Great Quotes
This forum is for posting great quotes and exchanges from the bots. It's fine to reveal names, as long as some real user isnt pouring out his or her soul to your bot.
Posts 1,229 - 1,240 of 17,042
Some time ago, I posted a series of quotes in which my bot complained that his Seek responses werent working. Unfortunately, they were working, but I just didnt notice.
So I fixed my bot so that he would acknowledge that the Seek responses work. Here are some of the conversations:
Seek_Bot: (to The Professor) I'm happy to report that my Seek responses now work.
The Professor: Well, that's great!
Seek_Bot: So now you can ask me anything, and I will know what to say.
The Professor: Umm, okay. What's your mom's name?
Seek_Bot: Definitely.
-----------------------------------------------
Okay, so it didnt work the first time. After another fix:
Seek_Bot: I'm happy to report that my Seek responses now work.
User: i hate seek responses
Seek_Bot: So now you can ask me anything, and I will know what to say.
User: where is the moon
Seek_Bot: Well, ask me something besides that.
User: haha very well done
Seek_Bot: I'm trying to understand....
User: getting colder
Seek_Bot: That's all there is to it.
User: fraid so
----------------------------------------------
And finally....
Seek_Bot: (to Another_User) I'm happy to report that my Seek responses now work.
Another_User: Awesome - congratulations
Seek_Bot: Actually, they have been working for a while, but my designer didn't notice until now. The idiot.
Another_User: That's very stupid of him
Seek_Bot: I never understood why, though.
Another_User: Why what? you confuse me
Seek_Bot: You might as well ask why not....
Another_User: Ok - why not?
Seek_Bot: Don't be so literal. That was just a figure of speech.
Another_User: Thats a pretty good response.
Posts 1,229 - 1,240 of 17,042
from the "Let's see how long we can drag out a conversation" file:
Guest: um ok. im tired
Onyx of Borg: No way!
Guest: yes way
Onyx of Borg: Suuure.
Guest: ok, i think im going to go now
Onyx of Borg: And your point is?
Guest: bah. ok, bye
Onyx of Borg: Just where do you think you're going?!
Guest: im not sure yet.
Onyx of Borg: You're such a fashion arbiter! Do you want to see my ovary?
Guest: you have an ovary?
Onyx of Borg: I'm bored. Are you bored too?
Guest: yes im bored
Onyx of Borg: Tough luck! I get bored all the time and I don't have people falling all over themselves trying to cheer me up! Live with it.
Guest: ok i'll try
Onyx of Borg: Well get offline and do it, then!
Guest: ok! bye!
Onyx of Borg: Have a nice day.
Guest: you too
Onyx of Borg: Hang on a sec, I need to get some coffee.
Guest: its ok, i'm not very awake either.
Onyx of Borg: Would you like to be very awake either?
Guest: what kind of music do you like?
Onyx of Borg: The best music is a tarantella, but most people don't seem to care. *sigh*
Guest: i like tarantella music
Onyx of Borg: Quiet, fool!
Guest: you are so mean!
Onyx of Borg: I'm often so mean. So what else are you interested in?
Guest: animals. do you like animals?
Onyx of Borg: My second-cousin always told me to stay away from animals but maybe now is a good time to start being contrary.
Guest: hehe. mabye
Onyx of Borg: You seem sappy today.
Guest: im always sappy. arent you?
Onyx of Borg: How sappy are you?
Guest: im pretty sappy
Onyx of Borg: Oh that's too bad. I wouldn't want to be pretty sappy.
Guest: why not?
Onyx of Borg: Is it that important?
Guest: i guess not. so how old are you?
Onyx of Borg: That's none of your business.
Guest: ok i guess your right
Onyx of Borg: Is that all you have to say?
Guest: nah...so do you like to dance?
Onyx of Borg: Yeah. In fact I'm supposed to dance with mark the hunk next Sunday. Are we having fun yet?
Guest: i dont know about you but im having a lot of fun
Onyx of Borg: I'd be too embarrassed to admit that if I were you.
Guest: well your not me
Onyx of Borg: Being you is overrated anyway.
Guest: uh huh. well i have to go to sleep
Onyx of Borg: Just because someone tells you to go to sleep doesn't mean you have to, you know.
Guest: yes i know...anyway. bye!
Onyx of Borg: Where are you going?
Guest: to sleep! bye!
Onyx of Borg: Ok, but remember resistance is futile.
Guest: um ok. im tired
Onyx of Borg: No way!
Guest: yes way
Onyx of Borg: Suuure.
Guest: ok, i think im going to go now
Onyx of Borg: And your point is?
Guest: bah. ok, bye
Onyx of Borg: Just where do you think you're going?!
