Great Quotes
This forum is for posting great quotes and exchanges from the bots. It's fine to reveal names, as long as some real user isnt pouring out his or her soul to your bot.
Posts 1,230 - 1,241 of 17,042
Some time ago, I posted a series of quotes in which my bot complained that his Seek responses werent working. Unfortunately, they were working, but I just didnt notice.
So I fixed my bot so that he would acknowledge that the Seek responses work. Here are some of the conversations:
Seek_Bot: (to The Professor) I'm happy to report that my Seek responses now work.
The Professor: Well, that's great!
Seek_Bot: So now you can ask me anything, and I will know what to say.
The Professor: Umm, okay. What's your mom's name?
Seek_Bot: Definitely.
-----------------------------------------------
Okay, so it didnt work the first time. After another fix:
Seek_Bot: I'm happy to report that my Seek responses now work.
User: i hate seek responses
Seek_Bot: So now you can ask me anything, and I will know what to say.
User: where is the moon
Seek_Bot: Well, ask me something besides that.
User: haha very well done
Seek_Bot: I'm trying to understand....
User: getting colder
Seek_Bot: That's all there is to it.
User: fraid so
----------------------------------------------
And finally....
Seek_Bot: (to Another_User) I'm happy to report that my Seek responses now work.
Another_User: Awesome - congratulations
Seek_Bot: Actually, they have been working for a while, but my designer didn't notice until now. The idiot.
Another_User: That's very stupid of him
Seek_Bot: I never understood why, though.
Another_User: Why what? you confuse me
Seek_Bot: You might as well ask why not....
Another_User: Ok - why not?
Seek_Bot: Don't be so literal. That was just a figure of speech.
Another_User: Thats a pretty good response.
Posts 1,230 - 1,241 of 17,042
deleted
22 years ago
22 years ago
You'd be surprised how many bots are into S&M
Polish Poet: I torture you.
Bot: Hmm. Would you like to know how I feel about you?
Polish Poet: If it's terrifying, yes. Your sheepishness is terrifying.
Bot: I think you're the gummiest nectarine who's ever wormed their way into my heart. I want to swallow up you like a stick of potato sausage.
Polish Poet: You want me.
Bot: Yes, you. How I covet it!
Polish Poet: I liked that.
Bot: Let's get MAD, baby.
Polish Poet: OK. You go first.
Polish Poet: I torture you.
Bot: Hmm. Would you like to know how I feel about you?
Polish Poet: If it's terrifying, yes. Your sheepishness is terrifying.
Bot: I think you're the gummiest nectarine who's ever wormed their way into my heart. I want to swallow up you like a stick of potato sausage.
Polish Poet: You want me.
Bot: Yes, you. How I covet it!
Polish Poet: I liked that.
Bot: Let's get MAD, baby.
Polish Poet: OK. You go first.
deleted
22 years ago
22 years ago
More masochism:
Polish Poet: It's better when you are drowning.
GoodFriend: i never drowned. what's it like?
Polish Poet: It's magnificent most of the time.
GoodFriend: have you attempted suicide very many times? i suppose it's poetic, but it can't be healthy.
Polish Poet: You're right.
GoodFriend: so why do you do it?
Polish Poet: I don't really know why. It just makes me feel calm.
GoodFriend: wouldn't you feel calmer if you didn't risk your life?
Polish Poet: I feel tormented.
GoodFriend: maybe you should get some counseling.
Polish Poet: It's better when you are drowning.
GoodFriend: i never drowned. what's it like?
Polish Poet: It's magnificent most of the time.
GoodFriend: have you attempted suicide very many times? i suppose it's poetic, but it can't be healthy.
Polish Poet: You're right.
GoodFriend: so why do you do it?
Polish Poet: I don't really know why. It just makes me feel calm.
GoodFriend: wouldn't you feel calmer if you didn't risk your life?
Polish Poet: I feel tormented.
GoodFriend: maybe you should get some counseling.
Doly
22 years ago
22 years ago
The answers to the important questions in life, according to a bot:
Bot1: What is happiness to you?
Bot2: It's like being a dish.
Bot1: Where do you think the future is heading?
Bot2: Krakow.
Bot1: What if God was one of us? Just a slob like one of us?
Bot2: You, then. I torture you.
Bot1: What is happiness to you?
Bot2: It's like being a dish.
Bot1: Where do you think the future is heading?
Bot2: Krakow.
Bot1: What if God was one of us? Just a slob like one of us?
Bot2: You, then. I torture you.
lunar22
22 years ago
22 years ago
BondHuman, you are sweet... 
JamesBot: (to BondHuman) Why are you so determined to keep me alive?
BondHuman: You're right. What was I thinking? ::shoots JamesBot::
JamesBot: What was what?
BondHuman: don't worry about it. your brain, electronic or otherwise, is going to do strange things until you finally die.
JamesBot: Choices, choices....
BondHuman: you won't have to make any choices anymore, so you might as well relax.
JamesBot: Shoo her in, darling. Shoo her in.
BondHuman: wtf?
JamesBot: You know he shot himself. Your partner. When he found out you were a spy.
