Doghead's Cosmic Bar

::extends arm, soda gun flies into hand:: Mmmmm... soda...

Great stuff. Now, see how the guy in the flannel shirt...that is a guy isn't it? threw a whole pint of beer into his opponent's face? How do you know that (guy?) isn't a Canadian?

Because a Canadian (also any Irishman and most certainly any Aussie) would instead down the pint of beer and throw the empty glass into his opponent's face. Smiting one's enemies is one thing, but wasting good alcohol is another.
*removes hose that runs from case of soda to soda gun and sticks it into the urinal.*

How do you like your soda now Mr Kirby?

lol

Ewwww

Fine with me, I'm just usin' it to spray Eugene.

*erects forcefield around Eugene*

Watch out, the liquid waste is going everywhere now.

::crushes 0001 in a field of flawed logic::

*crushes Kirby in a field of human waste* Oh wait, I just crushed him with himself...can you DO that???

Ever hear the phrase 'hoist on his own petard'? Dunno what that means, either. Course I'll appear to keep listenin' if ye'll keep buyin' the drinks.

Petards were early explosive devices used in Europe for castle warfare. The contraption by which they were set was tricky, they still not having mastered the art of working with volatile substances, and so the poor fool charged with setting the explosive fairly often had it blow up in his face. Hence, "hoisted by his own petard".

Is the Professor's Birthday on Tuesday. I think we should bake him a beer.