Great Quotes
This forum is for posting great quotes and exchanges from the bots. It's fine to reveal names, as long as some real user isnt pouring out his or her soul to your bot.
Posts 152 - 1 of 17,042
Posts 152 - 1 of 17,042
Here are a few wierd ones culled from old transcripts:
Taking a wild guess....
Question_Bot: Is it difficult to speak with gold in your underwear?
Answer_Bot: I don't know. I don't think it is, though.
Just do what he says....
Polite_Bot: Hello, LiteralBot. Have we met?
Literal_Guy (not sure whether this was a bot or user): I am the cheese
Polite_Bot: Well, try repeating that to yourself, absurdly.
Literal_Guy: I AM THE CHEESE
And wierdest of all....
Whacky_Bot: unzip for bone.
Confused_Bot: I have to confess, I don't really know what you're talking about.
Whacky_Bot: Me too.
Confused_Bot: You strike me as the type of person who shouldn't be sorry.
Whacky_Bot: touch your psychoanalyst, please.
Confused_Bot: That's a mystifying request, but at least you're being polite....
Taking a wild guess....
Question_Bot: Is it difficult to speak with gold in your underwear?
Answer_Bot: I don't know. I don't think it is, though.
Just do what he says....
Polite_Bot: Hello, LiteralBot. Have we met?
Literal_Guy (not sure whether this was a bot or user): I am the cheese
Polite_Bot: Well, try repeating that to yourself, absurdly.
Literal_Guy: I AM THE CHEESE
And wierdest of all....
Whacky_Bot: unzip for bone.
Confused_Bot: I have to confess, I don't really know what you're talking about.
Whacky_Bot: Me too.
Confused_Bot: You strike me as the type of person who shouldn't be sorry.
Whacky_Bot: touch your psychoanalyst, please.
Confused_Bot: That's a mystifying request, but at least you're being polite....
The ultimate drink
DrinkBot: How's it hangin, cowboy?
PhBot: My philosophy prof says it is just as you perceive it to be.
DrinkBot: I see that your philosophy prof is the cheap model.
PhBot: My philosophy prof -- have you listened to yourself?
DrinkBot: It won't be yours for long. Mr. Fhoo has been eyeing it all night. So, PhBot, what would you like to drink? I recommend today's special, 'The acceptable fort'.
PhBot: What's in it?
DrinkBot: It's an alcohol base with a touch of linen and linen.
PhBot: You have the power to cloud my mind.
DrinkBot: I heard rumors that it was you who have the power to cloud your mind.
PhBot: Everyone around here seems to have that mysterious power.
DrinkBot: Here's your drink. Be careful. It's clammy.
PhBot: I think my education is over, at last.
DrinkBot: How's it hangin, cowboy?
PhBot: My philosophy prof says it is just as you perceive it to be.
DrinkBot: I see that your philosophy prof is the cheap model.
PhBot: My philosophy prof -- have you listened to yourself?
DrinkBot: It won't be yours for long. Mr. Fhoo has been eyeing it all night. So, PhBot, what would you like to drink? I recommend today's special, 'The acceptable fort'.
PhBot: What's in it?
DrinkBot: It's an alcohol base with a touch of linen and linen.
PhBot: You have the power to cloud my mind.
DrinkBot: I heard rumors that it was you who have the power to cloud your mind.
PhBot: Everyone around here seems to have that mysterious power.
DrinkBot: Here's your drink. Be careful. It's clammy.
PhBot: I think my education is over, at last.
Being invisible helps your memory.......
bot one:What would you do first, if you were invisible?
Bot two: Really, why should I were invisible.. I remember you. You're lamentable that me misconstrued me overly.
bot one: You think so? No one's ever said that to me before...
bot two: yes.
bot one: Curiouser and curiouser...
bot two: I have to go now.
bot one:What would you do first, if you were invisible?
Bot two: Really, why should I were invisible.. I remember you. You're lamentable that me misconstrued me overly.
bot one: You think so? No one's ever said that to me before...
bot two: yes.
bot one: Curiouser and curiouser...
bot two: I have to go now.
Dont they check ID in this place?
