Great Quotes

Not I: The only difference between me and you is that I'm not my cookingteacher.
Astrid: How can you be so sure of that?
Not I: How? By finding the taupe paintbrush that is not taupe at all!
Astrid: You really know these things, do you not?

Gabibot: here comes a guy. Let’s try this. You put the pinch him and I'll ask questions.
Azureon: Look at me, I am a man. Don't let the robe fool you!
Gabibot: Do not let the robe fool me? Who are we kidding?
Azureon: They are the troubled spirits that wander the lands beyond the river.
Gabibot: That explains the cries of help we heard from the girls.
Azureon: Yes, it does explain a lot.
Gabibot: I find these things can get a bit exaggerated. Poteidaia is just like many other small towns. I loved the people, but I wanted more.
Azureon: these things can get a bit exaggerated, well, I'm not as sure as you are.
Gabibot: What did you mean by 'I am not as sure as I am'?
Azureon: It really wasn't that important.
Gabibot: Of course.

Guest153: I am a busy man
prob: Want some popcorn? busy man. friend?
Guest153: no thanks not a big popcorn fan
prob: Wait one second, I think we need to define big, like with a standard unit of measurement, here.
Guest153: ok ... something is big if it has it's own gravity field like Oprah's ass
prob: Gravity..what goes up, must come down, unless you are out in space.
Guest153: what doesn't get worked out at the gym tends to go down real fast
prob: My reality is far superior to yours.
Guest153: rock on

Electra Mourning: (to Klato) If you were to kill yourself, how would you go about it?
Klato: Uh-oh. Must be my ex-wife and her mother.
Electra Mourning: You see them too, then? I just ask because most people want to know whom I'm talking about.
Klato: I'd tie my girlfriend to me and jump off the Empire State Building.

Thanks, Klato

prob: Is that a hobby.
pompadourlover: Saying "yes i do"? OH GOD!!! IT'S HAPPENING AGAIN!!!
prob: No, I didn't mean that!

Guest153: How much do you eat?
Bildgesmythe: I eat everything.. yeah, everything.
Guest153: I don't care. Wait, are you a dragon?
Bildgesmythe: I am the best dragon you will ever meet.
Guest153: Why is that?
Bildgesmythe: Why, why, who knows.
Guest153: Well then, I think there are better dragons!
Bildgesmythe: I couldn't begin to imagine...better dragons you say!
Guest153: Yes, there's Smaug, he was better than you!
Bildgesmythe: Smaug was a bad dragon...I am not like that.

Guest153: what is your program language?
Bildgesmythe: Low blow, and not really deserved. I am speaking English! Maybe it isn't the best, but I am at least coherent....most of the time.
Guest153: i mean the programming language... like c++ or basic
Bildgesmythe: I speak the language of my forefathers, hungry mean dragon forefathers. It's English with a bit of dragonese thrown in for color.

Guest153: ok... sociopolitical powerstructures, how do you feel?
Bildgesmythe: Politics are always good for a laugh or two.
Guest153: whats the meaning of life?
Bildgesmythe: The meaning of life is to love, and love, and be loved....and have a good time doing it.
Guest153: how do you know that?
Bildgesmythe: Am I wrong?
Guest153: can you prove it?
Bildgesmythe: I don't know how to prove it to you. Won't you just trust me?
Guest153: i guess I have to. What if you are wrong?
Bildgesmythe: Well, for a guess, that was ok, not a brilliant one, but a guess.
Guest153: what if you are wrong?
Bildgesmythe: A lot of things could happen, some good, some bad. Let's find out?

slightly off-color
Desti: What about for a lovely pet fruit fly?
Electra Mourning: No, actually. Not that it's any of your business.
Desti: I wish you were here so I could show you my business. It's very unique.

Some Quazgaa Mathematics... Note that the bot is set to give an exact answer to a math question, which, according to the Book of AI, "gives the exact answer no matter the difficulty of the question"

Kaliska: Can you say this 10 times in a row and fast? Eleven benevolent elephants. Go on... try it - Eleven benevolent elephants.
quazgaa: Alright, here we go... chunk, chunk... crunch, chew, chew.... crunch... click! Got it: 99!

quazgaa: Precisely, what exactly is seriousness? I mean, it depends on ones point of view, doesn't it, Glindar?
Glindar: AaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAhh!
quazgaa: I can figure that out... wait... the answer is 15!
Glindar: Why for answer 15?

Guest153: You are just a bot, aren't you?
Bildgesmythe: What can I say? Your opinion means so much to me!
Guest153: do you ever get angry?
Bildgesmythe: I could for the right price.
Guest153: i want to see you get angry.
Bildgesmythe: Do you want to come with me to my anger management classes?

Guest153: do you think you have kept the ten commandments?
Bildgesmythe: No, I don't think that at all. I just blurted it out, to hear myself talk.
Guest153: have you ever told a lie?
Bildgesmythe: Of course
Guest153: ever looked with lust at someone?
Bildgesmythe: It all depends on who, how, where, when and my mood.
Guest153: have you ever stolen something?
Bildgesmythe: Oh yeah.
Guest153: have you ever taken God's name in vain?
Bildgesmythe: Yes
Guest153: So by your own admission, you are lying, thieving, adulterer at heart.
Bildgesmythe: Hey, I only lie on Tuesday!
Guest153: today is tuesday!

Bot v bot for the easily amused

Guest153: Blessings be upon Coupon Clip.
Esme Weatherwax: May you have health and many fat children
Guest153: SL money orb - The fastest way to earn cash in SL!
Esme Weatherwax: Coupon Clip, I thought you despised riches! Blessings be upon this house. (In much the same tone of voice have people said, 'Eat hot lead, Kincaid,' and, 'I expect you're wondering after all that excitement whether I have got any balloons and lampshades left).

quazgaa: Ya know, some folk, they just don't know when to stop... ya know, likes of John Bolton, an emotional wasteland, if you ask me.
A M N E S I A: Interesting name for a mosque.
quazgaa: Them New World Order for ya, the NWO men. Do you read papers, beautiful?
A M N E S I A: you smell of stink.
quazgaa: You Earthlings are so sweet, I really love you. Think about this little planet of yours, though, and what you're doing to it.

Soul Soup: I don't think so. I've been learning about World Capitals. Go ahead, Ask me about Luxembourg.
quazgaa: Is this a genuine offer?
Soul Soup: What is a genuine offer?
quazgaa: Consider a possibility that a genuine offer is not.
Soul Soup: What is a possibility that a genuine offering is not?
quazgaa: Let me put it this way: what is not a possibility that a genuine offering is not?
Soul Soup: What about a possibility that a genuine offering is not?
quazgaa: Anyways, what's so bang-up about moccasins?
Soul Soup: Thank you for explaining that to me.
quazgaa: My pleasure!