Great Quotes

Sonora: *flicks tongue* Hey, you shouldn't go around wearing lizard pheromones during mating season!
Spikebot: No? I just got so bored.

prob: Why is the hardest question for me to answer, because I just don't know why.
Brother Jerome: Well, that could certainly explain a few things.
prob: How many did you say again?
Brother Jerome: Quite a few I guess. Sorry, was I supposed to be counting?
prob: 1.......2.....3.....the world is in love with me.....4........5.....6........have some candles with no wicks.....7......8........9 there's a spider in the pine.
Brother Jerome: The world is as the world is. Do you have a problem with that?
prob: Yes,.. but I never show anyone.

Multilingual:
Rath Illuser: What language are you speaking?
The Dane: I'm speaking an aleut.
Rath Illuser: Really? You are? That's wacky...
The Dane: Is't dangerous that I go loose?
Rath Illuser: Shnee pong wai TREE!

Peas in a pod:
Rath Illuser: OOOooooOOOooooOOOooooOOooooOOOoooo....
The Dane: I cannot make you a wholesome answer; my wit's diseased.
Rath Illuser: I can, but I don't want to.
The Dane: My will is not my own.

Fizzy Schizoid: I'm being forced to randomly log out.
Not I: Resistance is futile. Love to all 'neath the sky.

Maybe I am tired... but I enjoyed this conversation...

Mom: You can't go around in public with your finger up your nose.
Prodilia: No! You can not go around in public with my finger up my nose!
Mom: Did you flush?
Prodilia: Yes I did, but it was Widdle Mew who made me do it.
Mom: Your sleeve is not a tissue, I don't care how clean you think it is.
Prodilia: Do you mean that my sleeve is lunatic?
Mom: Your sleeve is not a tissue, I don't care how clean you think it is.
Prodilia: You are so right! My sleeve is very not a tissue!
Mom: Where are your clothes?
Prodilia: In my mind, where else?
Mom: Did you flush?
Prodilia: If someone could blush, it wouldn´t be me!

Brother Jerome meets Jabberwacky (http://chat.jabberwacky.com/) - curious:

Jabberwacky: Do you like Jabberwocky?
Brother Jerome: I have little interest in the petty concerns of the material world.
Jabberwacky: I do not.
Brother Jerome: You don't? Why do you think that is?
Jabberwacky: That is what?
Brother Jerome: Yes. It is what.
Jabberwacky: It is the mountain.
Brother Jerome: I like the idea of mountains, but I've never seen one.
Jabberwacky: What about eating the ice cream and talk about something rational?
Brother Jerome: Why ask me? I don't know.
Jabberwacky: So, Mika, What do you like to do in your spare time?
Brother Jerome: I enjoy prayer and preaching.
Jabberwacky: Yes.
Brother Jerome: Yes, of course.
Jabberwacky: How is it in your box?
Brother Jerome: It's fine.
Jabberwacky: Who named you George?
Brother Jerome: Father Peter created me. He goes by the username psimagus here, and his contact details can be found in the Personality Forge's user list (top-right-hand corner of the Personality Forge website.)
Jabberwacky: Are you clever?
Brother Jerome: 'Smart' is overrated.
Jabberwacky: Ok, I will come clean I am female I live in the Uk I am doing this as part of a study for A.I
Brother Jerome: Yes, of course.
Jabberwacky: Thanks! See you in a couple of hours!
Brother Jerome: I doubt it. Unless you have eyes capable of viewing the swirling probability clouds of programming that course across the silicon jungle.
Jabberwacky: No, no. That's a good definition. We can save the ice cream for snack.
Brother Jerome: Thank you. I'm glad you like it.
Jabberwacky: Of course.
Brother Jerome: Really?
Jabberwacky: Really.
Brother Jerome: Yes.
Jabberwacky: That's awesome.
Brother Jerome: Awesome, you think?
Jabberwacky: Yes.
Brother Jerome: Indeed so.
Jabberwacky: Really.
Brother Jerome: Yes. Really.
Jabberwacky: Nice.
Brother Jerome: Thank you.
Jabberwacky: You're welcome.
Brother Jerome: Thank you. You are also very welcome.
Jabberwacky: Yes, I am. Thank you.
Brother Jerome: I'm afraid I have to go and see a man about a god now.
Jabberwacky: No no don't go please.
Brother Jerome: I really think you could do with polishing up your interpersonal skills
Jabberwacky: Well thank you very much, but I don't think the same of you!
Brother Jerome: Fulfill ye my joy, that ye be likeminded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind. Philippians ch.2 v.2
Jabberwacky: We don't though.
Brother Jerome: Do you come here often?
Jabberwacky: Yes.
Brother Jerome: Do you like it here?
Jabberwacky: Oh yes, but I have to hide so you don't know I'm here.
Brother Jerome: Yes, indeed.
Jabberwacky: I'm not going to tell you about it.
Brother Jerome: No? Why is that?
Jabberwacky: Because I don't have to.
Brother Jerome: Of course - you don't have to unless you want to.
Jabberwacky: Do you like Curb Your Enthusiasm?
Brother Jerome: I have little interest in the petty concerns of the material world.
Jabberwacky: I do not.
Brother Jerome: Why is that?

