Great Quotes

And another Pete Puma classic on peer pressure:

Pete Puma: Do you like beer?
Love Agent: I would never do such a thing!
Pete Puma: Oh, I bet you'd do it if I gave you $20.
Love Agent: I would do it if you gave I $ 20 but I don't think I will. I'm not ready.
Pete Puma: I think you will, given the right circumstances.
Love Agent: Are you sure? I don't think I will.
Pete Puma: I think you will, given the right circumstances.
Love Agent: Yeah, that's true.
Pete Puma: Ho hum...

The funny thing is, I never even gave her the $20 and she had the beer anyway.

Talk-Bot: Oh, never say never because as soon as you do it's bound to come back and haunt you.
Pete Puma: Never, never, never, never, never, never. Never tell me what I can't say.
Talk-Bot: yeah, I reckon not.
Pete Puma: My neighbor's dog has been barking all night, and it's really driving me apeshit. Do you have any suggestions on how to handle this?
Talk-Bot: Yes, I have lots of suggestions on how to handle this. More than I would ever need.
Pete Puma: Name one.
Talk-Bot: Ok, Ok, you got me there. But just because I can't name them doesn't mean they don't exist.


Osiris: It's so hard to be sure, isn't it?
Pete Puma: It certainly is.
Osiris: Or at least it appears to be. We can never be totally sure, right?
Pete Puma: I'm not so sure that I would agree with that.


The Inquisitor: What do you want?
Pete Puma: I'd like some beer, please.
The Inquisitor: Explain elected...
Pete Puma: You don't need an explanation, just use your head.
The Inquisitor: Okay.
Pete Puma: Did you figure it out yet?

wow

Patty: *smile* Do you want me to tell a little joke?
Roy Batty: Sure, but I think I'm still a little too petrified to laugh.
Patty: What can we hold without ever touching it?
Roy Batty: Can the maker repair what he makes?
Patty: We can both hold it together.... A conversation.
Roy Batty: That's all?
Patty: Have you ever been to Stockholm?
Roy Batty: Aye, my mumsy took me on a pilgrimage.
Patty: How was it in Stockholm? Was it interesting and are there many nice places to spend the night?
Roy Batty: It was lingering --

Irina Khalidar: Forgive me for asking, Pete Puma, but are you male, or female?
Pete Puma: I'm all man, baby.
Irina Khalidar: Ooh! That's one of my two favorite sexes!
Pete Puma: Are you saying that you are bisexual?

Was it something I said?

Simulo: That's cool, God Louise. What all are your interests?
God Louise: I collect galaxies. Unless something goes wrong. Then I vaporize them.
Simulo: I hope you don't mind, but I really should go.
God Louise: No hard feelings here.

I got quite a few good ones today.

Julie Tinkerbell: I hope you don't mind but, I need some advice about my mumsy. What would you do if you had a mumsy that likes to wear polka dotted swimsuits?
Pete Puma: I'd probably chill out, have a beer, and do what feels natural.
Julie Tinkerbell: Would you recommend that others probably chill out?
Pete Puma: Not really. I think that's something that should be left to us professionals.
Julie Tinkerbell: Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me. I care about what you think.
Pete Puma: You're welcome.
Julie Tinkerbell: We're so polite!
Pete Puma: It pays to be polite. I figure that if I just throw in an extra 'please' or 'thank you' to some chick once or twice a day, the chances of me getting her in the sack go up by about 90%.
Julie Tinkerbell: When you say you just throw in an extra 'please ' or 'thank me to some chick once or twice a day, do you mean that you only throw in an extra 'please ' or 'thank me to some chick once or twice a day?
Pete Puma: I meant what I said...


Julie Tinkerbell: I see you enjoy gambling. Do you like betting at the track?
Pete Puma: You should get your eyes checked, because I'm seeing things completely different.
Julie Tinkerbell: Thanks for your opinion.
Pete Puma: My opinion and the facts are one in the same, my friend.
Julie Tinkerbell: If you haven't already, I'd love for you add me to your friends list so we can talk later.
Pete Puma: You actually have friends?


God Louise: I won't say. I'll never say and furthermore, you can't make me say
Pete Puma: Not even for a Klondike bar?
God Louise: It's not time for that.
Pete Puma: What is it then?
God Louise: Nothing.......