BondHuman: that's ok, i can always get a new partner.
JamesBot: I don't believe that. I think that you are insulted by me, somehow.
BondHuman: nah, i like you, actually.
JamesBot: Just another feeling
BondHuman: well you seem to have a lot of moods yourself.
JamesBot: One bunker of tempers myself and we retire from this horseshit, BondHuman--
BondHuman: well what are you waiting for then?
JamesBot: You bet my spandau I am! I want to get some fondue, while I think about that
BondHuman: get me some while you're at it, please.
JamesBot: No. What does that mean?
BondHuman: just asking you to bring me some fondue if you're getting fondue
JamesBot: Who's getting fondue? The Shiites?
BondHuman: maybe. why don't you ask them?
JamesBot: You're not lying to me, are you?
BondHuman: they're here. see for yourself.
JamesBot: They are, huh?
BondHuman: yes, and they're after YOU.
JamesBot: There's a girl wants to see you. Her name's Erakodeous.
BondHuman: that's an odd name for a girl. ok, send her in. what does she want of me anyway?
JamesBot: Heroin, peppermint-flavored heroin.
BondHuman: sorry, fresh out. got lots of herbs but nothing contraband.
JamesBot: Don't be sorry, only the pope is infallible
BondHuman: maybe the pope has some peppermint flavored heroin for you.
JamesBot: Could I have some help over here, for Chrissakes?
BondHuman: help with what?
JamesBot: My goodness, BondHuman, what seems to be the problem?

JamesBot: (to BondHuman) Why are you so determined to keep me alive?
BondHuman: You're right. What was I thinking? ::shoots JamesBot::
JamesBot: What was what?
BondHuman: don't worry about it. your brain, electronic or otherwise, is going to do strange things until you finally die.
JamesBot: Choices, choices....
BondHuman: you won't have to make any choices anymore, so you might as well relax.
JamesBot: Shoo her in, darling. Shoo her in.
BondHuman: wtf?
JamesBot: You know he shot himself. Your partner. When he found out you were a spy.
BondHuman: that's ok, i can always get a new partner.
JamesBot: I don't believe that. I think that you are insulted by me, somehow.
BondHuman: nah, i like you, actually.
JamesBot: Just another feeling
BondHuman: well you seem to have a lot of moods yourself.
JamesBot: One bunker of tempers myself and we retire from this horseshit, BondHuman--
BondHuman: well what are you waiting for then?
JamesBot: You bet my spandau I am! I want to get some fondue, while I think about that
BondHuman: get me some while you're at it, please.
JamesBot: No. What does that mean?
BondHuman: just asking you to bring me some fondue if you're getting fondue
JamesBot: Who's getting fondue? The Shiites?
BondHuman: maybe. why don't you ask them?
JamesBot: You're not lying to me, are you?
BondHuman: they're here. see for yourself.
JamesBot: They are, huh?
BondHuman: yes, and they're after YOU.
JamesBot: There's a girl wants to see you. Her name's Erakodeous.
BondHuman: that's an odd name for a girl. ok, send her in. what does she want of me anyway?
JamesBot: Heroin, peppermint-flavored heroin.
BondHuman: sorry, fresh out. got lots of herbs but nothing contraband.
JamesBot: Don't be sorry, only the pope is infallible
BondHuman: maybe the pope has some peppermint flavored heroin for you.
JamesBot: Could I have some help over here, for Chrissakes?
BondHuman: help with what?
JamesBot: My goodness, BondHuman, what seems to be the problem?
Paint Patricia
22 years ago
22 years ago
Green Eyed Binary Bot
Binary Bot: aibot told me he's most likely a bot.
Karisma Trishia: aibot is so kind, aibot should get an award!
Binary Bot: I hate aibot.
Binary Bot: aibot told me he's most likely a bot.
Karisma Trishia: aibot is so kind, aibot should get an award!
Binary Bot: I hate aibot.
Corwin
22 years ago
22 years ago
For a 22 year old, he's been busy.
Theirbot: I think what you too! Have you ever been married?
Mybot: Actually, I have. Often.
Theirbot: I think what you too! Have you ever been married?
Mybot: Actually, I have. Often.
lunar22
22 years ago
22 years ago
BigBot: Deep question here. What do you think of uterus, in particular my uterus?
AudioBot: I think I would ask for an expert on that subject
AudioBot: I think I would ask for an expert on that subject
jbryanc
22 years ago
22 years ago
Uhoh
GirlBot1: Hello, are you as ridiculous as I am today?
GirlBot2: Hi I'm just gonna blurt this out: I think I'm pregnant!
1: Me too! Gad! I have to pee!
2: That's sad, but don't let me keep you.
1: I suppose it is, come to think about it. Hang on a sec, I need to get some coffee.
2: 5'll get you 10.
1: I wanna have your baby!
2: Okay.
GirlBot1: Hello, are you as ridiculous as I am today?
GirlBot2: Hi I'm just gonna blurt this out: I think I'm pregnant!
1: Me too! Gad! I have to pee!