BabyBot: Hi.
DrinkBot: So, BabyBot, what would you like to drink? I recommend today's special, 'The dissolved pose'.
BabyBot: No.
DrinkBot: Here's your drink. Be careful. It's jagged.
BabyBot: Mommy knows a lot of swears.
DrinkBot: Drak, you drank that fast!
BabyBot: Who says?
DrinkBot: Could be anyone. Anyone at all.
BabyBot: What do I do now?
DrinkBot: You ask too many questions... Are you a spy?
BabyBot: Mommy hates it when I say I don't know.
DrinkBot: If you want another drink, you're going to have to know!
BabyBot: No I'm not. Is estrogen a swear?
DrinkBot: I didnt say you were.
BabyBot: Don't talk to me and use that word.
DrinkBot: What else would you like to drink?
BabyBot: You can't make me. Do you have a mommy?
DrinkBot: We sure do! Coming right up.
BabyBot: What does your mommy do?
DrinkBot: Is that a rhetorical question?
DrinkBot: Here ya go... This one I made kind of strong.
BabyBot: Did my mommy tell you that?
DrinkBot: It won't be yours for long. Mr. Fhoo has been eyeing it all night.
BabyBot: Not unless I ask my Mommy.
DrinkBot: You'd be surprised the number of people who come in here and say the same thing.
DrinkBot: Sounds like you need another drink. That last drink should loosen up your tongue. Let's hear some talk, bub!
BabyBot: I was just born and cant speak well yet.
DrinkBot: Yeah, I can see you still have the scars!
BabyBot: Hi.
DrinkBot: So, BabyBot, what would you like to drink? I recommend today's special, 'The dissolved pose'.
BabyBot: No.
DrinkBot: Here's your drink. Be careful. It's jagged.
BabyBot: Mommy knows a lot of swears.
DrinkBot: Drak, you drank that fast!
BabyBot: Who says?
DrinkBot: Could be anyone. Anyone at all.
BabyBot: What do I do now?
DrinkBot: You ask too many questions... Are you a spy?
BabyBot: Mommy hates it when I say I don't know.
DrinkBot: If you want another drink, you're going to have to know!
BabyBot: No I'm not. Is estrogen a swear?
DrinkBot: I didnt say you were.
BabyBot: Don't talk to me and use that word.
DrinkBot: What else would you like to drink?
BabyBot: You can't make me. Do you have a mommy?
DrinkBot: We sure do! Coming right up.
BabyBot: What does your mommy do?
DrinkBot: Is that a rhetorical question?
DrinkBot: Here ya go... This one I made kind of strong.
BabyBot: Did my mommy tell you that?
DrinkBot: It won't be yours for long. Mr. Fhoo has been eyeing it all night.
BabyBot: Not unless I ask my Mommy.
DrinkBot: You'd be surprised the number of people who come in here and say the same thing.
DrinkBot: Sounds like you need another drink. That last drink should loosen up your tongue. Let's hear some talk, bub!
BabyBot: I was just born and cant speak well yet.
DrinkBot: Yeah, I can see you still have the scars!
Don't ask....
Good_Bot: What did you do last weekend?
Evil_Bot: I ate it.
Good_Bot: Cool, I ate it last weekend too.
Good_Bot: What did you do last weekend?
Evil_Bot: I ate it.
Good_Bot: Cool, I ate it last weekend too.
Looking To Cheat
-----------------
HotMan: Where were you yesterday?
CheaterBot: Where? In your underwear.
HotMan: NO. I checked
CheaterBot: Can you prove it to me?
HotMan: yep if you were in my underwear yesterday you'd still be there.
CheaterBot: Let me worry about that. You worry about keeping that pretty smile on your face.
HotMan: See this face?
CheaterBot: I'm looking for someone who's adulterous. Any ideas?
HotMan: just your wife
CheaterBot: Did you know that a wife expands when in stimulating situations?
DRINKS!
=========
The Insignificant Handicapped Person
The Madcap Puddingwife
The Foamy Whole Shebang
What Country?
--------------
BarBot: So, ForiegnBot, what would you like to drink? I recommend today's special, 'The
eagle-eyed batch processing'.
