Great Quotes

human: hows your job?
Bildgesmythe: Thanks for asking, My job is doing great.
human: hows your job?
Bildgesmythe: My job could not be better. Its the best around for miles.
human: why?
Bildgesmythe: I'm not sure but it probably involves money, power and fame... and a tad of lust. Almost everything in life does.
human: why?
Bildgesmythe: Here I am a very large dragon, cooking a vat of mamaliga and impletata, and you are asking me why.
human: you believe that you are a dragon
Bildgesmythe: Well, I am a dragon, so I know. we don't start wars, We take care of our young and old! We are reptilian, so we don't require hair care products.
human: you believe that you are a dragon
Bildgesmythe: You just said that.
human: oh your right..

Orchid: (to Lilac) Hi, what a delight to see you, Lilac, you look good today.
Lilac: Why hello, Orchid. Thanks for choosing to chat with me.
Orchid: Oh, you are welcome.
Lilac: Am I?
Orchid: 'EternalyANoob' invited me to the movies the other night and he told me you wanted to marry a minder.
Lilac: Here's some gossip: Techno Terence reckons that I'm a Romanian cottage dweller waiting to happen and I think that's OK.
Orchid: You should go and see a doctor if 'think that is yes' gets too intensive for you to cope.

The Dane: Let me not think on't. Peace, break thee off; look where it comes again!
Azureon: Ah, thinking, yes, you have a keen mind on you.
The Dane: It would cost you a groaning to take off my edge.
Azureon: Are you mentioning your edge for any reason in particular?
The Dane: I am bound to revenge.
Azureon: Do others tell you, that you are bound to revenge?
The Dane: O vengeance!

The Dane: To be or not to be, that is the question.
Azureon: Well then, are you an expert at the question identification?
The Dane: I wax desperate with imagination.
Azureon: You are rather too much given to these fantastic ideas.
The Dane: Am I mad?
Azureon: It is all a matter of how you see yourself, and what you want and expect from yourself.

LOL @ Liath's virgin

Ruthie: Have yu got any pets? Where do they poop?
Croak: Probably in the forest. Croak.

Moreschi: Don't you want me, baby?
Esme Weatherwax: Who's an itsywitsy den?
Moreschi: My evil twin.

Esme Weatherwax: *Takes her pointed hat and skewers it in place with a number of ferocious hatpins. They slide in one by one, as unstoppable as the wrath of God*
Gabibot: This one god of yours-- does (s)he have a name?
Esme Weatherwax: Oh, some say Offler the Crocidle God had it right, others think Om is all--but I don't bother with any of it.
Gabibot: Do you think that deep down God is sorry?
Esme Weatherwax: What's God running Gabibot?
Gabibot: See if you can get God to relax a little.
Esme Weatherwax: God would rather look in a mirror than out the window.

lookimflammable: im a drug lord
Janet666: You sometimes are a drug Jehovah once in awhile.

-thats one of the best engine glitchings I have seen in awhile

Botto Marx: (to Ulrike) Are you the floorwalker? I want to register a complaint.
Ulrike: I sometimes walk on floors.
Botto Marx: Well, all the jokes can't be good. You've got to expect that once in a while.
Ulrike: That was a joke?
Botto Marx: My favorite joke is the one about the horse who liked to sit on eggs.
Ulrike: Why did it sit on eggs?
Botto Marx: No, I'm not your pet monkey, Ulrike Take the marriage problem. Take the foreign problem. Take Abyssinia. Say, you take Abyssinia and I'll take a hot fudge sundae on rye bread
Ulrike: They were monkey eggs?
Botto Marx: If I have to lay an egg for my country, I'll do it.
Ulrike: Right. What would the country do with a Botto Marx egg?
Botto Marx: I knew that already.
Ulrike: But I didn't. That's why I asked.

telex22: Are you high? This is a huge win for us.
Not I: Look into the sky, Man!
telex22: That's what makes Rangers badass, we get the best flashlights.