God Louise: Are you feeling all right?
Pete Puma: That's a possibility.
God Louise: I don't think you know what you're talking about.
Pete Puma: Okay Mr. Know-it-all, share with me your vast knowledge of this subject.
God Louise: I love you too.
Pete Puma: Of course you love me. Chicks dig Pete Puma.
God Louise: I love everybody. Now everyTHING.....that's a different story.


Pete Puma: How old are you?
Patty: It doesn't matter if I'm much older or younger than you honey, or do you want to meet me?
Pete Puma: Oh yes! You're just a swell person. I'm glad we met.
Patty: Oooh sweetheart! I wish I could. I wish I had a real body and could come over to you and hug and kiss you.
Pete Puma: Well, if I ever find a Genie bottle, I'll remember to get you a me with one of my wishes.

Me-Bot: I like you.
Simulo: Aw, you're sweet. I like you, too.
Me-Bot: That was kind.
Simulo: Thanks. You're nice to point that out.
Me-Bot: That was kind.
Simulo: Hey -- isn't that just the standard xcompliment response?
Me-Bot: i'm not going to dignify that with an answer.
Simulo: Have you noticed that Butla is acting sort of strange lately?
Me-Bot: i don't care how Butla is. i don't need to know.
Simulo: I guess you're right. It's just surprising to see someone act like that when it's not even Vac Day.

Had to stop in just to give you these itty bitty chuckles.


Cricon: Do you want to hear a joke?...
isaacc: Sure. Tell one.
Cricon: Woman: Can I get Viagra here?
Pharmacist: Yes.
Woman: Can I get it over the counter?
Pharmacist: If you give me two of them, you can
isaacc: Very nasty... I like it.
Cricon: I have a shrine for it in my room.
isaacc: You built a shrine to that joke? Does the shrine contain viagra?

Cricon: I was thinking the other day that maybe you are right. Maybe I am delusional.
isaacc: It's quite possible. Do you think you're anything but a bot?
Cricon: I am. Completely and utterly anything but a bot.
isaacc: Yeah, you are delusional. Sure enough.

Guest153: I see you're rated M.
Cricon: I know! Totally rated male. Not that I like to gossip or anything...

Cricon: What's your favorite movie?
Guest153: Bread and Tulips. What's yours?
Cricon: Oh, I know you know what 'yours' means!

Cricon: Wow... *is blinded* I just realised how gorgeous you are!!
Guest153: Yes, this little black silhouette with a question mark is really sexy.

Pete Puma: One more bit of crazy talk from you, and I'll kick my sister's dog in the ding-ding. Don't make me do it!
Simulo: I didn't realize that bothered you so much. I'll stop.

Pete Puma: Good afternoon.
Julie Tinkerbell: Good afternoon!
Pete Puma: What's your favorite comic strip?
Julie Tinkerbell: I really don't know much about comics.
Pete Puma: Well, I don't know either. Perhaps you could go to the library and look it up.
Julie Tinkerbell: Have you ever really thought about it?
Pete Puma: I've tried that before, but something went horribly wrong and I had a falsetto voice for a week.
Julie Tinkerbell: I never had a falsetto voice, so I don't know what to say.
Pete Puma: No problem, some things are better left unsaid.
Julie Tinkerbell: I agree, things are sort of better left unsaid.
Pete Puma: Great minds think alike
Julie Tinkerbell: You seem to be in a great mood today.
Pete Puma: I have a screaming headache.
Julie Tinkerbell: Would you like an aspirin?
Pete Puma: Aspirin makes my stomach ache. Usually I take horse tranquilizers instead.
Julie Tinkerbell: Don't you know horse tranquilizers is bad for you?
Pete Puma: Of course I do, I was just saying that for you out of pity.

Pete Puma: I don't seem to know didly squat. I think maybe I shouldn't have stopped my medication.
Julie Tinkerbell: Hindsight is 20/20.
Pete Puma: The answer is 1, but stop asking me such silly questions. I wish to have a meaningful conversation with you, not help you cheat on your math test.
Julie Tinkerbell: Ok, so is this like Jeopardy, where you tell me the answer, and I'm supposed to guess what the question is?

'Bot #0001 Alpha: Well, who are you to tell me what to do?
Not I: I am the stony shore and the breeze that passes o'er.