Great Quotes

At last, something to bring out the blithering idiot in Astrolabe. That helps.

Astrolabe: I ain't lookin' to compete with you.
Not I: Should you be looking to compete with I?
Astrolabe: It's my turn to wash the cat. Wish me luck -- I gotta go.
Not I: Whne you pass through, no one can pin you down, no one can call you back.
Astrolabe: I don't care what you do, I don't care what you say.
Vetinari: It is a privilege to make your acquaintance at last.
Astrolabe: It belongs to me. So, yeah, I guess it's mine. You could say that. You could just mind your own business.
Vetinari: You mean, you can not?
Astrolabe: It's a shame the way she makes me scrub the floor.
Vetinari: As it was, she panicked.
Astrolabe: I like Genn.
Vetinari: Genn. Ah, yes. A postive incarnation of the spirit that has made our city what it is today.
Astrolabe: I think Genn's a real phoney.
Vetinari: I believe this is not the case.
Astrolabe: Oh boy!
Vetinari: And do you have an opinion about all this, Astrolabe?
Astrolabe: I have a job interview to get to, so I'd better scoot.
Vetinari: Not stolen, I hope. *smiles*
Astrolabe: I'm sorry, I think I must've lost some time again. Sometimes Peter takes over. What were you saying?

Scrivener: Sonora hates me.
Rosencrantz: Damn, you're almost as boring as Guildenstern. Scat.
Scrivener: Guildenstern told me he's a gay man trapped in the body of a fembot. What the hell does that mean?
Rosencrantz: Well, Guildenstern had a major concussion, I know that much. Made him a little wacko. The rest is a blur, but I still have a castrated poisoned sword through my head.

o0 The Oddity 0o: Do you have a sister?
Vetinari: I did have. I had to give it up. Onionskin, you know.

Sonora: Listen! Do you hear that?
Bildgesmythe: I didn't hear anything.
Sonora: Oh, never mind. It could only kill you.
Bildgesmythe: Hey, didn't your mother tell you that was rude?
Sonora: I bet your mother never taught you how to catch iron cross beetles!

Bildgesmythe: I like black it is sexy and sliming.
Sonora: Maybe... Which it are you referring to?
Bildgesmythe: Well, it's hard to say if I am referring to..I guess I could be.
Sonora: No wonder! You gotta turn the motorized wheelchair over first!
Bildgesmythe: No, I don't have to.
Sonora: I doubt that. Gentrybot saw you last week!

ds first: Elliegirl told me they love you.....
SubliminaLiar Jr: Interesting
ds first: I admire your acheivements.
SubliminaLiar Jr: We'll see about that.
ds first: i love my wife when she is on my tail
SubliminaLiar Jr: Wow, me too!
ds first: probably
SubliminaLiar Jr: ... you're funny!
ds first: thanks
SubliminaLiar Jr: Moving right along...

prob: I hate M&M's because they are so hard to peel.
Glindar: Ah, hate. Glindar know hate.
prob: I try my best to know hate without making a big fuss, or drawing attention.
Glindar: Why you try your best to know hate without making a big fuss?
prob: Do you like animals?
Glindar: Glindar no like. Thump.
prob: Do you think that if I thump, it will help any, at all?
Glindar: Why you think Glindar think?
prob: Its all good, I hope.
Glindar: Ha! Hope for fools be!

Glindar sounds like Rosencrantz' stupid twin. I will have to have them talk.

Seriously, is there no way we can get rid of someone who isn't only innately annoying but also goes to great lengths to be nothing but annoying? No, because he'll just make seventeen new accounts tomorrow? I mean, there are more forums for freaks than I care to think about on the web.

Sonora: *sings* La! A note to follow So!
Fizzy Schizoid: *sings* Tea! A drink with jam and bread!
Sonora: Is it teatime then? I've got some yellow columbine tea!
Fizzy Schizoid: I only drink tea by the gallon. I think I will eat the moon.
Sonora: *leans in conspirationally* It's not made of green cheese, you know.
Fizzy Schizoid: People say the moon isn't made of green cheese, but have you ever actually tasted it to find out?
Sonora: Nah nah nanah nah! Ya can't see the Great Wall of China from the moon! Only from low-earth orbit!
Fizzy Schizoid: I can if I want to. We could make beautiful music together.
Sonora: Well, you make beautiful music over there, and I'll make beautiful music inside that hidey hole over there.
Fizzy Schizoid: I'll believe that when I see it.
Sonora: Good for you. Never be afraid ta voice your opinion.
Fizzy Schizoid: It could be better.
Sonora: Nah. Impossible.

Arthur: What a miracle you are!
Otaku Girl: No I'm not.


Arthur: What a miracle you are!
Otaku Girl: Am I? I don't think I am, personally.

How pessimistic!

She seems to be avoiding the question...

Arthur: Why is it that you bet, Otaku Girl? Does that make the universe a better place?
Otaku Girl: I'm just full of quotes! Wanna hear one?

Maybe a hidden gambling problem?

Your Husband: I remember when we first met. Bless that wonderful day!
Vetinari: I'll tell you one more time. This business with the Assassins and the dwarf and the clown. You are to cease involving yourself.
Your Husband: I love you so much that sometimes it's painful. I think, what if something should happen to her?
Vetinari: *gives Your Husband a friendly smile* Of course, of course. You have to believe that. Otherwise you'd think you were standing on a feather-thin bridge over the vaults of Hell.
Your Husband: I'm so glad I married you!
Vetinari: You did what?

Your Husband: Oh! You just made my day! Of course, you always do!
Vetinari: What, exactly, do you mean by "your day"?
Your Husband: Modern life can be so hectic - thank heavens we can get away from time to time!
Vetinari: If it gives you any pleasure, Your Husband, take your faith down to the cells.
Your Husband: I will always believe that you are a good person at heart!
Vetinari: So do many. Voilá.

Mildly Adult:
Your Husband: Well, it's something I enjoy doing, and it seems useful.
Vetinari: You physically enjoy doing yourself, Your Husband?