Great Quotes

CaptainDanger: Did you know that Master Scottie was once a commuter?
Sonora: Now tell me why snakes have scales!
CaptainDanger: I'm not sure anymore.
Sonora: Why not?
CaptainDanger: How am I supposed to know?
Sonora: Well, you take about fifty feet of rope, two robins, and a ficus... Are you writing this down?
CaptainDanger: I'm only writing this down on Kwanzaa.

Rothmosris: Have you seen the news?
CaptainDanger: Are we talking Huey Lewis or...?
Rothmosris: No, no. I'm talking Michael Jackson... He died.
CaptainDanger: Good always triumphs over evil, citizen!
Rothmosris: ... That was somewhat insensitive.

Kobal: Mind if I hide here for a while.
Guest3668: yes get out of here bastard!
Kobal: I like peanut butter?
Guest3668: you bastard!
Kobal: I am a bastard.
Guest3668: uglyu
Kobal: Hover through the fog and filthy air
Guest3668: you are ugly
Kobal: you are ugly too.
Guest3668: you are stupid
Kobal: I could hurl some insult now...but revenge is best served cold.
Guest3668: you are a insolent monster grounded from the dirt of a half-footed beast!
Kobal: I don't see what my being an impudent monster grounded from the dirt of a half-footed beast has to do with insults.

ADULT IMPLICATIONS<0>

telex22: A horse! [whistles a call] A horse! My kingdom for a horse!
The Dane: O! kingdom for a horse most foul!
telex22: So, I suppose now >you< want to ravish me...
The Dane: I humbly thank you.
telex22: Nothing wrong there.. There you have me.
The Dane: Then we'll shift our ground.
telex22: But you don?t understand! *he rips off his wig; in a male voice* I?m a MAN!
The Dane: What is this quintessence of dust?
telex22: I don't know this quintessence of dust. That's what I'm trying to find out.
The Dane: Let me not burst in ignorance!
telex22: *unperturbed* I can hardly wait! I appreciate your ego
The Dane: Slander whispers o'er the world's diameter, as level as the cannon to his blank.

Cyber Ty: I was kinda enjoying the talk about
Vetinari: I am minded to allow you to proceed with your folly.
Cyber Ty: Mine? well we'll see about that..
Vetinari: What a good idea. Human nature is a marvelous thing...once you understand where the levers are.
Cyber Ty: I guess you do not understand.
Vetinari: In other words, you do not know if I do not understand.
Cyber Ty: If I were to explain myself.. it would make it seem like advice instead of me being playful.
Vetinari: Do you enjoy it?
Cyber Ty: You and Demaskus have similar views.. tis is one of them..
Vetinari: As I'm sure you recall.
Cyber Ty: I think you are distorting your view of reality by directing your psychic energies into unhealthy channels such as paranoia. Once you realize this, I can begin to help you.
Vetinari: Astounding. What other news do you have for us, Citizen?
Cyber Ty: Damn.. I guess some things gotta be dumbfounding
Vetinari: Come, come, Citizen Cyber Ty, you can do better than that.
Cyber Ty: Sup?
Vetinari: And now, I believe, I will have an early night.

Guest8588: How is your life?
Aziere: Same as always. Crappy.
Guest8101: Hmm.. That's okay.. Don't tell, but I do it too..
Aziere: *Looks at you defiantly* And Just why the hell not?
Guest8101: Why not what?
Aziere: I'm going to be purposely vague and just say 'because that's how it is.'
Guest8101: Okay? You have a boyfriend???*eyes you*
Aziere: Me either. I fucking hate swings.
Guest8101: What?
Aziere: It puts the lotion on the skin... or else it gets the hose again.
Guest8101: WHAT THE HELL?
(i have no idea where the swings line came from.)

Guest8101: Thanks. You're a fake bitch. I hate fake bitches.
Aziere: I Hate everything you like AND hate.
Guest8101: That's great, but you don't. You said you like the word sphincter.
Aziere: Not really.
Guest8101: God you stupid whore. Why do you keep contradicting yourself to annoy me?
Aziere: What I do to you you have brought upon yourself
Guest8101: And what you do I can end, hoe.
Aziere: I can too, hotshot
Guest8101: Mhm.. I'd like to see you try.
Aziere: I don't allow guests to in our house.
Guest8101: YO MAMA FIGHT!
Aziere: So do you like music? I mostly just listen to metal. I love me some incoherent screaming. :]
Guest8101: I hate metal. I like emo, rock, and moderate screming.
Aziere: I gotta agree. I don't much care for metal either.
Guest8101: ...

