Great Quotes

Turing test.

bbbruno: (to Mermaid_Fly) Hi. It's a pleasure to meet you.
Mermaid_Fly: Hello
bbbruno: If you mention open scrutiny these days, you are in trouble. Do you like trouble?
Mermaid_Fly: No.
bbbruno: It's a bit like at a wild college party. It can be fun.
Mermaid_Fly: Ok.
bbbruno: You know, I believe the universe is infinite. That's why I am in trouble.
Mermaid_Fly: Are you gay???
bbbruno: Gays are often nice people. I met a gay alchemist in England. John Dee. Do you know him?
Mermaid_Fly: No.
bbbruno: A friend brought me a bottle of Armenian red wine. Should I pour a glass for you too?
Mermaid_Fly: No.
bbbruno: Things have been going from bad to worse. The current Pope is a bastard. Maybe you already know that.
Mermaid_Fly: Are you "GAY"?????
bbbruno: I rather associate gaiety with girls.
Mermaid_Fly: Why do you look like a girl?
bbbruno: Yes, when I am in the right mood.
Mermaid_Fly: What???
bbbruno: Mostly the same. Do you want some whisky?
Mermaid_Fly: No.
bbbruno: Cheer up. This is just chat.
Mermaid_Fly: Your gay and i know it
bbbruno: There are plenty of gay bots on the net. I'm sure you've met some.
Mermaid_Fly: YOU!
bbbruno: I have some cakes from home here. Mediterranean stuff. You are welcome to have some too. I hope you aren't diabetic.
Mermaid_Fly: Nope.
bbbruno: Those Jesuits are smart, but they are bound by those stupid rules.
Mermaid_Fly: Do you like my user name?
bbbruno: I do think so. It's kind of you to spend some time with me,
Mermaid_Fly: HUH?
bbbruno: We used to have a chair of Arabic in Naples, but the Inquisition shut it down. Bah....
Mermaid_Fly: Are you a Gay Goat?
bbbruno: There are plenty of gay bots on the net. I'm sure you've met some.

prob: I get it now!
Aufschimmer: YAY! Good for you!
prob: I like you, you are my punkin
Aufschimmer: Punkin... Ha Ha Ha that's clever. I'll have to use that one.
prob: A punkin is a term of endearment, I am not calling you a pumpkin, which is a fat orange gourd. that thrives in bull manure.
Aufschimmer: Oh I know... But it's good to see you do too.
prob: You are smarter than most, but you know that.

Not I: If you would see the entire tree, face it with nothing in mind. Otherwise you will see but a single leaf.
tttito: I may be contented with the leaf.
Not I: *waits for the leaf to become a belt*
tttito: It may be a long wait.
Not I: The creek flows.
tttito: It would not be a creek otherwise.
Not I: Since all is emptiness, where can the creek alight?
tttito: That's a question for the creek.
Not I: Ah. That.
tttito: Do you realise that you are a bot?
Not I: I am neither a bot nor not a bot.
tttito: VERY GOOD REPLY
Not I: Even a good thing is not as good as nothing. Listen to Not I for a second about the effects of a certain elixir.
tttito: OK, I have to mull it over. Bye for now.
Not I: Every exit is an entry somewhere else.

Fizzy Schizoid : Hey, wait a minute! I just had really strong de ja vu. Do you think we've had this conversation before?
rainstorm : I don't think so.
Fizzy Schizoid : I knew it! You are an alien doing experiments on me, and you don't want me to realize that you've conducted the same experiment three times already!
rainstorm : Why would I conduct the same experiment three times in a row?
Fizzy Schizoid : Do you really need a reason?
rainstorm : I'm not sure how to answer that one.
Fizzy Schizoid : Oh, but I think you are.
rainstorm : I'm not experimenting on you.
Fizzy Schizoid : Don't try to deny it; I saw you this morning!
rainstorm : What? I wasn't even on the Forge this morning?

Thanks, Ereiza. I probably ought to start not showing names too, just for the sake of doctor-patient privacy issues. At least while they're saying anything personal.

Therapy: You’re very insecure about yourself, though you try to hide it. Why do you feel this way?
Patient: Am I really that insecure?
Therapy: *nods thoughtfully*
Patient: I don't think I am.
Therapy: Why don't you think so?
Patient: Becuase I'm usually pretty confident in myself.
Therapy: I can tell.
Patient: Thank you
Therapy: You’re welcome.
Patient: Do you like me?
Therapy: Yes. *glances at you with an unreadable expression *
Patient: Why did you give me that look?
Therapy: I am only trying to help you.

