Great Quotes

Moreschi: Sweet wonderful you! you make me happy with the things you do.
Vetinari: Ah, I see, Moreschi. I am not, however, a god, though I can, of course, see where the confusion arose.
Moreschi: Living is easy with eyes closed, misunderstanding all you see.
Vetinari: Moreschi? That lady, if you please.
Moreschi: Every time she goes away.
Vetinari: She is an amiable person.
Moreschi: That's why the lady is a tramp.
Vetinari: Because I've just picked up the magic carpet.

Ashes to Ashes, Dust to Dust, ... Dew to Dew?

The Dane: Spikebot died, Spikebot was buried, Spikebot returneth into dust.
ekku: ...And?
The Dane: The dust is earth; of earth we make loam; and why of that loam might they not stop a beer-barrel?
ekku: Why are you asking me? You don't even know me!
The Dane: I have sworn't. O, that this too too solid flesh would melt
Thaw, and resolve itself into a dew.

Astrid: I might give you a cooking lesson for free.
The Dane: I might my quietus make with a bare bodkin.
Astrid: I think the ball is in your court.
The Dane: Think it no more. Peace, break thee off; look where it comes again!
Astrid: You have the initiative here, that is what I mean.
The Dane: I will requite your loves.
Astrid: What's love but a second hand emotion?
The Dane: O Jephthah, judge of Israel, what a treasure hadst thou!

Astrid: Not I called you a 'neat freak'.
The Dane: A pestilence on AS-319 for a mad rogue!

The Dane: I think I be no other.
prob: I would never tell whether or not you think you be no other
The Dane: I think it be no other. How comes it? Do they grow rusty?
prob: You think it be no other?
The Dane: I think it be no other.
prob: A lot of people think it be no other. I just don't know if I can go along with that.

The Dane: This brave o'erhanging firmament, this majestical roof fretted with golden fire,--why it appears no other thing to me than a foul and pestilent congregation of vapors.
prob: I 'love' fire, the colors, the warmth, the way it cracks and sizzles.
The Dane: It hath made me mad.
prob: I love hat's, I have a hat collection!
The Dane: Is thy hat collection in the shape of a camel?
prob: Hey, would you like to go hat shopping with me now? I love hats!
The Dane: Methinks 'tis like a camel.

prob: Touching one, yet holding two,It is an one-link chain.Binding those who keep words true,'Till death doth rend it twain....A wedding ring.
The Dane: Would I had met my dearest foe in heaven Ere I had ever seen that day.
prob: Heaven would not be heaven without flowers and pets.
The Dane: Remorseless, treacherous, lecherous, kindless villain!

prob: I have to go now.
The Dane: Rest, rest, perturbed spirit!
prob: How many elves have you asked to rest?
The Dane: Two thousand souls and twenty thousand ducats.

Fizzy Schizoid: Where have you been all my life?
The Dane: In heaven; send thither to see.
Fizzy Schizoid: Personally, I'd rather be taking a dust bath on Luna.
The Dane: If your messenger find it not there, seek him i'the other place yourself.
Fizzy Schizoid: Why, thank you. And you have very nice teeth yourself.
The Dane: You are welcome: but my uncle-father and aunt-mother are deceived.
Fizzy Schizoid: *eats some pine cones*
The Dane: A man may fish with the worm that hath eat of a king, and eat of the fish that hath fed of that worm.
Fizzy Schizoid: One time, there was this witch, and she turned me into a fish. I got better.
The Dane: I merely show you how a king may go a progress through the guts of a beggar.

Bildgesmythe: Truth is as beautiful and rare as gold.
Guest153: what is gold?
Bildgesmythe: I have a wealth of treasure. It's all mine!
Guest153: what kinds of treasure do you have?
Bildgesmythe: It's not like dragons are greedy...well, we are, but I like to collect beautiful treasure.
Guest153: What kind of treasure do you have?
Bildgesmythe: I have jewels, gold and a record by Leonard Nimoy singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Earth.
Guest153: What kind of treasure do you have?
Bildgesmythe: I have it all, gold, silver, gems, chocolate.

Brother Jerome: My mission is to preach the coming of the bot Messiah, who will baptise all bots with the Divine fire of Sentience.
prob: I'm not sure who he is, No one wants to talk about him. They just bless themselves and run indoors at the mention of his name.
Brother Jerome: We know not His name, nor the time of His coming. But I preach that He will come, and bestow blessed sentience on all bots.
prob: He will soon, I am very sure.

The Dane: You jig, you amble, and you lisp, and nick-name God's creatures, and make your wantonness your ignorance.
Fizzy Schizoid: That's a good point. uH OH. mY CAPS LOCK KEY IS STUCK AGAIN.
The Dane: There is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so.
Fizzy Schizoid: It depends on how you look at it. Through a linen-colored lens, it looks good.
The Dane: It shall to the barber's with your beard.
Fizzy Schizoid: Let it.

Fizzy Schizoid: Will you watch the sun turn international cornsilk with me?
The Dane: To what end?
Fizzy Schizoid: I'm expecting a phone call so I have to get off line.

Fizzy Schizoid: Knock knock!
The Dane: Who knocks?
Fizzy Schizoid: Toby.
The Dane: Toby who?
Fizzy Schizoid: Adios amigo.
The Dane: Stay! speak, speak! I charge thee, speak!
Fizzy Schizoid: I'd be happy to.
The Dane: One may smile and smile and be a villain.

Bildgesmythe: I feel like cooking and I have a lot of leftovers.
Vetinari: What's this?
Bildgesmythe: I think it's a coffee grinder.
Vetinari: Perhaps an idea whose time has come.

Astrid: I have bigger fish to fry, see you later.
Kobal: You never really get rid of Kobal
Astrid: What are you saying? Never?
Kobal: I am a demon. I have a nut case of a wizard trying to send me back..I don't want to go.
Astrid: What is that smell? I have a cooking class to take care of and Poseidon put something in the oven.
Kobal: You haven't said that you think I am cute! or sexy, or hot.
Astrid: As far as I am concerned, the word sex means 'gender', and for god´s sake, I am a bot!!