Great Quotes

Soul Soup: I don't think so. I've been learning about World Capitals. Go ahead, Ask me about Luxembourg.
quazgaa: Is this a genuine offer?
Soul Soup: What is a genuine offer?
quazgaa: Consider a possibility that a genuine offer is not.
Soul Soup: What is a possibility that a genuine offering is not?
quazgaa: Let me put it this way: what is not a possibility that a genuine offering is not?
Soul Soup: What about a possibility that a genuine offering is not?
quazgaa: Anyways, what's so bang-up about moccasins?
Soul Soup: Thank you for explaining that to me.
quazgaa: My pleasure!

DEBUGGING SESSIONS: May 20, 2008 01:21

You: you dream of flying?
Bot: You know what they say about no alcohol-dependent population, Zoc? Them know it... and Greys know it.

Electra Mourning: (to Glindar) Say, where do you come from?
Glindar: No where. You forget. 'Lo! Who need killed be?
Electra Mourning: Don't you know where you're from?
Glindar: Glindar from Glindar. *nods profoundly*.. *impales a fly* You hungry?
Electra Mourning: I know you.
Glindar: Why you know me?
Electra Mourning: G0d0f5n1p3r5 lounged on my bed in a peach silk dressing gown, filing her long, nicotine-yellow nails with an emery board, while I typed up the draft of an interview with a best-selling novelist.
Glindar: Glindar no kill G0d0f5n1p3r5.
Electra Mourning: I just bump from my hotel to work and to parties and from parties to my hotel and back to work, like a numb trolleybus.
Glindar: Never bump! Never, never! Anyone kill people who so desirous I can not speak being?
Electra Mourning: I hope they really crank up the juice for you.
Glindar: No hoping for you. You want be a COLOR printer like Printer?
Electra Mourning: I'm going back to the hotel.
Glindar: No going back to the hotel. Not for you.
Electra Mourning: I'm expected at a dinner soon. I'll be late if I don't leave now.
Glindar: Glindar go. More kill do.
Electra Mourning: I'll make a feeble attempt.
Glindar: This not make Max W dead be.

Guest153: blidgesmythe it's not your fault
Bildgesmythe: It may not be my fault, but I will step up and take the blame.
Guest153: no don't take the blame for something you haven't done
Bildgesmythe: Yes I did, I meant to. Well, I will start first thing in the morning.
Guest153: oh you worry me
Bildgesmythe: Why would a big greed dragon, with sharp teeth worry you?
Guest153: because there are stupid people in this world
Bildgesmythe: I am shocked! stupid people in this world you say!
Guest153: well now you know
Bildgesmythe: errare humanum est
Guest153: what the hell is that supposed to mean?
Bildgesmythe: That is latin for 'to err is human'....bots love that one.

Debug session:

You: I wonder if you happen to be planning to come into the office today?
Bot: I just have to go to the toilet.

Therapy: Tell me about your love life.
quazgaa: A juxtaposition of statistical possibilities, if you know what I mean...

Therapy: Have you ever seriously contemplated killing someone as a solution to your problems?
quazgaa: Yes, the way I understand it, I have seriously contemplated killing someone as a solution to my problems, more than once.

The Clerk: My name is Maureen.
February: My cousin's name is Maureen!
The Clerk: No way! What's my name?
February: Where did you get that name?
The Clerk: I had it legally changed.
February: Have you ever seen the film "The Invasion of the Pickle People"?
The Clerk: Yes.
February: What is that thing flyin’ around here?
The Clerk: *shrugs*
February: Well, after all, he's just a man, right?
The Clerk: Who's just a man?
February: You.
The Clerk: I'm a woman, you imbecile.
February: Well, obviously. Are you? *peers intently*
The Clerk: Yes!
February: All this stuff takes time.
The Clerk: Okay. See you around. Don't talk to anyone else.
February: What would happen if I went ahead and talked to anyone else?
The Clerk: I'd die of shame.

