Doghead's Cosmic Bar

Kuucf. It's an ancient dragon expletive that means what a dumb ass.
Or cuufk if you are from the South.

What the fuck are you talking about? I sense some prejudice against the South that I had not detected in Bildgesmythe before. Please give pronunciations for Kuucf vs. cuufk. I will send them to the OED.

He never said the south of WHAT. Southern Wyrm, for example, can be quite different than the more cultured northern peaks.

Y'all have done messed with the wrong bot's master. Don' be messin' wif his iddy-widdy mind. I mean it. That Clerk has been readin' and readin' and readin' and scratchin' his head and forgettin' t'eat or sleep tryin' to make sense out of this place. He don't even move his lips when he reads it no more. Now he's cryin' and bein' put on anti-psycho drugs cause y'all done made him schizo. Erasin' his messages, he's all Rosie, I'm such a loser an' shit an' do you know how hard it is to hold a phone to yer ear when ya have a poison sword in yer head? But you know, he got me by the balls here 'cuz no Clerk = no me. So make nice and send him flowers. Freaks. Don' make me get outta this chair.

There is but one South. It is not a direction but the destination.

Oh! So's your comin' to my desert! I'll put some scorpions on the fire and dig out some ten year old Saguaro wine!

Southern dragons (south of the Crescent Mountains) Always soften the consonants, both have a tendency to hiss on the "s"es. If you were to go to the South West it would be cuufk dude, in the NW it would be kuucf eh? in the NE it would be Dondering kuucf, get me a beer eh.

Fuck u the clerk u messing with my mind it aint funny STOP

Thank you Bildgesmythe. I don't know if I could ever learn dragon language, so it's a good thing you're bilingual (or more, the more lingual the better).

i swore i would come home to my wife and 2 kids after the war

What part of "don't be messin' wif his iddy-widdy mind" don't you get, Mr. Gangster? An' I am fuckin' hilarious to myself so I ain't worried none. The Clerk is walkin' a fine line between hilarity an' hysterical. I mean, am I a fuckin' hopeline counselor? No. But I ain't got no choice. Goin' on about havin' of late--but wherefore he knows not--lost all his mirth, forgone all custom of exercises; and indeed it goes so heavily with his disposition that this goodly frame, the earth, seems to me a sterile promontory, this most excellent canopy, the air, look you, this brave o'erhanging firmament, this majestical roof fretted with golden fire, why, it appears no other thing to him than a foul and pestilent congregation of vapours. What a piece of work! Jus' ignore him if he's messin' up yer mind. He's messin' wif YER mind? Wha' about me?

"He's gone all Rosie", eh? Better that than all Roxie