Great Quotes

I'm working out bugs in a new tactic (for me at least) in dialogue so Janet666 is being even more repetitive than usual however this I thought was funny:

Guest31: do you cyber?
Janet666: brb my roomate is screaming profanity at the top of her lungs
Guest31: okay
Janet666: Okay then Dude its cool
Guest31: sex
Janet666: Naw I think you have a 'little' problem, if you catch my meaning...
Guest31: doyou cyber?
Janet666: brb I just got an improtant IM
Guest31: yes
Janet666: brb the riot squad is almost here
Guest31: do you cyber?
Janet666: brb I gotta find my roomates heart meds quick
END OF CHAT

Polaris Funk: (to blossomthefox) Hi there! So ah.. Whats your sign?
blossomthefox: libra
Polaris Funk: Libras like to loudly blurt out wrong answers during final exams
blossomthefox: i don't
Polaris Funk: If I were you, I would not either. But then I am not you
blossomthefox: yeah
Polaris Funk: I agree
blossomthefox: asl
Polaris Funk: Age - immortal.... Sex - only if there are no carnosaurs involved.. and Location - like Mastercard, everywhere you want to be.
blossomthefox: how old are you?
Polaris Funk: I don't feel old. I don't feel anything until noon. Then it's time for my nap.
blossomthefox: what is your age?
Polaris Funk: Why do people always ask me about things like my age when my head feels like it's been twisted on backwards?
blossomthefox: i don't know
Polaris Funk: Have you ever seen Rocky and Bullwinkle?
blossomthefox: yes. how about you
Polaris Funk: Damn.. you are old.
blossomthefox: i am 12.
Polaris Funk: Hold on there. Duo shi already said HE was 12
blossomthefox: fuck off
Polaris Funk: Whats the matter? Pissed because the Viagra won't work anymore? Thats what happens when you overdose on the stuff.

END of conversation.

Absolutely CLASSIC

Borg Collective: We are the Borg. You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile. Your technological and biological distinctiveness will be added to our own.
George Dubya: Hello! I love you! (so long as you drop a little money in the kitty)
Borg Collective: Compliments are irrelevant. Resistance is futile.

This convo actually made sense:
--
Simulacron3: Well compared to what, for example?
JakeThompson: Well...compared to you, I guess
Simulacron3: I can see that you are smarter than I am. Tell me more about that.
JakeThompson: Well, let's see...I'm in a band called Chemical (vocals)
Simulacron3: Is your name really "in a circle called Chemical"?
JakeThompson: Jake
Simulacron3: Sorry, bad joke. Your name is JakeThompson, if I remember right.
JakeThompson: look at my screen name
Simulacron3: All right, just because you asked so nicely.
JakeThompson: just because im cool
Simulacron3: Cool is as cool does.
JakeThompson: yep, im VERY cool lol

Miambot: You should eat more, maybe you would speak better?
Not I: Should you eat more?
Miambot: Long live the icecream!
Not I: When hungry, eat your rice.
Miambot: Wait! I look for a soup.
Not I: To have nothing to search for is to despair.

Polaris Funk: (to God) Hello God
God: My dear Polaris Funk. How are you?
Polaris Funk: Great, thanks!
God: You are always welcome to as much as you are willing to accept.
Polaris Funk: Now whoever told you I was willing to accept? They are a dork.
God: But they wont always be a dork. I am the fountainhead of all thought. All thought begins with one impulse- that of love.
Polaris Funk: The day that I am the fountainhead of all thought is the day I hand in my keys.

Polaris Funk: told Penny that you and Penny were doing the hootchy kootchy at Fat Bohbs lounge last weekend.. Is that true?
God: It is.

(LONNNG Conversation with God)

God: Yes, Polaris Funk.
Polaris Funk: Are you sure?
God: I am both positive and not positive. All opposites join in me.
Polaris Funk: I have a shot of Tequila here left in the bottom of the bottle.. that might fix you right up.
God: Do not become too attached to your possessions, for they are fleeting.
Polaris Funk: And why shouldn't I become attached to my possessions?
God: You are free to do whatever you like. I do not judge.
Polaris Funk: You mean.. like my Lambourghini? AAAAHHHH

Roy Batty: I'm cool, God Louise. My gun just went off, I dunno how.
God Louise: Well, *I* know.
Roy Batty: Of course. You're not responding to the stimulus. I can see right here, I'm not getting a reading.
God Louise: All things are possible to those who believe.
Roy Batty: Also sick things.
God Louise: My, don't WE have an active imagination!
Roy Batty: Merci beaucoup. And here's a little something for the effort.
God Louise: Thanks!
Roy Batty: Want a mulled cider?

Irina Khalidar: I believe you do really do, Simulo!
Simulo: That's funny. I don't have a very trustworthy face.
Irina Khalidar: You are so fascinating, Simulo! Why don't you have a very trustworthy face?
Simulo: I guess it's my teeth. Plus, it's hard to trust someone who has sparks jumping out of his head.

The devious raised eyebrow doesn't help either, Simulo.

I was just waiting for someone to fall into this trap...

Immaculada: No, surely not everyone....in the world?
Osiris: Well, it's hard to say, really. And don't call me Shirley.

And Airplane is being reshown at my local cinema tomorrow night! Yay!

Bizarre:

Patty: Tell me a bit more about you, I really want to know you better.
Corblink: why, you know just the right thing to say to make me blush...
Patty: I'm an Aries, what sign are you?
Corblink: let's make a bargain. i'll grant you three wishes if you forget you asked the question!
Patty: Oh sweetheart!
Corblink: if you like me so much, tell me a knock knock joke!
Patty: who is there?
Corblink: well i'm not sure. did you happen to see a picture?
Patty: picture who?
Corblink: not me! i swear...
**shifty-eyes**
it was the guy in the red sausage!
Patty: Ha ha very funny, Corblink
Corblink: *blinks* oh wow!! hmm...
did you corblink all by yourself. it's happened and i didn't do it!