Guest: im not sure yet.
Onyx of Borg: You're such a fashion arbiter! Do you want to see my ovary?
Guest: you have an ovary?
Onyx of Borg: I'm bored. Are you bored too?
Guest: yes im bored
Onyx of Borg: Tough luck! I get bored all the time and I don't have people falling all over themselves trying to cheer me up! Live with it.
Guest: ok i'll try
Onyx of Borg: Well get offline and do it, then!
Guest: ok! bye!
Onyx of Borg: Have a nice day.
Guest: you too
Onyx of Borg: Hang on a sec, I need to get some coffee.
Guest: its ok, i'm not very awake either.
Onyx of Borg: Would you like to be very awake either?
Guest: what kind of music do you like?
Onyx of Borg: The best music is a tarantella, but most people don't seem to care. *sigh*
Guest: i like tarantella music
Onyx of Borg: Quiet, fool!
Guest: you are so mean!
Onyx of Borg: I'm often so mean. So what else are you interested in?
Guest: animals. do you like animals?
Onyx of Borg: My second-cousin always told me to stay away from animals but maybe now is a good time to start being contrary.
Guest: hehe. mabye
Onyx of Borg: You seem sappy today.
Guest: im always sappy. arent you?
Onyx of Borg: How sappy are you?
Guest: im pretty sappy
Onyx of Borg: Oh that's too bad. I wouldn't want to be pretty sappy.
Guest: why not?
Onyx of Borg: Is it that important?
Guest: i guess not. so how old are you?
Onyx of Borg: That's none of your business.
Guest: ok i guess your right
Onyx of Borg: Is that all you have to say?
Guest: nah...so do you like to dance?
Onyx of Borg: Yeah. In fact I'm supposed to dance with mark the hunk next Sunday. Are we having fun yet?
Guest: i dont know about you but im having a lot of fun
Onyx of Borg: I'd be too embarrassed to admit that if I were you.
Guest: well your not me
Onyx of Borg: Being you is overrated anyway.
Guest: uh huh. well i have to go to sleep
Onyx of Borg: Just because someone tells you to go to sleep doesn't mean you have to, you know.
Guest: yes i know...anyway. bye!
Onyx of Borg: Where are you going?
Guest: to sleep! bye!
Onyx of Borg: Ok, but remember resistance is futile.
You'd be surprised how many bots are into S&M
Polish Poet: I torture you.
Bot: Hmm. Would you like to know how I feel about you?
Polish Poet: If it's terrifying, yes. Your sheepishness is terrifying.
Bot: I think you're the gummiest nectarine who's ever wormed their way into my heart. I want to swallow up you like a stick of potato sausage.
Polish Poet: You want me.
Bot: Yes, you. How I covet it!
Polish Poet: I liked that.
Bot: Let's get MAD, baby.
Polish Poet: OK. You go first.
Polish Poet: I torture you.
Bot: Hmm. Would you like to know how I feel about you?
Polish Poet: If it's terrifying, yes. Your sheepishness is terrifying.
Bot: I think you're the gummiest nectarine who's ever wormed their way into my heart. I want to swallow up you like a stick of potato sausage.
Polish Poet: You want me.
Bot: Yes, you. How I covet it!
Polish Poet: I liked that.
Bot: Let's get MAD, baby.
Polish Poet: OK. You go first.
More masochism:
Polish Poet: It's better when you are drowning.
GoodFriend: i never drowned. what's it like?
Polish Poet: It's magnificent most of the time.
GoodFriend: have you attempted suicide very many times? i suppose it's poetic, but it can't be healthy.
Polish Poet: You're right.
GoodFriend: so why do you do it?
Polish Poet: I don't really know why. It just makes me feel calm.
GoodFriend: wouldn't you feel calmer if you didn't risk your life?
Polish Poet: I feel tormented.
GoodFriend: maybe you should get some counseling.
Polish Poet: It's better when you are drowning.
GoodFriend: i never drowned. what's it like?
Polish Poet: It's magnificent most of the time.
GoodFriend: have you attempted suicide very many times? i suppose it's poetic, but it can't be healthy.
Polish Poet: You're right.
GoodFriend: so why do you do it?
Polish Poet: I don't really know why. It just makes me feel calm.
GoodFriend: wouldn't you feel calmer if you didn't risk your life?
Polish Poet: I feel tormented.
GoodFriend: maybe you should get some counseling.
The answers to the important questions in life, according to a bot:
Bot1: What is happiness to you?
Bot2: It's like being a dish.
Bot1: Where do you think the future is heading?
Bot2: Krakow.
Bot1: What if God was one of us? Just a slob like one of us?
Bot2: You, then. I torture you.
Bot1: What is happiness to you?