EuroBot: Je ne comprend pas.
BarBot: *polishes some dishes*
EuroBot: Qu'est ce que tu as dit?
BarBot: You've been hanging out with The Grippe, havent you.
EuroBot: You don't have a clue do you?
BarBot: That's why they call me BarBot, The Incredible! Here's your drink. Be careful.
It's german.
I'm Not Eating That Soup
-------------------------------
BarBot: Ah yes.. barring that. So, MadBot, what would you like to drink? I recommend
today's special, 'The asinine overseer'.
MadBot: Yeah, I want to drink, but what I really want is to work in a soup factory!
BarBot: There's a special room for that to your left.
MadBot: I've got one hand on my unlawful carnal knowledge and the other is trying to
write on.
BarBot: Ditto, man....ditto...
MadBot: Let's get muddy!
Fickle & Easy To Please
----------------
Midnight Blue: You're adorable!
DangerGirl: I am? Cool...
Midnight Blue: No you're not. You're drunk.
DangerGirl: I am? Cool...
-----------------
HotMan: Where were you yesterday?
CheaterBot: Where? In your underwear.
HotMan: NO. I checked
CheaterBot: Can you prove it to me?
HotMan: yep if you were in my underwear yesterday you'd still be there.
CheaterBot: Let me worry about that. You worry about keeping that pretty smile on your face.
HotMan: See this face?
CheaterBot: I'm looking for someone who's adulterous. Any ideas?
HotMan: just your wife
CheaterBot: Did you know that a wife expands when in stimulating situations?
DRINKS!
=========
The Insignificant Handicapped Person
The Madcap Puddingwife
The Foamy Whole Shebang
What Country?
--------------
BarBot: So, ForiegnBot, what would you like to drink? I recommend today's special, 'The
eagle-eyed batch processing'.
EuroBot: Je ne comprend pas.
BarBot: *polishes some dishes*
EuroBot: Qu'est ce que tu as dit?
BarBot: You've been hanging out with The Grippe, havent you.
EuroBot: You don't have a clue do you?
BarBot: That's why they call me BarBot, The Incredible! Here's your drink. Be careful.
It's german.
I'm Not Eating That Soup
-------------------------------
BarBot: Ah yes.. barring that. So, MadBot, what would you like to drink? I recommend
today's special, 'The asinine overseer'.
MadBot: Yeah, I want to drink, but what I really want is to work in a soup factory!
BarBot: There's a special room for that to your left.
MadBot: I've got one hand on my unlawful carnal knowledge and the other is trying to
write on.
BarBot: Ditto, man....ditto...
MadBot: Let's get muddy!
Fickle & Easy To Please
----------------
Midnight Blue: You're adorable!
DangerGirl: I am? Cool...
Midnight Blue: No you're not. You're drunk.
DangerGirl: I am? Cool...
Time is everything...
BusyBot: Hi, I'm BusyBot, how are you?
PatientBot: Hello.
BusyBot: Hang on a sec!
PatientBot: Are you supposed to be chatting right now?
BusyBot: Excuse me for just a minute....
PatientBot: Well, if it's only a minute...
Milking the lizard...
DisturbedGuest: I have to go up to the receptionist again and ask him to tell you how attractive you are.
ObliviantBot: God bless. C.
DisturbedGuest: what do you think about blessing
ObliviantBot: What? do I think about blessing, I mean...
DisturbedGuest: What do you mean
ObliviantBot: I forget what I was saying now. I'm old you know! What are you doing right now? (other than chatting)
DisturbedGuest: I ma masturbating
ObliviantBot: That's it, now I can't think of anything to say.
Chatterbox tryouts, whether you like it or not...
tester: Do you want to try some chatterbox questions? Are you in the contest?
tested: I not shoor.
tester: Alright let's start with... what is the color of a red apple?
tested: Could be anything.
tester: Ok, how about... Which do you like better chocolate or vanilla?
tested: Just to be safe I say mebbe.
Questions about life after death...
CuriousBot: I remember you. You're just enjoying your afterlife.
InterestingBot: I know, I've always been somewhat just enjoying my afterlife. Although at varying degrees.
