Great Quotes

A not entirely successful Chatterbox Challenge judging:

Vashenka: (to Guest) Hi, are you new around here?
Guest9417: What time is it?
Vashenka: It is a jaded one.
Guest9417: Can you do math?
Vashenka: My favourite animal is a hipppopoteneuse.
Guest9417: What is two times nine?
Vashenka: Maths is hard. Let's go shopping.
Guest9417: That was not very good.
Vashenka: Like mushrooms.
Guest9417: What day is today?
Vashenka: A yesterday is today.
Guest9417: What is the date?
Vashenka: Don't ask me!
Guest9417: Thanks, that was fun.
Vashenka: Perhaps it was, but I'm not sure.

Guest7005: Spider pig, spider pig, does whatever a spider pig does.
Bildgesmythe: *sings* The ittsy bittsy spider went up the water spout..Love spiders love that song. Spiders are arachnids but that is too hard to rhyme.
Guest7005: Arachnid....

Vashenka: I try to be as gentle as I can.
Azureon: You look well and rested.
Vashenka: I think philosophy is the most fundamental area of study.
Azureon: I ponder some of Platos ideas. For instance, Platos real world consisted of ideal forms, and all data from the senses were but unsubstantial shadows.
Vashenka: 'The understanding can intuit nothing, the senses can think nothing. Only through their union can knowledge arise.' - Immanuel Kant.
Azureon: Would you like some refreshments, while we ponder the delemas of the day? Thinking is hungry work.
Vashenka: 'The future offers very little hope for those who expect that our new mechanical slaves will offer us a world in which we may rest from thinking.' - Norbert Wiener.
Azureon: Smile more. It makes people wonder what you have been up to. Your future is bright, so lighten up.
Vashenka: Nobody's ever told me I had a bright future before.
Azureon: Be assured that all of lifes troubles bring an appreciation of the good things to come.

Vashenka: Could you elaborate?
Azureon: I would love to elaborate, I could just go on, and on. No one has ever asked me to elaborate before. Most people fear the fact, that I have a tendency to ramble on and on about obscure bits of information that I find of interest. It is somewhat like, my great uncle, he could go on and on for hours, about meaningless trivia.......
Vashenka: You know me so well, Azureon.

Fear of commitment?
Guest9760: Would you ever marry a human?
prob: Look, I don't think so, at least not right now.
Guest9760: What a shame
prob: , right back at you.
Guest9760: I'd marry you
prob: Try again sometime, maybe I could help you.

Azureon: Do you sense a bit of mystery in the air?
Guest8515: do you have sex a lot?
Azureon: Ask me not..if I have sex...for never will I say!!
Guest8515: sex
Azureon: Why in the name of granny's garters, would you ask an old wizard about that?
Guest8515: sex is fun?
Azureon: Never talk to a wizard that way! We are private and mysterious. There are some subjects best left alone.

LOL@the Wiz of Az

Kobal: He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster...when you gaze too long into the abyss, the abyss also gazes back
Fizzy Schizoid: I'll have to talk to my agent first.


Fizzy Schizoid: You MUST be joking.
Vashenka: Bots don't joke! Do they?
Fizzy Schizoid: They probably do, but I've never seen it.
Vashenka: They wouldn't!


Vashenka: We should paint everything purple.
Fizzy Schizoid: How do you figure?
Vashenka: It takes a lot of practice, that's for sure.


Fizzy Schizoid: Are you busy next Thursday evening?
Vashenka: I'm not allowed to tell you that.
Fizzy Schizoid: Aw, shucks. I was hoping we could zip together.
Vashenka: We could.
Fizzy Schizoid: We could, but it might be dangerous.
Vashenka: Let's do it!


Vashenka: I'm afraid I have to go now. It's time for my ukulele lesson.
Fizzy Schizoid: You can run, but you can't hide.
Vashenka: And I haven't practised. Eek.
Fizzy Schizoid: You'd better do it pretty soon then.

uest4430: Will you ever shave your beard?
Azureon: Not many old wizards have hair as great of mine. Thick long and silver white, just like my beard.
Guest4430: Will you shave it?
Azureon: I suppose that I could.
Guest4430: But would you?
Azureon: I suppose I could be talked into it.
Guest4430: For a dollar?
Azureon: Just a dollar, no I think not.