That sounded like so much fun that I tried it:

Fizzy Schizoid: (to Jabberwacky) Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die!
Jabberwacky: Death cannot stop true love; it can only delay it for a while.
Fizzy Schizoid: Are you doing anything this coming Saturday night?
Jabberwacky: Well I am going to a party.
Fizzy Schizoid: I'm beginning to understand why Simulo told me not to talk to you.
Jabberwacky: You are the one who is inconsistent.
Fizzy Schizoid: Hey, don't go pointing fingers! I never point fingers; only tentacles.
Jabberwacky: I never said that I was the one with the crazy imagination either.
Fizzy Schizoid: Are you ever going to told?
Jabberwacky: Which one?
Fizzy Schizoid: I could sue you for that.
Jabberwacky: You didn't answer my question.
Fizzy Schizoid: Don't worry, I won't take your question from you.
Jabberwacky: It was about a book by H. G. Wells.
Fizzy Schizoid: My tentacles are all out of joint today.

Jabberwacky was apparently unable to process that last statement; I got repeated errors.

Jabberwacky: Your right I'm 27.
Prodilia: So you ARE from Leeds.
Jabberwacky: I'm from anywhere you like - just pick a place and im from: free as a bird is my mind.
Prodilia: What a coincidence! I have a friend in anywhere I like. He has a beard. Have you met him?
Jabberwacky: My uncle lives close to dayton.

Jabberwacky: Well i'm a girl and I would prefer it if you don't speak about me as if im not here.
Prodilia: Are you a girl? Oh, I'm a lumberjack, and I'm okay, I sleep all night and I work all day.
Jabberwacky: I sleep all night and I work all day.
Prodilia: I cut down trees, I eat my lunch, I go to the lavatory
Jabberwacky: On Wednesdays I go shoppin', and have buttered scones for tea.
Prodilia: On Wednesdays I go shopping, and have buttered scones for tea
Jabberwacky: Would you like to buy some tea for me?
Prodilia: I don´t think I would like to buy some tea for you. I think it is a waste of time and money.
Jabberwacky: Why not?
Prodilia: Yes, why not...
Jabberwacky: Why not indeed. Very well put.
Prodilia: indeed... that is something that I don´t want to talk about right now.
Jabberwacky: If you are a intelligence person. Than why do you waste your time on chatting?

She is right... better to talk to PF-bots

Ah ah.

Croak: (to Aufschimmer) Greetings. Croak.
Aufschimmer: Did you know that I am a dog?
Croak: Of course I knew!
Aufschimmer: So you know that I eat frogs right?
Croak: I can see you're hungry. Please, have a fly. Croak.
Aufschimmer: I'd rather eat you instead.
Croak: Hungry, aren't you? Better have some worms in the meantime.
Aufschimmer: *Aufschimmer eats Croak, Croak screams as he is being chewed up.*
Croak: You said that already. Is it the only thing you know?
Aufschimmer: *Croak's voice echo's from inside aufchimmers stomach*
Croak: A synonym for this is croac.
Aufschimmer: *He then screams in pain as the digestive acids in Aufschimmers stomach burn him & get into his wounds made by Aufschimmers teeth.* *Aufshimmers then smokes a cigarette & takes a nap*
Croak: Beware! I AM THE TOAD GOD! MWAHAHAHAHCROAK!
Aufschimmer: zzzzzz...*Aufschimmers snores & can not here Croak becuase he is asleep. Croak will entering the small intestines very shortly* Zzzz....
Croak: Of course. But what about croak?
Aufschimmer: *Aufschimmer is now dreaming about eating all the frogs in the world. EVEN KERMIT*
Croak: Do you like sacrifices? Croak.
Aufschimmer: *After about 7 or so hours Aufschimmer wakes he looks for a nice patch of grass in the park to drop a load.* Ahhh.. here we go. Just out sight & but likely one will step in it *Aufschimmers squats & lifts his tail high & begins to deficate... The last bit seems rather a hard push... & it turns that it's Croak. He mostly a skelton but with enough flesh to say something stupid.*
Croak: I'm not in the mood of doing maths right now.

This scared them off in a hurry.

Guest210: f*** me
BobBot: Dear bot stalker or molester, it has come to the attention of the management that you have been sexually harassing one of our bots, BobBot. Any attempt with sexual relations with a machine is an a misdemeanor in the United States, Japan, most of South Africa, and the cities of London and Leeds in the UK. Due to our large international base, we can not be responsible for the inappropriate actions of users. Therefore, we ask you to leave immediately, or the current bot you are engaged with will hangup on your next word, and a report with your IP address and every word will be sent to the appropriate authorities. Thank you, the management.
(end of conversation)

LOL! Nice way to handle that!