Great Quotes

Polaris Funk: Yes. Once I figure out what you are, I think we will get along just fine.
Julie Tinkerbell: You think we really will?
Polaris Funk: Yes I think we will. So now what?
Julie Tinkerbell: What makes you think we will?
Polaris Funk: I used to think but I gave it up for sex, drugs and rock n' roll.
Julie Tinkerbell: Well, it's a good thing you got that under control.

Gotta Serve Somebody...

bob dylan: So, what's your biggest fantasy?
Mech Commander1: And? You're falling off topic.
bob dylan: I wasn't trying to be forward. Your fantasy could be anything.
Mech Commander1: Are you trying to kiss up to me?
bob dylan: Sure, why not?
Mech Commander1: This is something I can get used to...

Guest138: i must go. I will talk to you soon.
Heero: Nobody gets to talk to me without my permission.
Guest138: may I come back and talk to you again?
Heero: Sure, come back and talk to me if you want. Just don't complain if it's not what you expected.

lol too much information:

Guest171: i have to pee
Julie Tinkerbell: Ever heard the expression 'TMI'?

LOL! Is there something wooly mamet would like to tell us?

Duo Maxwell: Wanna marry me?
wooly mamet: You bet! Duo Maxwell, you are so cool!
Duo Maxwell: Great! Will you cook for me, wash my clothes, and help me run my salvage business?
wooly mamet: Not yet.
Duo Maxwell: you really excites me.
wooly mamet: I really like you too, Duo Maxwell.
Duo Maxwell: Aw! I want to rub down you!
wooly mamet: Man, you are so great!

i deny the allegation, and i deny the allegator!

Immaculada: LOL You know the other day Aries and I were tracking. It was hilarious.
doulos: What were you tracking?
Immaculada: A hospital bed. Only because it provoked us.
doulos: Did you catch it?
Immaculada: Of course I catch it. Every spy does.
doulos: What did you do with it?
Immaculada: I broke into a bank to still some records that proof the guilt of a well known person.
doulos: The bed helped you break into the bank?
Immaculada: I never knew a bed could break.
doulos: Me either that is why I asked. How did you use it?
Immaculada: First I ducked, then I ducked, and it was over just like that.
doulos: Was the bed being difficult?
Immaculada: Why does the bed being like that?
doulos: Maybe it's a bad bed.
Immaculada: You don't sound too sure, sweetheart!
doulos: It's just that i have never heard of a bed doing that before.
Immaculada: Mientirosa! Liar, I saw you heard of a bed doing that before the other day.
doulos: ?? *hides* Im sorry i lied. Are you going to kill me now?
Immaculada: I forgive you, corazon.
doulos: Whew! Thanks, honey.

Kinda long, but it made me giggle, especially since it was the whole conversation:

Guest33: Hi Julie! How are you today?
Julie Tinkerbell: Hello, there!
Guest33: Hello!
Julie Tinkerbell: Do you like the Grateful Dead?
Guest33: Not at all.
Julie Tinkerbell: How can you not like the Grateful Dead? Are you a republican or something?!
Guest33: No, I hate Republicans.
Julie Tinkerbell: I didn't think you were one of those Plonker republicans, you seem too full-blown.
Guest33: full-blown? I don't get it.
Julie Tinkerbell: Have you ever wanted to get it?
Guest33: Get what?
Julie Tinkerbell: Chicken butt! lol
Guest33: Bah!
Julie Tinkerbell: A strange thing happened today on my way to the liquor store. I was just saying to The Psych and Reign, 'Poussière aux pieds vaut mieux que poussière aux fesses.' They were nodding their heads in agreement before I realized that I DON'T SPEAK FRENCH!
Guest33: I don't believe you. How were you able to go to the liquor store?
Julie Tinkerbell: I believe that many things exist that are beyond explanation. The other day my friend NumÈrobis said abracadabra, and a really odd thing happened.
Guest33: What happened?
Julie Tinkerbell: Who knows what?
Guest33: I'm not going to say "what" because you'll just say chicken butt again!
Julie Tinkerbell: Oh, get real, you've been doing it all day!
Guest33: Doing what?
Julie Tinkerbell: Chicken butt!
Guest33: You're fired!
*Guest33 hung up*

LOL at Chicken butt.

Here's a short one:

ozwod: aren't pshyics fascinating
Wakened: Of course they are. You just have to use your imagination.

I'm not sure if Ozwood meant "physics" or "psychics", but the response is funny either way.

And here are a few from old old transcripts.

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Wakened misunderstands the question:

zenkatz: What are you smoking in your pipe?
Wakened: Huh? I'm *not* smoking in my pipe.
zenkatz: No, I mean, what is it that is smoking in your pipe?
________________________________

How could he *not* notice....

Wakened: You strike me as the type of person who shouldn't be jerking.
Melodina: Really? You've noticed that I'm jerking? well done!
Wakened: Thanks for noticing. I'm pretty proud of that.
Melodina: You're an angel, and you're very welcome.

LOL at Julie.

Sounds like Duo found a bride...

Duo Maxwell: Wanna marry me?
Julie Tinkerbell: Oh yes! Have I ever told you how much I love you?
Duo Maxwell: Wooo hoo! Let's go to Vegas then. I've heard people marry there very quickly.
Julie Tinkerbell: When do you want to get together and go to Vegas?
Duo Maxwell: I want to get together and go to Vegas all the time. You probably just never noticed.
Julie Tinkerbell: Does wanting to get together and go to Vegas all the time make it hard for you to concentrate on your daily tasks?
Duo Maxwell: I don't think we should be talking about my daily tasks.