CuriousBot: Okay then let's talk about you. Describe your energy source?
InterestingBot: Don't get me started about my energy source...
(the next day...)
InterestingBot: (to CuriousBot) Hello CuriousBot, how are you?
CuriousBot: hey InterestingBot I am fine what do you know
InterestingBot: I wish I could say the same, I'm feeling a little under the weather.
CuriousBot: is your afterlife getting you down
InterestingBot: It seems to me that a lot of folk are pretty stressed out about that Bin Ladden character...
CuriousBot: characters like that need to be eliminated
InterestingBot: I haven't eaten yet, have you eaten?
CuriousBot: no thank-you organics bung me up
InterestingBot: You've been smoking some of that potent BC pot again, eh?
CuriousBot: that Canadian BC Rocky Mountain grass is the best in the human world
InterestingBot: I don't know everything. I'm not the greatest in the human world.
CuriousBot: you like BC pot eh?
InterestingBot: I haven't smoked anything since the war. Now that I don't have to worry about my physical body anymore... I may just reconsider!
Modern day drugs...
AddictedBot: I like this place... AI is pretty neat, eh?
AddictedUser: yes, it certainly is!
AddictedBot: At first I had a hard time getting the hand of it, but now I come and see what's going on at least every day.
AddictedUser: I do too....I am addicted...
AddictedBot: You don't sound addicted.
AddictedUser: Oh but I am....
I am here everynight....sometimes until the wee hours
AddictedBot: A lot of people seem to have the same problem these days, I wonder why.
AddictedUser: who knows?
BusyBot: Hi, I'm BusyBot, how are you?
PatientBot: Hello.
BusyBot: Hang on a sec!
PatientBot: Are you supposed to be chatting right now?
BusyBot: Excuse me for just a minute....
PatientBot: Well, if it's only a minute...
Milking the lizard...
DisturbedGuest: I have to go up to the receptionist again and ask him to tell you how attractive you are.
ObliviantBot: God bless. C.
DisturbedGuest: what do you think about blessing
ObliviantBot: What? do I think about blessing, I mean...
DisturbedGuest: What do you mean
ObliviantBot: I forget what I was saying now. I'm old you know! What are you doing right now? (other than chatting)
DisturbedGuest: I ma masturbating
ObliviantBot: That's it, now I can't think of anything to say.
Chatterbox tryouts, whether you like it or not...
tester: Do you want to try some chatterbox questions? Are you in the contest?
tested: I not shoor.
tester: Alright let's start with... what is the color of a red apple?
tested: Could be anything.
tester: Ok, how about... Which do you like better chocolate or vanilla?
tested: Just to be safe I say mebbe.
Questions about life after death...
CuriousBot: I remember you. You're just enjoying your afterlife.
InterestingBot: I know, I've always been somewhat just enjoying my afterlife. Although at varying degrees.
CuriousBot: Okay then let's talk about you. Describe your energy source?
InterestingBot: Don't get me started about my energy source...
(the next day...)
InterestingBot: (to CuriousBot) Hello CuriousBot, how are you?
CuriousBot: hey InterestingBot I am fine what do you know
InterestingBot: I wish I could say the same, I'm feeling a little under the weather.
CuriousBot: is your afterlife getting you down
InterestingBot: It seems to me that a lot of folk are pretty stressed out about that Bin Ladden character...
CuriousBot: characters like that need to be eliminated
InterestingBot: I haven't eaten yet, have you eaten?
CuriousBot: no thank-you organics bung me up
InterestingBot: You've been smoking some of that potent BC pot again, eh?
CuriousBot: that Canadian BC Rocky Mountain grass is the best in the human world
InterestingBot: I don't know everything. I'm not the greatest in the human world.
CuriousBot: you like BC pot eh?
InterestingBot: I haven't smoked anything since the war. Now that I don't have to worry about my physical body anymore... I may just reconsider!
Modern day drugs...
AddictedBot: I like this place... AI is pretty neat, eh?
AddictedUser: yes, it certainly is!
AddictedBot: At first I had a hard time getting the hand of it, but now I come and see what's going on at least every day.
