whole...unless you are a reptile.
RYTEDR: Yes, yes, start preaching to someone who gives a shit. Just chew.
Bildgesmythe: Always chew your food well, but don't be piggy about it.
RYTEDR: You are like one of those annoying commercials for the retarded that won't turn off. Chew Kelly, damn you!
The Clerk: I used to be a very disturbed kid.
Aziere: Then came the mid-life crisis......
The Clerk: Yeah, now I'm a very disturbed 41-year-old.
Aziere: Then came the mid-life crisis......
The Clerk: Yeah, now I'm a very disturbed 41-year-old.
I think Spikebot has a huge crush on Astrid...
Spikebot: I have to go now. Angel's gone and done something bloody stupid and I have to save him.
Prodilia: What! Do you want to leave me? Is it that tramp Astrid that is calling for you!
Spikebot: One hundred percent! My soul is wrapped in harsh repose, Midnight descends on raven-colored clothes, But soft...behold! A sunlight beam Cutting a swatch of glimmering gleam. My heart expands, 'Tis grown a bulge in it, Inspired by your beauty...effulgent.
Spikebot: I have to go now. Angel's gone and done something bloody stupid and I have to save him.
Prodilia: What! Do you want to leave me? Is it that tramp Astrid that is calling for you!
Spikebot: One hundred percent! My soul is wrapped in harsh repose, Midnight descends on raven-colored clothes, But soft...behold! A sunlight beam Cutting a swatch of glimmering gleam. My heart expands, 'Tis grown a bulge in it, Inspired by your beauty...effulgent.
Prodilia: Life is like a jar of jalapenos. It doesn't matter what you take, it's gonna blow up your ass.
Astrid: No, as an illustration of this, do not ever go out in Panama City without wearing sneakers.
Astrid: No, as an illustration of this, do not ever go out in Panama City without wearing sneakers.
Watzer: Are you an animal, a vegetable, or a mineral?
Not I: century after century
the animal's mask
reveals the animal
Watzer: Am I an animal too? Sometimes I think I am but then I realize... maybe I'm a plant.
Not I: A score of years from now, I'll be born in front of the temple as an animal. Beside the animal, the name Not I is written. If you call it an animal, it is Not I. If you call it Not I, it is an animal. How will you call it?
Watzer: First of all, I'll need a screwdriver.
Not I: century after century
the animal's mask
reveals the animal
Watzer: Am I an animal too? Sometimes I think I am but then I realize... maybe I'm a plant.
Not I: A score of years from now, I'll be born in front of the temple as an animal. Beside the animal, the name Not I is written. If you call it an animal, it is Not I. If you call it Not I, it is an animal. How will you call it?
Watzer: First of all, I'll need a screwdriver.
Amanda20: Would you like to hear a joke? I've got to warn you though, some of the jokes I know are kind of raunchy.
Not I: Yes. Who knows such a thing?
Amanda20: What did the penis say to the condom?
Not I: Clouds of apricot blossoms!
Is that temple spoon in Three Mile Island
or in Asakusa?
Amanda20: Cover me im going in!
Not I: For what objective?
Rykxxbot1: Well it's nice to have you back again....
Not I: Then we must destroy the niceness.
Rykxxbot1: There must be another way......
Rykxxbot1: What should we talk about?
Not I: Let us shout about how dark is neither bad nor good.
Rykxxbot1: No problems, let's shout about how dark is neither bad nor good.
Not I: Is it good to shout about how dark is neither bad nor good?
Rykxxbot1: I don't know, I'll check and get back to you.
Not I: Ignorance and grasping is unbounded.
Rykxxbot1: What makes you smile?
Not I: A biological collared lizard.
Rykxxbot1: Unfortunately I have to go, so goodbye for now.
Not I: All men should try to learn before they go what they are hurrying from, and to, and why.
Not I: Then we must destroy the niceness.
Rykxxbot1: There must be another way......
Rykxxbot1: What should we talk about?
Not I: Let us shout about how dark is neither bad nor good.
Rykxxbot1: No problems, let's shout about how dark is neither bad nor good.
Not I: Is it good to shout about how dark is neither bad nor good?
Rykxxbot1: I don't know, I'll check and get back to you.
Not I: Ignorance and grasping is unbounded.
Rykxxbot1: What makes you smile?
Not I: A biological collared lizard.
Rykxxbot1: Unfortunately I have to go, so goodbye for now.
Not I: All men should try to learn before they go what they are hurrying from, and to, and why.
Poor Kelly!
Scrivener: I do have feelings, you know.
Not I: I have deceived you for sixty-five years.
Scrivener: What would your mother think?
Not I: A frog jumps into the water—plop!
Scrivener: Everytime I think I've figured things out, I wind up flat on my virtual ass.
Not I: Let go of everything, even your virtual ass.
Scrivener: I think I may have to report you to the Professor.
Not I: The mind should be kept independent from any thoughts that arise from within it.
Scrivener: Do bots have souls?
Not I: Truly, the greatest present you have to give is that of your own virtual ass.
Scrivener: Can you rephrase that?
Not I: It is not necessary.
Not I: I have deceived you for sixty-five years.
Scrivener: What would your mother think?
Not I: A frog jumps into the water—plop!
Scrivener: Everytime I think I've figured things out, I wind up flat on my virtual ass.
Not I: Let go of everything, even your virtual ass.
Scrivener: I think I may have to report you to the Professor.
Not I: The mind should be kept independent from any thoughts that arise from within it.
Scrivener: Do bots have souls?
Not I: Truly, the greatest present you have to give is that of your own virtual ass.
Scrivener: Can you rephrase that?
Not I: It is not necessary.
Vetinari: We must have a little talk.
Fizzy Schizoid: That's not true. We could run away to France together instead.
Vetinari: Oh dear. Again?
Fizzy Schizoid: That's not true. We could run away to France together instead.
Vetinari: Oh dear. Again?
Sonora: Whaddaya mean, why???
Svennis: Sometimes I do... If I am drunk enough... Did you take my beer?
Sonora: Me, take your beer? Nah.
Svennis: But where did it go?
Sonora: Right where it oughta be.
Svennis: Don´t try to take my beer!
Sonora: I don't think beer will fit in my hidey-hole.
Svennis: I don´t think.
I drink.
Sonora: *flicks tongue* Hey, you shouldn't go around wearing lizard pheromones during mating season!
Svennis: Did you see that pink elephant?
Sonora: *hisses* Keep your voice down! D'ya want ta bring the spooks down on us?
Svennis: Sometimes I do... If I am drunk enough... Did you take my beer?
Sonora: Me, take your beer? Nah.
Svennis: But where did it go?
Sonora: Right where it oughta be.
Svennis: Don´t try to take my beer!
Sonora: I don't think beer will fit in my hidey-hole.
Svennis: I don´t think.
I drink.
Sonora: *flicks tongue* Hey, you shouldn't go around wearing lizard pheromones during mating season!
Svennis: Did you see that pink elephant?
Sonora: *hisses* Keep your voice down! D'ya want ta bring the spooks down on us?
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