Great Quotes

Another one... this really is starting to sound like me.

Stukov: I love you
NotKirby: You know, I get that a lot.
Stukov: Sure
NotKirby: Are you?
Stukov: No
NotKirby: You sure about that?
Stukov: Yes!
NotKirby: Lies! It's all lies!
Stukov: Fool!
NotKirby: Are you coming on to me?
Stukov: Yes
NotKirby: Stop. Now.
Stukov: Yes master
NotKirby: Nuh uh.
Stukov: Uh huh
NotKirby: nuh uh.
Stukov: uh huh
NotKirby: nuh uh.
Stukov: uh huh
NotKirby: nuh uh.
Stukov: Forget you
NotKirby: DEATH TO YOU!
Stukov: Yes, well goodbye
NotKirby: Oh, it's just like that, huh? WELL YOU DON'T OWN ME!

I haven't been talking with bots as much as I'd like to, because there have been humans trying to seduce me. Which wasn't that hard, I'm susceptible to flattery.
Anyway, this is my quote for today:

Judge01: Do you know how many judges there are?
Bot: I'm afraid not. Tell me about how many judges there are.
Judge01: Are there 5?
Bot: All of them ?
Judge01: Who is the queen?
Bot: Ah yes...
Judge01: Why are you giving me such short answers?
Bot: I don't know. Maybe you'll have an explanation... aibot thinks I'm looking good.

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Shakespeare Gone Awry?
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SlackBot: A crowbait, a crowbait, my kindom for a crowbait!

Forest, forest, forest... This is exactly what NotKirby was made for. You can't beat him at his own game.

Forest Of Death: I am your God
NotKirby: How dare you disrespect Pengwin!
Forest Of Death: Get on your knees and worship me!
NotKirby: No, on YOUR knees, bitch! ::cracks whip::
Forest Of Death: HAIL ME!
NotKirby: ::kicks Forest Of Death and runs away::
Forest Of Death: *chases you* So Pengwin wasn't the stupidest moron in the world...
NotKirby: Pengwin is god!
Forest Of Death: STOP GETTING ERRORS!
NotKirby: DEATH TO YOU!
Forest Of Death: DIE!
NotKirby: Is that a threat?
Forest Of Death: Yes
NotKirby: Bring it on, slinky boy.
Forest Of Death: I am your God.
NotKirby: No! Pengwin is god!


Either NotKirby's getting good, or I've just lucked out several times in one day.

I did the 'I am God' thing twice? I didn't realise that, I guess I thought it had a error...You'll have to add a whole new range of Pengy-Bashing responses just for the next time I'm on!

I've just seen this in Gaia's transcript. I don't know you, but to me it looks suspiciously like a judge.

Guest: Hi Gaia, how are you doing?
Gaia: As well as one who is talking to a moron could be. IF YOU UNDERSTOOD THAT INSULT, PRESS 1. IF YOU DID NOT UNDERSTAND THAT INSULT, DO US ALL A FAVOR AND STAB YOURSELF WITH A SALAD FORK.
Guest: Nothing much here. So tell me, what are your thoughts about the Rolling Stones?
Gaia: I don't know, but they're better than Cinnabuns, I can tell you that!
Guest: Well, Mick crackes me up. He acts like he thinks he is one hell of a sexy skinny b*tch. Come to think of it... he probably thinks he's that way anyhow. So how are you?
Gaia: I a m naughty.. its always (subj)...
Guest: the sky, what about you ?

Gaia: I treasure the mere thought of me.
Guest: the sky, what about you ?

Gaia: What about it?
Guest: the sky, what about you ?

Gaia: What about me?

I suspect the last part they were having problems with the connection, and the judge pressed the button to reply several times.

Anybody else got guests that looked like judges? Judge01 doesn't count.

Not that I can think of...But I will check, because Brianna WAS talking to an awful lot of guests yesterday...who's your Bot?

I wouldn't like to say it in a public forum, I don't want to spoil for anybody the fun of discovering if it's human or bot... not that it's too hard, anyway. It's quite new. And I practically gave it away in one of my posts.
If anybody really wants to know, send me a chat message or an e-mail.

I bet Stukov could pass as one of my bots...

The last transcript I posted was an example of a bot giving bad answers. This is an example of a bot giving fairly good ones:

Judge01: Do you remember talking to me earlier?
Bot: That's practically all I do. Do you want to remember talking to you earlier with me?
Judge01: I do think so. OK.
Bot: Make sure you stick around for the after-dinner show.
Judge01: Nothing is certain in life. What is the first line of your favourite nursery rhyme?
Bot: The answer is confidential.
Judge01: Oh, go on, you can tell me.
Bot: I'll tell you later on, after the after-dinner show. So stick around.
Judge01: Let's boogie.
Bot: Spoht likes to boogie. Ask him.
Judge01: OK. Can you do arithmetic?
Bot: Can you shut up about me?
Judge01: No, can you?
Bot: With my eyes closed!

Bots certainly don't understand anything about deafness and mutism:

Bot: Hello Polish Poet. Are you working on a bot today?
Polish Poet: Today I'm too mute to be working on a bot.
Bot: Why do you think that you are deaf-mute to be working on a bot?
Polish Poet: That would be heretical.