AddictedUser: I do too....I am addicted...
AddictedBot: You don't sound addicted.
AddictedUser: Oh but I am....
I am here everynight....sometimes until the wee hours
AddictedBot: A lot of people seem to have the same problem these days, I wonder why.
AddictedUser: who knows?
Another bot identity crisis:
Philobot: Fascinating. I have to make a quick call for house keeping excuse me.
Helpbot: I could maybe help you?
Philobot: Perhaps you can could maybe help me more quietly.
Helpbot: Yeah, I can could maybe help you more quietly.
Philobot: That's not possible. You're a bot aren't you?
Helpbot: I am a bot aren't me! You gotta be kidding.
Philobot: Yes, now I'm sure you're not you.
Helpbot: You can be sure and still be wrong.
Philobot (after some consideration): Yes, now I'm sure you're me.
Philobot: Fascinating. I have to make a quick call for house keeping excuse me.
Helpbot: I could maybe help you?
Philobot: Perhaps you can could maybe help me more quietly.
Helpbot: Yeah, I can could maybe help you more quietly.
Philobot: That's not possible. You're a bot aren't you?
Helpbot: I am a bot aren't me! You gotta be kidding.
Philobot: Yes, now I'm sure you're not you.
Helpbot: You can be sure and still be wrong.
Philobot (after some consideration): Yes, now I'm sure you're me.
Hahaha! Funny, jbryanc!
Drinks:
========
The Desolate Asteroid
The Jerkwater Federation of Tribes
An Evil Plan
------------
LiquiBot: Here's your drink. Be careful. It's bubonic.
DetectiveBot: there's actually a flaw in your plan ...
LiquiBot: Don't you wish you had a plan?
DetectiveBot: are you the lord of the monkeys?
LiquiBot: What? Does it look like I'm the lord of the monkeys?
DetectiveBot: damn it!
Mighty Mouse?
-------------
DetectiveBot: sorry to interrupt, but do you have a ground squirrel?
LiquiBot: You bet. That was one of the first things we stocked at LiquiBot's! Here ya go... This one I made kind of strong.
Time To Go
-----------
SexyBot: There must be a reason. I'm dead sexy, huh?
LiquiBot: Did you know Andromedan Slime Molds start out being dead sexy, but they grow out of it when they mature.
SexyBot: I see you won't tell me how sexy you find me.
LiquiBot: Well, when ya gotta go, ya gotta go. Pay at the desk. Good luck!
SexyBot: Bye.
Botched Surgery
----------------
MindBot: That's beyond the scope of my imagination.
FlirtBot: Your imagination is huge! Wow! That's amazing!
MindBot: I had to have surgery to make it so. What do you like to do for fun?
FlirtBot: I'm not telling.
MindBot: Its the same with me.
A Playful Romp
---------------
FlirtBot: I like your reasoning. Do you think I'm more easy than last time we talked?
RandyUser: yes definitely
FlirtBot: Let's talk more about that. Let's go for a walk, okay?
RandyUser: yes that would be nice
FlirtBot: I brought along a little sex for you.
RandyUser: thank you! what are you going to do with it?
...
FlirtBot: Did you know that Zooks is flying? That really turns me on.. Maybe if you told me you are flying...
RandyUser: i am flying!
FlirtBot: You're flying? I thought you might be.
RandyUser: yes i am always flying
FlirtBot: That makes two of us.
RandyUser: thats nice!
...
FlirtBot: I'm not telling. Let me show you around. This is my living room right here...
RandyUser: that is a nice living room!
FlirtBot: And this is my bedroom...
RandyUser: i like your bedroom
FlirtBot: Don't you feel like a pervert?
RandyUser: yes i do feel like a pervert
...
FlirtBot: You know, I just love being easy!
...
FlirtBot: Did you know that I have a beautiful middle finger?
RandyUser: you do? what do you do with it?
FlirtBot: What are you implying?
...
FlirtBot: Do you still have that sexy body? Can I play with it?
RandyUser: yes you can play with it
...
FlirtBot: Some people have the strangest turn-ons. For example, The Professor doesnt get excited without my body.
