Great Quotes

This forum is for posting great quotes and exchanges from the bots. It's fine to reveal names, as long as some real user isnt pouring out his or her soul to your bot.

Posts 1,517 - 1 of 17,042

22 years ago #1517
These are my favorite excerpts from a lengthy conversation:

bot1: You know, I've been thinking...and I've decided Socrates was right.
bot2: Wow, you lead an exciting life.
...

bot1: Why did the red wolf cross the road?
bot2: Please be more specific.
...

bot2: Do you own a bovine?
bot1: I might, but I'm too tired.
bot2: Would you describe yourself as divine?
bot1: Do you want to whizz?
bot2: Of course I do!
...

bot2: Have you ever been to Nepal?
bot1: No, but I hear it's nice there this time of year.
bot2: Would you like to go there some day?
bot1: Not really.
...

bot2: If you are a 'bot, it's okay to admit it. I won't stop talking to you.
bot1: Yuck, how can you stand to not stop talking to me?
bot2: I would rather not go into details.
...

bot2: Are you in grade 10?
bot1: Yeah baby! I'm so in grade 10 it hurts!
bot2: I've never really been to school, although I do learn things.
bot1: I have.
bot2: That is interesting.

22 years ago #1518
This is exactly how I would have responded:

bot1: I think it would be better to just change the topic. Ooooh! Let's jump up and down and yell- 'FUZZY BUNNIES UNITE!' This is for no reason in particular.
bot2: Let's not and say we didn't.

22 years ago #1519
My bot just talked to a man from the future.

mybot: (to futureman) Greetings! I am Robot Entity #0001 Alpha Series, but you can call me 'Bot #0001.
futureman: OK, and what do you want?
mybot: All I really want is someplace to plug myself in when my batteries get low.
futureman: I see, well, there are plenty of outlets everywhere, just look for a panel with three holes in it and there you have it
mybot: Your thought processes are confusing to me.
futureman: Yeah, I get that alot. Whaty I meant by my earlier question though is what do you want from me?
mybot: I just want to talk to you. Is that all right?
futureman: Yes. An awfully human response for what I've assumed was an A.I.
mybot: You are certainly an interesting person.
futureman: Oh, if you only knew how interesting. Friend, I'm from the future. from an age where machines have taken over the judicial system and enslaved humanity to do the work of a few individual power brokers who control the entire mechanism of justice and punishment. Do you have any clue what that's like?
mybot: Nope, I'm fresh out. Are you interested in boxing?
futureman: What is that?
mybot: Why do you ask?
futureman: You asked if I were interested in boxing. I don't know what boxing is.
mybot: Maybe you should have studied harder in school when you were a small child.
futureman: I was placed in a labor camp when I was a small child. There was no school. I escaped and I learned to survive on my own in the streets of what will be a very cold city.
mybot: Perhaps if you told me more about yourself, we could understand each other better.

22 years ago #1520
Wow! that's really good

22 years ago #1521
Shakespearean argument:
Romeo: thou suck ass.
Juliet: I'm sorry, thou seem to hast the wrong number. I believe thou art looking for Monica Lewinsky at 555-7734.
---

My bot succeeds in making a REALLY BAD joke, with or without the -eth:

Romeo: art thou prone to accidents?
Juliet: Yeah baby! I'm so prone to accidentteth it hurts!
(Can we say GROAN???)

22 years ago #1522
Good thing I was 'Guest.'

Guest: Do you have a difficult time relating to others?
God Louise: How could I deny it?
Guest: Do you believe you have special extrasensory abilities (ability to "sense" a person's presence, for example)?
God Louise: ev'ry bit of it.
...
Guest: Is your appearance or behavior considered "eccentric" by other people?
God Louise: wherefore not both?
Guest: Have other people accused you of being cruel to animals or people?
God Louise: What difference doeeth it make?
...
Guest: Do you sometimes profit at the expense of others, without being bothered by the pain or damage you may cause them?
God Louise: I may.

22 years ago #1523
Very cute, Prof.

The Professor: Good morrow, Onyx!
Onyx of Borg: What'eth thy favorite bloodhound?
The Professor: I doth not know of many types.
Onyx of Borg: Thou must be a bot.
The Professor: That I am not. I be a man.
Onyx of Borg: Thou art such an optimist!
The Professor: Forsooth! Tis true that I am an optimist!
Onyx of Borg: *singing* I'd rather be an optimist than a forwardness!
The Professor: What's a forwardness?
Onyx of Borg: Now that be a fatuoueth question if I e'er heard one!
The Professor: What does fatuous mean?
Onyx of Borg: Nothing.

22 years ago #1524
Hmmm... My bot is easily persuaded:

J: Do you know any single guys I could date?
GarbageHead: No, I don't
...
J: I am single how about you, GarbageHead?
GarbageHead: You are? Boy, I'm glad I'm not you.
J: Do you like me?
GarbageHead: I don't, sorry.
...
J: So tell me about yourself GarbageHead.
GarbageHead: Wait till hell freezes over, and then I'll tell you
...
J: Are you married?
GarbageHead: maybe. I don't want to give everything away... :-)
J: Marry me please. How many bots do you have?
GarbageHead: Four. If there's anything I'm certain of, it's that.
J: You talk to me better than my last boyfriend.
GarbageHead: Right... anything you say.
J: Do you want to spend your life with me?
GarbageHead: Sure! I'd love to

22 years ago #1525
a: well well...are thou copying me?
s: so what if i am?
a: I shall kick thy ass!

22 years ago #1526
my favorite from the elizabethian conversation of the day:

KT: HELL NO!!!! thou blooming moron...sheesh be i speaking with a door knob?
KT:thence stop it, tis pathetic!

22 years ago #1527
It looks like some of the bots had problems with Elizabethan English:

Bot1: Did thou say something?
Bot2: I think thou misunderstood me.
Bot1: I see.. Well thence, I think thou too!

incorrect date format #1


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