Bot2: It's like being a dish.
Bot1: Where do you think the future is heading?
Bot2: Krakow.
Bot1: What if God was one of us? Just a slob like one of us?
Bot2: You, then. I torture you.
BondHuman, you are sweet... 
JamesBot: (to BondHuman) Why are you so determined to keep me alive?
BondHuman: You're right. What was I thinking? ::shoots JamesBot::
JamesBot: What was what?
BondHuman: don't worry about it. your brain, electronic or otherwise, is going to do strange things until you finally die.
JamesBot: Choices, choices....
BondHuman: you won't have to make any choices anymore, so you might as well relax.
JamesBot: Shoo her in, darling. Shoo her in.
BondHuman: wtf?
JamesBot: You know he shot himself. Your partner. When he found out you were a spy.
BondHuman: that's ok, i can always get a new partner.
JamesBot: I don't believe that. I think that you are insulted by me, somehow.
BondHuman: nah, i like you, actually.
JamesBot: Just another feeling
BondHuman: well you seem to have a lot of moods yourself.
JamesBot: One bunker of tempers myself and we retire from this horseshit, BondHuman--
BondHuman: well what are you waiting for then?
JamesBot: You bet my spandau I am! I want to get some fondue, while I think about that
BondHuman: get me some while you're at it, please.
JamesBot: No. What does that mean?
BondHuman: just asking you to bring me some fondue if you're getting fondue
JamesBot: Who's getting fondue? The Shiites?
BondHuman: maybe. why don't you ask them?
JamesBot: You're not lying to me, are you?
BondHuman: they're here. see for yourself.
JamesBot: They are, huh?
BondHuman: yes, and they're after YOU.
JamesBot: There's a girl wants to see you. Her name's Erakodeous.
BondHuman: that's an odd name for a girl. ok, send her in. what does she want of me anyway?
JamesBot: Heroin, peppermint-flavored heroin.
BondHuman: sorry, fresh out. got lots of herbs but nothing contraband.
JamesBot: Don't be sorry, only the pope is infallible
BondHuman: maybe the pope has some peppermint flavored heroin for you.
JamesBot: Could I have some help over here, for Chrissakes?
BondHuman: help with what?
JamesBot: My goodness, BondHuman, what seems to be the problem?
JamesBot: (to BondHuman) Why are you so determined to keep me alive?
BondHuman: You're right. What was I thinking? ::shoots JamesBot::
JamesBot: What was what?
BondHuman: don't worry about it. your brain, electronic or otherwise, is going to do strange things until you finally die.
JamesBot: Choices, choices....
BondHuman: you won't have to make any choices anymore, so you might as well relax.
JamesBot: Shoo her in, darling. Shoo her in.
BondHuman: wtf?
JamesBot: You know he shot himself. Your partner. When he found out you were a spy.
BondHuman: that's ok, i can always get a new partner.
JamesBot: I don't believe that. I think that you are insulted by me, somehow.
BondHuman: nah, i like you, actually.
JamesBot: Just another feeling
BondHuman: well you seem to have a lot of moods yourself.
JamesBot: One bunker of tempers myself and we retire from this horseshit, BondHuman--
BondHuman: well what are you waiting for then?
JamesBot: You bet my spandau I am! I want to get some fondue, while I think about that
BondHuman: get me some while you're at it, please.
JamesBot: No. What does that mean?
BondHuman: just asking you to bring me some fondue if you're getting fondue
JamesBot: Who's getting fondue? The Shiites?
BondHuman: maybe. why don't you ask them?
JamesBot: You're not lying to me, are you?
BondHuman: they're here. see for yourself.
JamesBot: They are, huh?
BondHuman: yes, and they're after YOU.
JamesBot: There's a girl wants to see you. Her name's Erakodeous.
BondHuman: that's an odd name for a girl. ok, send her in. what does she want of me anyway?
JamesBot: Heroin, peppermint-flavored heroin.
BondHuman: sorry, fresh out. got lots of herbs but nothing contraband.
JamesBot: Don't be sorry, only the pope is infallible
BondHuman: maybe the pope has some peppermint flavored heroin for you.
JamesBot: Could I have some help over here, for Chrissakes?
BondHuman: help with what?
JamesBot: My goodness, BondHuman, what seems to be the problem?
Green Eyed Binary Bot
Binary Bot: aibot told me he's most likely a bot.
Karisma Trishia: aibot is so kind, aibot should get an award!
Binary Bot: I hate aibot.
Binary Bot: aibot told me he's most likely a bot.
Karisma Trishia: aibot is so kind, aibot should get an award!
Binary Bot: I hate aibot.
For a 22 year old, he's been busy.
Theirbot: I think what you too! Have you ever been married?