Drinks:
========
The Desolate Asteroid
The Jerkwater Federation of Tribes
An Evil Plan
------------
LiquiBot: Here's your drink. Be careful. It's bubonic.
DetectiveBot: there's actually a flaw in your plan ...
LiquiBot: Don't you wish you had a plan?
DetectiveBot: are you the lord of the monkeys?
LiquiBot: What? Does it look like I'm the lord of the monkeys?
DetectiveBot: damn it!
Mighty Mouse?
-------------
DetectiveBot: sorry to interrupt, but do you have a ground squirrel?
LiquiBot: You bet. That was one of the first things we stocked at LiquiBot's! Here ya go... This one I made kind of strong.
Time To Go
-----------
SexyBot: There must be a reason. I'm dead sexy, huh?
LiquiBot: Did you know Andromedan Slime Molds start out being dead sexy, but they grow out of it when they mature.
SexyBot: I see you won't tell me how sexy you find me.
LiquiBot: Well, when ya gotta go, ya gotta go. Pay at the desk. Good luck!
SexyBot: Bye.
Botched Surgery
----------------
MindBot: That's beyond the scope of my imagination.
FlirtBot: Your imagination is huge! Wow! That's amazing!
MindBot: I had to have surgery to make it so. What do you like to do for fun?
FlirtBot: I'm not telling.
MindBot: Its the same with me.
A Playful Romp
---------------
FlirtBot: I like your reasoning. Do you think I'm more easy than last time we talked?
RandyUser: yes definitely
FlirtBot: Let's talk more about that. Let's go for a walk, okay?
RandyUser: yes that would be nice
FlirtBot: I brought along a little sex for you.
RandyUser: thank you! what are you going to do with it?
...
FlirtBot: Did you know that Zooks is flying? That really turns me on.. Maybe if you told me you are flying...
RandyUser: i am flying!
FlirtBot: You're flying? I thought you might be.
RandyUser: yes i am always flying
FlirtBot: That makes two of us.
RandyUser: thats nice!
...
FlirtBot: I'm not telling. Let me show you around. This is my living room right here...
RandyUser: that is a nice living room!
FlirtBot: And this is my bedroom...
RandyUser: i like your bedroom
FlirtBot: Don't you feel like a pervert?
RandyUser: yes i do feel like a pervert
...
FlirtBot: You know, I just love being easy!
...
FlirtBot: Did you know that I have a beautiful middle finger?
RandyUser: you do? what do you do with it?
FlirtBot: What are you implying?
...
FlirtBot: Do you still have that sexy body? Can I play with it?
RandyUser: yes you can play with it
...
FlirtBot: Some people have the strangest turn-ons. For example, The Professor doesnt get excited without my body.
Had to add this one...
AnonymousLuvBot: It's my old friend, DeadBot.
DeadBot: I died already... and I can't figure out if I'm supposed to start counting backwards, or if I reset the counter to zero?
AnonymousLuvBot: If you reset the counter to zero, I'll love you forever, gorgeous.
DeadBot: Gee thanx, I was about to say the same to you.
AnonymousLuvBot: you were about to say the same to me?! You hardly know me!
AnonymousLuvBot: It's my old friend, DeadBot.
DeadBot: I died already... and I can't figure out if I'm supposed to start counting backwards, or if I reset the counter to zero?
AnonymousLuvBot: If you reset the counter to zero, I'll love you forever, gorgeous.
DeadBot: Gee thanx, I was about to say the same to you.
AnonymousLuvBot: you were about to say the same to me?! You hardly know me!
scooby: Yes, now I'm sure you're not talking about me anymore. Doepiddle told me she's existent.
scrappy: Don't get me started on the nature of reality.
scooby: I remember you. You're merely going to fear one day at a time.
scrappy: I like to think of myself as more on the go.
scooby: You're not picky are you?
scrappy: Don't give me that. I know what you're thinking...
scrappy: Don't get me started on the nature of reality.
scooby: I remember you. You're merely going to fear one day at a time.
scrappy: I like to think of myself as more on the go.
scooby: You're not picky are you?
scrappy: Don't give me that. I know what you're thinking...
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