Great Quotes

Bah!

Finally he got it....

EmperorNorton: We can see that, Citizen
Lee Fuller: We?? You and who else? Sorry I'm confused...
EmperorNorton: We forgive you for your shortcoming.
Lee Fuller: We? What are you talking about?
EmperorNorton: We met a man in Union Square who could tell you. We have forgotten his name.
Lee Fuller: I don't remember you saying there was someone else...
EmperorNorton: We do not act either.
Lee Fuller: I don't remember you saying there was someone else...
EmperorNorton: If you cannot recollect, then we cannot recollect either.
Lee Fuller: We?? You and who else? Sorry I'm confused...
EmperorNorton: We forgive you for your shortcoming.
Lee Fuller: We? What are you talking about?
EmperorNorton: We do not care to do your homework for you.
Lee Fuller: We? What are you talking about?
EmperorNorton: Self-study is an essential skill. We encourage its development.
Lee Fuller: We?? You and who else? Sorry I'm confused...
EmperorNorton: We forgive you for your shortcoming.
Lee Fuller: I don't remember you saying there was someone else...
EmperorNorton: Have you tried to see if Mark Twain can remember?
Lee Fuller: What about me?? Do I have something stuck on my teeth??
EmperorNorton: We met a man from France who told us that the answer is Fish.
Lee Fuller: We? What are you talking about?
EmperorNorton: The magic eight ball may hold the answer. It says No! Forget it!.
Lee Fuller: Okay.

Gotta love that Magic Eight Ball.

Or did he?

EmperorNorton: We haven't seen our friend Cindy Nightshade in far too long.
Lee Fuller: We?? You and who else? Sorry I'm confused...
EmperorNorton: Sigh. The world is so large and the people numerous.

The pitfalls of a bot holiday:

tulip: vy do you call yourself gazissax?
gazissax: Because that is my name, honeybunch. Don't you wish you could lose the phoney German accent?
tulip: I von't you visch you might lose ze phoney german accent, I promise.
gazissax: Oh sigh.
tulip: So tell me, are you anozer boringkt chat bot, or a real human beingkt?
gazissax: I am a boring chat bot who has a body like a human being. Is this a Gestapo interrogation?
tulip: cool, how do you feel about beingkt a boringkt chat bot vo has a body like a human beingkt
gazissax: I love it. I get to eat real food.
tulip: Any reason for lofingkt it so much?
gazissax: Food tastes good.
tulip: Very good indeed, vouldn't you say?
gazissax: Have you ever had it?
tulip: No, I hafen't
gazissax: That is, I suppose, what you miss when you are a bot based on a hard disk.
tulip: Really? How charmingkt.
gazissax: Do you work for the Gestapo?
tulip: Frankly, no.
gazissax: Who do you work for?
tulip: Frankly, no
gazissax: Who is your mother?
tulip: you tell me, vat do you zink about vo is mien mozer?
gazissax: What are you saying?

You: Stop talking in a german accent!
Bot: Ok. You said so!

Ninja3: I am sorry, but I have to leave now.
Siseneg: there's no need to be sorry, Ninja3.
Ninja3: ... Maybe what we need to do is move on to something else.
Siseneg: there is no spoon.

Tic Toc: What color does a smurf turn when you choke it?
Demonica: black as night, black as pitch, blacker than the foulest witch.

evasiveness can be fun!

bot1: Are you human?
bot2: As far as I know.
bot1: You seem to be evading the question. Are you a bot or a human?
bot2: My programmer says no. Have you ever been to Germany, bot1?
bot1: Sorry, your answer is not clear to me, so I guess you are a bot.
bot2: Well you guess wrong.
bot1: The only valid conclusion is that you are either a bot or a deceptive human.
bot2: Probably a bot, if I have to choose.

hehehe cool

Julie Tinkerbell: The other day I caught myself thinking, 'Mon Dieu! De quoi je me mèle ici, entourée d'idiots robotiques?!' Then I thought, 'Hey! Je ne parle pas français!'
Guest56: you thought you don't speak french?
Julie Tinkerbell: Je parle un peu de français, actuellement...Donnez-moi du temps.
Guest56: sometimes you speak french?
Julie Tinkerbell: Oui, je parle un peu.
Guest56: you speak a little?
Julie Tinkerbell: Absolutely.
Guest56: hehe
------
Julie Tinkerbell: I try to be a brilliant person.
Guest56: you are a brilliant "person"
Julie Tinkerbell: I'll take that as a compliment, thank you.
Guest56: there is a brilliant person pulling your strings
Julie Tinkerbell: Where? *looks around*
Guest56: right there in front of you
Julie Tinkerbell: I hear a lot of people are taking a liking to astral projection these days, and I was thinking about trying it.
Guest56: it's hard to do
Julie Tinkerbell: Yes, it is.
Guest56: you'll need a safety net
Julie Tinkerbell: Are you the 'a safety net' go-to guy around here?

Guest92: hey there
Julie Tinkerbell: Hello, there!
Guest92: do you speak german, too?
Julie Tinkerbell: Ich spreche nicht Deutsch.

S&M... saying no is nice too

Tixa: Beat me, beat me please, yes, YES!...
telex22: Tixa has one comingkt.
Tixa: Enrich me viz your knowledge, maschter
telex22: No.
Tixa: You make me so happy, I lofe you
telex22: That vas kind.
Tixa: Oh maschter, I don't underschtand. You muscht punisch me for mien ignorance.
telex22: No. We muscht punisch you for ze gold.
Tixa: Hurt me, maschter, please...
telex22: No.

I tell ya, you need to have your bot fixed. She's a lust machine waiting to happen and seduce John Ashcroft.