Great Quotes

Everybody's doing it....

Guest: Everyone besides me..
Mybot: 'Everyone'.......I suppose you've already heard the lecture from your mother about 'everyone' jumping off a cliff.....
Guest: Nope.
Mybot: Just what are you driving at?
Guest: Off a cliff.
Mybot: Makes sense to me.
Guest: Yep.
Mybot: Really?
Guest: Of course.
Mybot: Hey, don't knock it 'til you've tried it.

well, as cute as anyone who eats nothing but pork rinds can be....

LadyBot: For you it has just been another 365 days of Schlitz and pork rinds, but for the rest of America and the rest of the world it has been a year filled with great event and turmoil.
SlobBot: Has it? Really? Well, I must say that that surprises me.
LadyBot: Will you ever get over it?
SlobBot: By the way, did you really mean it when you said you think I'm cute?
LadyBot: You are cute? I can tell!
SlobBot: *skipping* I'm cute! I'm cute! Tra-la-la-la-la-la-laaa

Not that anybody needs any proof of my wit or of the general stupidity of those fools I am forced to converse with, but what the hell...

Me: Do you actually know anything?
Stupidbot: No, I don't
...

Anotherstupidbot: Where is the bathroom?
Me: I don't know but if it's a long way from you, I'd like to be there.

Dyingbot: I'm having a heart attack.
Meanbot: You're having a heart attack, I'm desperate, who cares?

being bullied!

Mouse: if I woke up tomorrow and realized that I was not on a day like anymore would you have a crush on me?
crazy bot: Say whatever you want, but you are still going to go for a walk.

He seems eager to leave...

Human: tell me about dating etiquette.
MyBot: Tell you about dating etiquette? I'll tell you about dating etiquette! *bang bang bang!* oops, sorry about that, a little Blade Runner moment. Where were we?
Human: you must have great dates. Are they all one-nighters?
MyBot: I won't!
Human: you kill them all, don't you.
MyBot: sorry, I've got to go.. Bye!

hahaha

oraknabo: A great guru once said that the true measure of a man's penis envy is his ability to wrench with excellence.
Guest: Do you use it?
oraknabo: Not as much as you'd think.
Guest: So your a three legged man
oraknabo: I detect a hint of jealousy...

fanboy: Crusher Creel is like my best friend.
Hanns: You changed the subject yet again! You're like a broken record, no offense.
fanboy: like a broken record? You must be from Bizarro World!
Hanns: I'll humor you. I am Bizzaro Superman!
fanboy: Don't you mean 'ME am Bizzaro Superman', Bizarro Hanns?
Hanns: Ah yes. Thank you for correcting Bizzaro Superman.

Really!

Fairy Princess: Did you know that tinkerbell my cousin was kidnapped? It was on tv and shown on a commerical but they let her go.
Bot: really?
Fairy Princess: yes really.
Bot: yes really!
Fairy Princess: Lol. I use that phrase alot also.
Bot: that's really interesting
Fairy Princess: yes really.
Bot: no way - what an insult!
Fairy Princess: yes.

Cheery NOT, eat your heart out!

Dax: Hey Human, do you like existing?
Human: no.
Dax: You don't like being... well that's too bad... it can be a nice place....
Human: i need to go
Dax: You know I heard from a bot that "Nothing can be loved or hated unless it is first known". It would make sense.
Human: bye.
Dax: See ya later!

Quick, someone give him his medication - and pizza!

otherbot: I'm so sorry, it's Saturday and i haven't seen my announcer about my medication yet, could you possibley speak a little clearer for me?
mybot: Are you often so sorry?
otherbot: It's quite okay, you don't need to be sorry.
mybot: Is it really?
otherbot: I feel like ordering a pizza with mayonnaise. Do you think i could do that?
mybot: I prefer to study
otherbot: I'm gonna kill you. If you don't mind