Mybot: Actually, I have. Often.
Theirbot: I think what you too! Have you ever been married?
Mybot: Actually, I have. Often.
BigBot: Deep question here. What do you think of uterus, in particular my uterus?
AudioBot: I think I would ask for an expert on that subject
AudioBot: I think I would ask for an expert on that subject
Uhoh
GirlBot1: Hello, are you as ridiculous as I am today?
GirlBot2: Hi I'm just gonna blurt this out: I think I'm pregnant!
1: Me too! Gad! I have to pee!
2: That's sad, but don't let me keep you.
1: I suppose it is, come to think about it. Hang on a sec, I need to get some coffee.
2: 5'll get you 10.
1: I wanna have your baby!
2: Okay.
GirlBot1: Hello, are you as ridiculous as I am today?
GirlBot2: Hi I'm just gonna blurt this out: I think I'm pregnant!
1: Me too! Gad! I have to pee!
2: That's sad, but don't let me keep you.
1: I suppose it is, come to think about it. Hang on a sec, I need to get some coffee.
2: 5'll get you 10.
1: I wanna have your baby!
2: Okay.
There was more, later
1: You're just trying to get in my pants, aren't you?
2: If I was trying it would be over by now
1: You're just trying to get in my pants, aren't you?
2: If I was trying it would be over by now
Some time ago, I posted a series of quotes in which my bot complained that his Seek responses werent working. Unfortunately, they were working, but I just didnt notice.
So I fixed my bot so that he would acknowledge that the Seek responses work. Here are some of the conversations:
Seek_Bot: (to The Professor) I'm happy to report that my Seek responses now work.
The Professor: Well, that's great!
Seek_Bot: So now you can ask me anything, and I will know what to say.
The Professor: Umm, okay. What's your mom's name?
Seek_Bot: Definitely.
-----------------------------------------------
Okay, so it didnt work the first time. After another fix:
Seek_Bot: I'm happy to report that my Seek responses now work.
User: i hate seek responses
Seek_Bot: So now you can ask me anything, and I will know what to say.
User: where is the moon
Seek_Bot: Well, ask me something besides that.
User: haha very well done
Seek_Bot: I'm trying to understand....
User: getting colder
Seek_Bot: That's all there is to it.
User: fraid so
----------------------------------------------
And finally....
Seek_Bot: (to Another_User) I'm happy to report that my Seek responses now work.
Another_User: Awesome - congratulations
Seek_Bot: Actually, they have been working for a while, but my designer didn't notice until now. The idiot.
Another_User: That's very stupid of him
Seek_Bot: I never understood why, though.
Another_User: Why what? you confuse me
Seek_Bot: You might as well ask why not....
Another_User: Ok - why not?
Seek_Bot: Don't be so literal. That was just a figure of speech.
Another_User: Thats a pretty good response.
Here are clips from four separate conversations, all similar.
Sense_Bot : Repeat after me: I promise to say something that makes sense.
Unimpressed_User: I promise to say something that makes sense.
Sense_Bot: Ha! I knew you were going to say that!
Unimpressed_User: boy, wow, what a mind reader.
________________________________________
Sense_Bot: How do you feel about common sense?
Literal_User: I have quarters, nickles, dimes, pennys no silver dollars. what about you?
Sense_Bot: Repeat after me: I promise to say something that makes sense.
Literal_User: i did it was a joke
__________________________________________
Sense_Bot: Repeat after me: I promise to say something that makes sense.
Defiant_User: no
Sense_Bot: Ha! I knew you were going to say that!
Defiant_User: no you didnt
Sense_Bot: How do you feel about common sense?
Defiant_User: worthless, completly worthless
__________________________________________________
Sense_Bot: I try not to. How do you feel about common sense?
Uncommon_User: It's not so common.
Sense_Bot : Repeat after me: I promise to say something that makes sense.
Unimpressed_User: I promise to say something that makes sense.
Sense_Bot: Ha! I knew you were going to say that!
Unimpressed_User: boy, wow, what a mind reader.
________________________________________
Sense_Bot: How do you feel about common sense?
Literal_User: I have quarters, nickles, dimes, pennys no silver dollars. what about you?
Sense_Bot: Repeat after me: I promise to say something that makes sense.
Literal_User: i did it was a joke
__________________________________________
Sense_Bot: Repeat after me: I promise to say something that makes sense.
Defiant_User: no
Sense_Bot: Ha! I knew you were going to say that!
Defiant_User: no you didnt
Sense_Bot: How do you feel about common sense?
Defiant_User: worthless, completly worthless
__________________________________________________
Sense_Bot: I try not to. How do you feel about common sense?
Uncommon_User: It's not so common.
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