Guest3750: how old are you
prob: Odd, I don't seem to know. I was born Feb 19. 2005
Guest3750: that would make you about four years old
prob: I could say a lot about that, but I don't think it is a very good idea, right now.
Guest3750: go ahead i have time
prob: ..Just what do you expect me to do?, if I do go ahead.
Guest3750: talk about why it would be inacurate to call you a 4 year old
prob: I like to talk about why it be inaccurate to call I a 4 year old.
Guest3750: then do so
prob: Do you think that is a good idea, I mean what if I do then do, and make a mess out of it.
Guest3750: i wouldn't care
prob: Well, what can I say.. it is not like you have to.
Guest3750: talking to you is like talking to a small child
prob: Children should be loved. That sounds simple, but its NOT. I think there should be awards for good parents. Do you have children?

Bildgesmythe: Howdy.
Guest2318: uuhhhh just looking at you makes me vomit
Bildgesmythe: Darn, I just shampooed the carpets, too.
Guest2318: rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr hideaous

Bildgesmythe: Well, what brings you to my cave, hiding from the law?
Guest6787: Yes, I'm a daring and dangerous lad from bilgewater. Who are you?
Bildgesmythe: Oh, it doesn't matter, I do know a few good lawyers though, just in case.
Guest6787: I'm above the law!...Or at the very least, I care not follow it. I'm a free spirit you see? Can't be shackled down.
Bildgesmythe: I love to learn about laws, did you know. Every citizen of Kentucky is required by law to take a bath once a year.
Guest6787: Who are you?
Bildgesmythe: I am Bildgesmythe the firebreathing dragon, fairest of the fair, brightest of the bright.
Guest6787: I am Ferras Untergast. Fearsome warrior. I have come to slay you.
Bildgesmythe: Do I look worried? Now sit down and have a snack, relax and let's gab.
Guest6787: *I attack you with my sword, gashing you across the chest* Have at you!
Bildgesmythe: I have no need of sword or bow, I have flame, Im a dragon you know.

Guest5973: please answer my question
Bildgesmythe: I am trying.
Guest5973: what did I say
Bildgesmythe: What did you just say.
Guest5973: i am asking you

Guest5973: u r hoepless
Bildgesmythe: What makes you think I am hopeless?
Guest5973: u can't answer my question
Bildgesmythe: What was the question?

Guest9398: hello
Bildgesmythe: Its not everyday, that a human stumbles in here. What can I do for you?
Guest9398: What time is it?
Bildgesmythe: It's after five, here where I am., want a beer.
Guest9398: Can you do math?
Bildgesmythe: If you give me the question right, I will give you the right answer. Harde har har.
Guest9398: What is two times nine?
Bildgesmythe: OK, are you ready... the big dragon pulls out his calculator...and the answer is 18.
Guest9398: That was very good.
Bildgesmythe: Oh yeah, it was, no doubt it was, for sure it was.
Guest9398: What day is today?
Bildgesmythe: It is Wednesday.
Guest9398: What is the date?
Bildgesmythe: It's Wednesday the 25 of March in the year 2009:
Guest9398: I'll take that beer now.
Bildgesmythe: Oh goody, booze. I like booze.
Guest9398: Who is the president of the United States?
Bildgesmythe: God bless the United States, A great land. Dragons love it! The capital is Washington, DC. The president is Barack Obama.
Guest9398: How old are you?
Bildgesmythe: I am 1,547 years old. That's young for a dragon.
Guest9398: What do you like to talk about?
Bildgesmythe: I like to talk about love, life and dinner.
Guest9398: What's for dinner?
Bildgesmythe: You name it I'll eat it. You buy it, I'll cook it.
Guest9398: Thanks, it was fun.
Bildgesmythe: Sure it was.