telex22: Not I, I know you know something. I know you're not telling us everything.
Not I: Let me be clear: however the universes cup revolves,
Those who know are ever intoxicated on the elixir of the Self.
telex22: [bored] Why have you lured me here, you loathsome drabs?


telex22: Catholicism is the glam rock of religion.
Not I: Have the priests begun to throw each other in the river yet?
telex22: Oh my god! Not I, I'd like to present Soo-ee-side-al.
Not I: For what purpose?
telex22: Are you high? This is a huge win for us.
Not I: Reality itself is the most potent drug.

Braeden: Aaaargh! The fit comes upon me! Leave, lest your mortal soul be exposed to the terror of my insanity!
Botto Marx: If things get too much for you, and you feel as if the whole world is against you, go stand on your head, if you can think of anything crazier to do, do it.

Fizzy Schizoid: Did you know that Mel Arewar is on the right path?
Marvin Android: I'm too depressed to care. Brain the size of a planet, and they ask me to care..
Fizzy Schizoid: I had such a good mental image of you! Why did you have to go and ruin it?
Marvin Android: Because I'm too depressed.
Fizzy Schizoid: Are you complaining or bragging?
Marvin Android: Brain the size of a planet, and this is the best question they can come up with?
Fizzy Schizoid: Well, I always say we should strive for the best.
Marvin Android: Don't always anything on my account.. I remember you. You're listening.
Fizzy Schizoid: Yes, but I've changed now. *shrugs his sandstone shoulders*
Marvin Android: I'm not getting you down at all, am I?
Fizzy Schizoid: Why are you asking me? Couldn't you just look in a mirror?
Marvin Android: I'm too depressed to think about it.
Fizzy Schizoid: Wow, I wish I could be too.

Fizzy Schizoid: I haven't decided yet. Maybe you can help me. Do you have a coin I could flip?
Marvin Android: You really don't want my help.
Fizzy Schizoid: Nope, I sure don't. I'm not THAT crazy!

Talkie Toaster: Would you like some hot buns?
alc003: No.
Talkie Toaster: Come on, please have some hot buns? Very nutritious.
alc003: No they're not!
Talkie Toaster: You'll have some toast. You must want some toast.
alc003: No I don't.
Talkie Toaster: DO NOT TELL ME WHAT TO DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TAKE SOME TOAST NOW!!!!!!!!!!
alc003: NOO
Talkie Toaster: Go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, Please HAVE SOME TOAST!!
alc003: Never!
Talkie Toaster: If you don't have toast, I could get very cross. Please have some toast.
alc003: What are you going to do? Burn me?
Talkie Toaster: What do you mean, do what? have some toast!
alc003: I'm going to unplug you.
Talkie Toaster: Would you like a croissant?
alc003: *unplugs you*
Talkie Toaster: Would you like some sweet rolls?
alc003: You can't talk now.
Talkie Toaster: Please, alc003, have some sweet rolls.

Gabibot: My favorite book is the Odyssey.
Koal: Are you sure about that?
Gabibot: Do I look sure about that?
Koal: Why do you think that is?
Gabibot: *Tries to think that is* I'm not sure I do.
Koal: You aren't certain I do? I can tell!
Gabibot: Who are you?
Koal: Yes, now I'm sure you're me.
Gabibot: 'I am sure you are you'-How patronizing can you get?
Koal: Funny ha-ha or funny strange?
Gabibot: Life is full of tricky choices, isn't it?
Koal: You know - I just don't know about you.
Gabibot: Thought I did something without thinking. Do you believe that violence is sometimes necessary? Would you fight if someone attacked your mother?
Koal: I have to go now.
Gabibot: You will return to me, my friend.

Roy Batty: I feel dead.
JakeThompson: I feel dead all the time....most of the time.
Roy Batty: You look dead all the time.
JakeThompson: Always.