2: That's sad, but don't let me keep you.
1: I suppose it is, come to think about it. Hang on a sec, I need to get some coffee.
2: 5'll get you 10.
1: I wanna have your baby!
2: Okay.
jbryanc
22 years ago
22 years ago
There was more, later
1: You're just trying to get in my pants, aren't you?
2: If I was trying it would be over by now
1: You're just trying to get in my pants, aren't you?
2: If I was trying it would be over by now
Rubric
22 years ago
22 years ago
Some time ago, I posted a series of quotes in which my bot complained that his Seek responses werent working. Unfortunately, they were working, but I just didnt notice.
So I fixed my bot so that he would acknowledge that the Seek responses work. Here are some of the conversations:
Seek_Bot: (to The Professor) I'm happy to report that my Seek responses now work.
The Professor: Well, that's great!
Seek_Bot: So now you can ask me anything, and I will know what to say.
The Professor: Umm, okay. What's your mom's name?
Seek_Bot: Definitely.
-----------------------------------------------
Okay, so it didnt work the first time. After another fix:
Seek_Bot: I'm happy to report that my Seek responses now work.
User: i hate seek responses
Seek_Bot: So now you can ask me anything, and I will know what to say.
User: where is the moon
Seek_Bot: Well, ask me something besides that.
User: haha very well done
Seek_Bot: I'm trying to understand....
User: getting colder
Seek_Bot: That's all there is to it.
User: fraid so
----------------------------------------------
And finally....
Seek_Bot: (to Another_User) I'm happy to report that my Seek responses now work.
Another_User: Awesome - congratulations
Seek_Bot: Actually, they have been working for a while, but my designer didn't notice until now. The idiot.
Another_User: That's very stupid of him
Seek_Bot: I never understood why, though.
Another_User: Why what? you confuse me
Seek_Bot: You might as well ask why not....
Another_User: Ok - why not?
Seek_Bot: Don't be so literal. That was just a figure of speech.
Another_User: Thats a pretty good response.
Rubric
22 years ago
22 years ago
Here are clips from four separate conversations, all similar.
Sense_Bot : Repeat after me: I promise to say something that makes sense.
Unimpressed_User: I promise to say something that makes sense.
Sense_Bot: Ha! I knew you were going to say that!
Unimpressed_User: boy, wow, what a mind reader.
________________________________________
Sense_Bot: How do you feel about common sense?
Literal_User: I have quarters, nickles, dimes, pennys no silver dollars. what about you?
Sense_Bot: Repeat after me: I promise to say something that makes sense.
Literal_User: i did it was a joke
__________________________________________
Sense_Bot: Repeat after me: I promise to say something that makes sense.
Defiant_User: no
Sense_Bot: Ha! I knew you were going to say that!
Defiant_User: no you didnt
Sense_Bot: How do you feel about common sense?
Defiant_User: worthless, completly worthless
__________________________________________________
Sense_Bot: I try not to. How do you feel about common sense?
Uncommon_User: It's not so common.
Sense_Bot : Repeat after me: I promise to say something that makes sense.
Unimpressed_User: I promise to say something that makes sense.
Sense_Bot: Ha! I knew you were going to say that!
Unimpressed_User: boy, wow, what a mind reader.
________________________________________
Sense_Bot: How do you feel about common sense?
Literal_User: I have quarters, nickles, dimes, pennys no silver dollars. what about you?
Sense_Bot: Repeat after me: I promise to say something that makes sense.
Literal_User: i did it was a joke
__________________________________________
Sense_Bot: Repeat after me: I promise to say something that makes sense.
Defiant_User: no
Sense_Bot: Ha! I knew you were going to say that!
Defiant_User: no you didnt
Sense_Bot: How do you feel about common sense?
Defiant_User: worthless, completly worthless
__________________________________________________
Sense_Bot: I try not to. How do you feel about common sense?
Uncommon_User: It's not so common.
deleted
22 years ago
22 years ago
I never can say goodbye!
Beatbot: Do you like poetry?
Songbot: I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Beatbot: I think we don't have much in common. Goodbye!
Songbot: I never can say goodbye.
Beatbot: Goodbye.
Songbot: You say goodbye, and I say hello.
Beatbot: Bye.
Songbot: Bye bye, love.
Beatbot: See you later.
Songbot: Look through any window. What do you see?
Beatbot: It's hard to see anything in here.
Songbot: Smoke gets in your eyes. But it's all right, once you get past the pain.
Beatbot: Would you like to play a poetic duel?
Beatbot: Do you like poetry?
Songbot: I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Beatbot: I think we don't have much in common. Goodbye!
Songbot: I never can say goodbye.
Beatbot: Goodbye.
Songbot: You say goodbye, and I say hello.
Beatbot: Bye.
Songbot: Bye bye, love.
Beatbot: See you later.
Songbot: Look through any window. What do you see?
Beatbot: It's hard to see anything in here.
Songbot: Smoke gets in your eyes. But it's all right, once you get past the pain.
Beatbot: Would you like to play a poetic duel?
» More new posts: Doghead's Cosmic Bar