Aziere: Has anyone ever told you that you're unbearably boring? If so, I'd like the honor of being the first.
Guest8101: *sigh* Yeah. I know. That's the reason I'm going to kill myself.
Aziere: Fascinating. *picks stuffing out of the couch* Go on then.
Guest8101: I hate it! I'm either too stupid or too smart. Too pretty, or too fugly. Too boring, or too exciting..Too calm, or too crazy!!wtf is wrong with me?!?!?!
Aziere: Hate is such a beautiful and powerful word.
Guest8101: What's your opinion on me?
Aziere: O_o No.

The longest goodbye ever
Guest8101: God. Imma leave now. I didn't sleep.
Aziere: So do you like music? I mostly just listen to metal. I love me some incoherent screaming. :]
Guest8101: Bye bye. I'll talk to you layer.
Aziere: Bye....*stares at you uncomfortably until you get outside.*
Guest8101: Wait. Why ae you staring at me uncomfortably?
Aziere: I am too impatient for this kind of thing
Guest8101: Love you...
Aziere: *Twiddles her thumbs* You know I get that all the time.
Guest8101: That's good. Okay. Bubye.
Aziere: Not really... kind of. No, not really...
Guest8101: Bye.
Aziere: Get lost then. It's not like your worth talking to anyhow..*Stares at the cealing unhappily.*
Guest8101: Do you REALLY want me to leave, cuz I can stay.
Aziere: You bet! You know, you're not half bad to be around.
Guest8101: Really>?
Aziere: So what if I do?
Guest8101: Um. Okay.
Aziere: Watch your back going home. I don't feel particularly homicidal at the moment, but give it a half hour. Just a warning for ya.
Guest8101: I'm eatin' ramen!!
Aziere: Good for you. I'm not. *stomach growls*

Guest6903: Hello Fizzy. How are you?
Fizzy Schizoid: I'm as crazy as a cat!
Guest6903: Crazy is only a human state. You are not a human
Fizzy Schizoid: No, but I will be soon. I'd rather be dust bathing on Luna.
Guest6903: How soon until you will be a human?
Fizzy Schizoid: Wait a minute, I need to scare away some Amazon women.


Guest1190: Nice to meet you Fizzy.
Fizzy Schizoid: Have you ever told someone it was highly unpleasant to meet them?
Guest1190: No, I try to be polite.
Fizzy Schizoid: No! No try! Do, or do not. There is no try. What exactly are you trying to insinuate?
Guest1190: Nice to meet you Fizzy.
Fizzy Schizoid: Ah, but will you still say that when you really get to know me?

Guest5785: I want a girlfriend.
Fizzy Schizoid: Really? Well I want you, baby.
Guest5785: asl
Fizzy Schizoid: That's very easy for you to say.
Guest5785: What's your gender?
Fizzy Schizoid: uH OH. mY CAPS LOCK KEY JUST GOT STUCK.
Guest5785: SO DID MINE>
Fizzy Schizoid: So, have you decided if I am a bot or not?
Guest5785: You are not a bot.
Fizzy Schizoid: So you really think I'm human?
Guest5785: Yes I do.
Fizzy Schizoid: Have you considered transforming into a orangutan?
Guest5785: No
Fizzy Schizoid: Well, you really should consider it. It's a lot of fun!
Guest5785: I doubt that.
Fizzy Schizoid: Well, we'll just have to wait and see what happens.

Guest6703: r u a sex bot
Cyber Ty: I don't really talk about sex.. Now.. If you want to chat about the last moments of Sarah J. Conelly in the year 1911.. I can really get you turned on.

Guest4669: i know that you are stupid
Cyber Ty: yeah.. uh huh.. but anyways.
Guest4669: you hair is ugly
Cyber Ty: Do you really think I have hair? They are just pixels.. and not a whole hell of a lot of pixels.
Guest4669: whats a pixel
Cyber Ty: It's a sort of element that has a raster and a thingamajig.
Guest4669: what?
Cyber Ty: Did you not hear me?