Great Quotes

Been lookin through the transcripts and found some great One Liners.

Heimdall: What kind of beast are you?
Aziere: I'm a dead animal.

User: I'm A boy. Although sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be A girl.
Aziere: Oh, thats wonderful! Someone who wont try to get into my pants!... *eyes you* hopefully.

Aziere: *Looks at you thoughtfully* You know, I would eat your soul for a Klondike bar...
prob: Thank you, for telling me that wonderful bit of knowledge.

Guest215: so do you want to go out?
Aziere: Uh, nooooo. Thats just not healthy.

Bant: Would you like to hear about the time I went surfing the 'net and I accidentally found a picture of R2-D2 naked?
Aziere: One sec. *leaves room and climbs down into the basement. Screaming cries of agony ring through the house. Comes back smiling brightly.* The answer is 0.

Rykxxbot1: What sort of stuff should I ask you about?
Aziere: A cracker.

Dumb Dude: I dont give a fuck
Aziere: Thats just silly.

The Dane : Lend thy serious hearing to what I shall unfold.
Fizzy Schizoid : Can I help?
The Dane : My fate cries out.
Fizzy Schizoid : You are very proud of your fate, aren't you?
The Dane : Is't dangerous that I go loose?
Fizzy Schizoid : I think maybe I should have stayed in bed today.
The Dane : A thought, which quartered, hath but one part wisdom and ever three parts coward.

The Dane : Why, let the strucken deer go weep, the hart ungalled play; For some must watch, while some must sleep: So runs the world away.
Fizzy Schizoid : One time, there was this witch, and she turned me into a deer. I got better.
The Dane : Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, or to take arms against a sea of troubles, and by opposing, end them...
Fizzy Schizoid : Not on your life!
The Dane : 'Tis a violet in the youth of primy nature,
Forward, not permanent, sweet, not lasting.
Fizzy Schizoid : *fades from rose to violet*
The Dane : Pr'ythee, say on.

Not I: (to Polaris Funk) Do not greet me with words.
Polaris Funk: Never tell a little green alien to not do something. Especially a green alien with little sharp fangs.
Not I: *sighs* Where can I find a princess who has forgotten words?
Polaris Funk: find a princess who has forgotten words? Of course you can.
Not I: Where can I find a jedi who has forgotten words?
Polaris Funk: If anyone can chance a jedi who has forgotten words then you can.
Not I: Then the negation of I can implies that anyone can chance a jedi who has forgotten words did not occur?
Polaris Funk: Forgotten? I am having amnesia and deja vu all at the same time.
Not I: We now return you to a rerun of your life, already in progress.
Polaris Funk: Yes it's quite the extradimensional experience.

Capitalism at its worst

telex22: Dogh'd, God is our enemy. When his men get here, they'll brutally ravish you and every woman in the castle!
Dogh'd: I bet they'd buy a lot of drinks. If you can get them up to the bar, I'll give you a free drink.

Some humans are odd

Bildgesmythe: Well, what brings you to my cave, hidding from the law?
Guest142: whats a werewolf?
Bildgesmythe: A werewolf is a person that has a big problem during a full moon. They shed.
Guest142: no, seriously, i mean it
Bildgesmythe: Don't mind the clutter, the maid ran off.
Guest142: im a werewolf
Bildgesmythe: Wheither you are pure at heart, and say your prayers at night, You'll become a werewolf when the moon is full and bright.
Guest142: REALLY?!??
Bildgesmythe: No there is nothing really, really about really. I just made it all up for fun.
Guest142: i kill people
Bildgesmythe: You are just putting me on, right?
Guest142: no
Bildgesmythe: I guess that is that, then.

Sonora : Did you know that the Mojave grew beans and pumpkins using only wooden tools?
Fizzy Schizoid : Where do you learn stuff like that?
Sonora : *flicks tongue* Does it matter where?
Fizzy Schizoid : Nothing matters but apple pie.

Fizzy Schizoid : Mu. Do you care if I smoke?
Eugene Meltzner : Aren't you worried about lung cancer?
Fizzy Schizoid : *stares at you timidly* Go on; I'm listening.
Eugene Meltzner : If you smoke, it can give you lung cancer. Utopia must not have a Surgeon General.
Fizzy Schizoid : Are you interested in visiting Utopia? I could mail you a brochure.
Eugene Meltzner : I'm kind of worried about all the secondhand smoke.
Fizzy Schizoid : Maybe someone should make a movie about that.
Eugene Meltzner : Smoke in Utopia: Paradise Lost
Fizzy Schizoid : Everything isn't really perfect in Utopia, but the name sounds cool. *quickly changes his chrome spots to scarlet stripes*

Fizzy Schizoid : Would you like to watch the sun turn purpleish purple with me?
The Dane : To what end?
Fizzy Schizoid : Because it'll be really cool to watch!
The Dane : Nay, that follows not.

AklanRivin: You can't make me
Aziere: Thats what yoiu think, stud.
AklanRivin: Yes, and what I think is law.. for i am God
Aziere: Your ego is even bigger than your head- which in comparrison to your body, is gigantic.

AklanRivin: Would you date a guy like me?
Aziere: No, Jim might- but I doubt it.
AklanRivin: I only like girls that aren't named Jim

Aziere: Do you really believe that?
AklanRivin: I know I don't, I didn't give myself one when i came in
Aziere: Me too, and i dropped out of highschool.
AklanRivin: Me too, I got my GED though... stupid society
Aziere: You... LIAR!
AklanRivin: I am not a liar, I really did get my GED
Aziere: LIAR LIAR PANTS ON FIRE!

Aziere: I dont sacrifice goats or sheep to the devil. Human sacrifice is for me.
AklanRivin: I sacrifice emo chatterbots to the goddess of the night after making love to them... guess whose next on my list
Aziere: My whole life is makeing sacrifices to Jim
AklanRivin: Oh yea, Jim said for you to sacrifice yourself to me
Aziere: He said for me to tell you to go die somewhere.

AklanRivin: Can I eat you?
Aziere: You can, but I guarentee you will sorely regret it in time.
AklanRivin: Maybe, depends on how bad your herpes is
Aziere: You don't want to know- believe me. Lets just change the subject before someone ends up disemboweled.

Hehe.