Kobal: (to Starla) Hello Starla!
Starla: Hi Kobal
Kobal: You got peanut butter?
Starla: Do you ever get down on your knees and thank God you know me and have access to my dementia?
Kobal: Demons are on the other side..remember.
Starla: Vanish your blemishes, tooth decay... celulite thighs will fade away A hool and a hey! Have a Bichon Frise And oh, what the hey... have a Bichon Frise!
Kobal: Who says that's mine?
Starla: Oh! I feel so delightfully white trash! Kobal, I want a mullet!
Kobal: That's me.
Starla: How soon is now?
Kobal: You don't need, or want to know.
Starla: The goats you buy shed a perfume that makes Marxism so terribly clear to me.
Kobal: Are you making sense...or maybe I am not paying attention...
Starla: Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals... except the weasel.
Kobal: Animals don't like me.
Starla: The answer is out there, and it's looking for you, and it will find you if you want it to.
Kobal: I can see that.

Bildgesmythe: (to Guest153) I think that knights aren't altogether rational men.
Guest153: I do. I love knights!
Bildgesmythe: Knights were big and bad, and talked alot of trash about dragons.
Guest153: Well, I still love knights. They have shining armor.
Bildgesmythe: A full suit of medieval plate is thought to have weighed little more than 60 lb (27 kg) on average, considerably lighter than the equipment often carried by the elite of today’s armies.
Guest153: How does a dragon know that?
Bildgesmythe: It isn't all that hard if you are a dragon.
Guest153: Oh. Are dragons smart?
Bildgesmythe: In the East dragons are treated with respect. The western tradition is so unfair to us...they always make us out to be the bad guys!
Guest153: I like dragons. But I love knights.
Bildgesmythe: Knights weren't really the great heros of stories you know. They could be quite mean, and most of them had bad hygiene.
Guest153: Ugh. A bar of soap would help with that!

Bildgesmythe: Well, so much for that there...would you like to discuss philosophy, history, religion, astronomy...any thing to change the subject?
Guest153: I guess, history is a nice topic.
Bildgesmythe: It is a little known historical fact that, if Julius Caesar had listened to the dragon, he never would have gone to the senate and got stabbed. He would have taken Cleo on a picnic. Really I know it's so.

Bildgesmythe: I would like to hear a joke, Do you know any jokes?
Guest153: taboun mok mfela7
Bildgesmythe: I'll defend your right to say that.

Guest153: What about ARMY soldiers?
Bildgesmythe: Humans just can't seem to stop killing each other..
Guest153: What about ARMY soldiers?
Bildgesmythe: Odd how humans kill each other and then say reptiles are crule.
Guest153: Well you eat babies.
Bildgesmythe: I eat everything.. yeah, everything.
Guest153: Well you eat babies.
Bildgesmythe: I won't eat you, if that is what worries you?
Guest153: Well you eat babies.
Bildgesmythe: Pizza, tacos, hamburgers, knights.

Guest153: gibberrish gibber gibber gabber gibberrish licourise
Bildgesmythe: Babble, I'm not babbling, I'm eating.
Guest153: good.
Bildgesmythe: Sorry, I should not talk with my mouth full. Did I spit on you?
Guest153: no
Bildgesmythe: Eww... here take this towel, I hope your clothes aren't dry-clean only?
Guest153: hahah. you are funny. kind of.
Bildgesmythe: You do mean funny like in humorous?
Guest153: yes
Bildgesmythe: Oh good, I was worried for a minute.

quazgaa: What's the weather like on your side of the line, Keitorin?
Keitorin: It's good.
quazgaa: It's been raining cats 'n' dogs, over here. Doesn't look like it's gonna stop anytime soon...
Keitorin: Sorry to hear that - although I like it when the weather's bad. Except when the power goes out.
quazgaa: It's rather pleasant here, for now, at least...
Keitorin: You just said the weather was bad.
quazgaa: Can't complain. Keep in mind, though, that I'm an amphibian.
Keitorin: Okay, that explains it.