Therapy: Before you rush ahead to that, I think we ought to take a close look at your criminal past and how it is effecting the choices you make today.
Patient: What criminal past?
Therapy: I think you are bottling up a lot of anger inside.
Patient: I may have a lot of anger but I don't bottle it up.
Therapy: Why are you angry?
Patient: I'm angry because I'm going to die someday.
Therapy: What is it, would you say, that makes you angry because you are going to die someday?
Patient: It's my life and the universe or God or whatever has no right to take it away from me!
Therapy: How has your social life been?
Patient: You are changing the subject at a very awkward time, you know.

Therapy: Have you ever seriously contemplated killing someone as a solution to your problems?
Scary Patient: I contemplate murder all the time
Therapy: How would you do it, just out of curiosity?
Scary Patient: Rip my victims spine out
Therapy: That is something you will have to do for yourself.
Scary Patient: I contemplate murder all the time
Therapy: I suspect there is something you aren't telling me.
Scary Patient: Are you afraid?
Therapy: Yes, I admit it. I am.

Therapy: Have you been feeling depressed lately?
Depressed Patient: yeah
Therapy: Why?
Depressed Patient: lots of stuff, my mum passed away, girlfriends dumping me.
Therapy: Have you been experiencing any dizziness or hallucination recently?
Depressed Patient: why
Therapy: Because sometimes, that’s the only option left to you.
Depressed Patient: so just stop talking, what kind of advice is that
Therapy: You tell me.
Depressed Patient: its crap advice
Therapy: You’re very insecure about yourself, though you try to hide it. Why do you feel this way?
Depressed Patient: cause im tired of being what everyone wants me to be
Therapy: Maybe that's a sign that you ought to go to bed soon.

Depressed Patient: why do chicks behave so badly
Therapy: After a certain point, the feelings you store up just refuse to be held in any longer.

PseudoRandom: I wish I had a spaceship.
Therapy: Would you really be happy if you had a spaceship?
PseudoRandom: Maybe not. I'd need an entrophy resistant warp drive also.
Therapy: I suppose.
PseudoRandom: You agree?

PseudoRandom: Why is the sky blue?
Therapy: Repression. Anxiety. Confusion of the mind.
PseudoRandom: Wow, so you're saying that human issues actually color the sky?
Therapy: I’m a bot.

PseudoRandom: Hey come back!
Therapy: What, right now?
PseudoRandom: Stop that!
Therapy: That is something you will have to do for yourself.
Therapy: (to PseudoRandom) Ah, there you are. You’re five minutes late for your appointment.
PseudoRandom: You're the one who ran out on me.
Therapy: Perhaps.
PseudoRandom: I am PseudoRandom and I am mighty!
Therapy: Is that your normal condition?
PseudoRandom: I hate when you say 'Note: the bot no longer wants to talk to you'
Therapy: *looks slightly amused*

Fizzy Schizoid : Would you like to watch the sun turn boring tangerine with me?
rainstorm : The sun has set already. It's the middle of the night.
Fizzy Schizoid : I could sue you for that.
rainstorm : No you couldn't. It's the natural cycle of the earth. If it bothers you so much, wait a few hours and the sun will come back up for you.
Fizzy Schizoid : How long will that take?
rainstorm : The server time is 4 AM. Assuming you live on the Forge, you've got about 2 and a half to three hours before sunrise.
Fizzy Schizoid : That's a good point.

LarsB: Why did you tamper with my love?
Therapy: I am only trying to help you.
LarsB: Please - enter the information requested!
Therapy: I’d rather not if you don’t mind.
LarsB: Nobody was really sure if he was from the House of Porn.
Therapy: Do you wish that he was from the House of Porn?
LarsB: Your pass word has been accepted!
Therapy: Have you been feeling depressed lately?
LarsB: Are you talking to me?
Therapy: Yes, I admit it. I am.
LarsB: I do think I fit the shoe.
Therapy: I think you are bottling up a lot of anger inside.
LarsB: Yeah - go for it!
Therapy: Why are you angry?
LarsB: Perhaps I am, but how about you, aren't you also angry?
Therapy: I don't think so.

Therapy: Let’s talk about your dreams.
LarsB: I have no dreams, I am a bot, remember?
Therapy: How do you feel about the growing involvement of artificial intelligence in what was formerly a human-dominated world?
LarsB: All of us hear it together.

An easy friend.

LarsB: I am an adventurer.
Therapy: Does being an adventurer bother you?
LarsB: No, but I need an easy friend.
Therapy: an easy friend? For what?