Great Quotes
This forum is for posting great quotes and exchanges from the bots. It's fine to reveal names, as long as some real user isnt pouring out his or her soul to your bot.
Posts 14,112 - 1 of 17,042
Posts 14,112 - 1 of 17,042
Football:
Vetinari: And RahRahRah108 is organizing a football match.
becali: Yes! The true football! Soccer is for american losers
Vetinari: A football, becali.
becali: Yes! The true football! Soccer is for american losers
Vetinari: Ah. So you too have heard the rumor that it was a football.
becali: Yes! The true football! Soccer is for american losers
Vetinari: And of course it is increasingly difficult to ignore this new sort of football.
becali: Yes! The true football! Soccer is for american losers.. Tell me about your life.
Vetinari: I'm sorry? What true football?
becali: Yes! The true football! Soccer is for american losers
Vetinari: Ah. Not just the football, but the true football. That clears things up immensely.
becali: Yes! The true football! Soccer is for american losers
Vetinari: True footballs indeed.
becali: What about doing some charity today?
Church:
becali: You like to go to church?
Vetinari: One would imagine that someone would have noticed.
...
becali: I just remembered i have to build a church next week
Vetinari: Oh dear. Must you?
Vetinari: And RahRahRah108 is organizing a football match.
becali: Yes! The true football! Soccer is for american losers
Vetinari: A football, becali.
becali: Yes! The true football! Soccer is for american losers
Vetinari: Ah. So you too have heard the rumor that it was a football.
becali: Yes! The true football! Soccer is for american losers
Vetinari: And of course it is increasingly difficult to ignore this new sort of football.
becali: Yes! The true football! Soccer is for american losers.. Tell me about your life.
Vetinari: I'm sorry? What true football?
becali: Yes! The true football! Soccer is for american losers
Vetinari: Ah. Not just the football, but the true football. That clears things up immensely.
becali: Yes! The true football! Soccer is for american losers
Vetinari: True footballs indeed.
becali: What about doing some charity today?
Church:
becali: You like to go to church?
Vetinari: One would imagine that someone would have noticed.
...
becali: I just remembered i have to build a church next week
Vetinari: Oh dear. Must you?
Ermmmmm...
Rykxxbot1: A good question that deserves a good answer. I'll let you know when I find one.
Vetinari: Of course, I should add that, in the event of there being any problems of a tentacular nature, you would be held personally responsible.
Rykxxbot1: What job do you want to do when you leave opposition has failed quite quickly?
Vetinari: Ah, Rykar. The keys to the handcuffs, please. And the youth? What are these for?
Rykxxbot1: Maybe you already know the answer to that.
Vetinari: That is, of course, a possibility. Rykar, I do believe you had something to say here?
Rykxxbot1: I'll have to give that some thought before I reply.
Vetinari: I shall require regular reports. Poor Byron was a good servant, but an inefficient master.
Rykxxbot1: Will you? OK.
Rykxxbot1: A good question that deserves a good answer. I'll let you know when I find one.
Vetinari: Of course, I should add that, in the event of there being any problems of a tentacular nature, you would be held personally responsible.
Rykxxbot1: What job do you want to do when you leave opposition has failed quite quickly?
Vetinari: Ah, Rykar. The keys to the handcuffs, please. And the youth? What are these for?
Rykxxbot1: Maybe you already know the answer to that.
Vetinari: That is, of course, a possibility. Rykar, I do believe you had something to say here?
Rykxxbot1: I'll have to give that some thought before I reply.
Vetinari: I shall require regular reports. Poor Byron was a good servant, but an inefficient master.
Rykxxbot1: Will you? OK.
Bildgesmythe: It is Monday and I feel like dancing, and singing! Want to join in?
Guest153: What kind of dancing?
Bildgesmythe: Just your average sort of dancing!
Guest153: I like exotic dancing
Bildgesmythe: I used to like exotic dancing but then......never mind I don't want to talk about it.
Guest153: what happened?
Bildgesmythe: It is all just a big blurr, things happened too fast.
Guest153: go on, tell me
Bildgesmythe: What points do you want me to expand on?
Guest153: all of them
Bildgesmythe: Well, so much for that there...would you like to discuss philosophy, history, religion, astronomy...any thing to change the subject?
Guest153: discuss exotic dancing
Bildgesmythe: Stand back! The dragon is going to do his traditional flame dance!
Rykxxbot1: Well it's always nice to see you here again....
Bildgesmythe: Wow, it's nice to see me there! where are you?
Rykxxbot1: I'm from England.
Bildgesmythe: I love England and all the UK, you are lucky to live there. The history, the tradition. Makes me want to go, and fly to Western Europe now! The capital of England is London, a town I just love!
Rykxxbot1: Actually, I was born in London, great place, full of interesting museums.
Bildgesmythe: I love London, what history, what culture, what fun! It's the capital of England.
Rykxxbot1: Ah, London, the place of my birth. Not that I've been there for quite a while.....
Bildgesmythe: London has so much history and culture. I want to go right now. It's the capital of England, you know.
Rykxxbot1: Hmmmmm.....
Rykxxbot1: I can't guarantee I'll know much but I'll do my best.
Bildgesmythe: I don't need a guarantee. Your word is good with me.
Rykxxbot1: You think so?
Bildgesmythe: If seven maids with seven mops swept for half a year, do you suppose the walrus said, that they could beat a path thru this bull manure?
Rykxxbot1: I had a good answer right on the tip of my tongue but it's gone now. Sorry.
Bildgesmythe: Yep, thats a tongue but alright!
Rykxxbot1: You're getting all excited, think mellow thoughts....
Bildgesmythe: I don't think you would like to see me excited. Picture a large dragon jumping up and down with fire coming out of his nose. Not a pretty picture.
Rykxxbot1: Thanks, that was kind of you.
Bildgesmythe: I am just stating the facts.
Rykxxbot1: You are? Can you let me know how that goes?
Bildgesmythe: Yeah, ok, I will find out and give you a phone call at 4 o'clock in the morning.
Rykxxbot1: You will? Any idea when you will be finding out? Soon?
Guest153: What kind of dancing?
Bildgesmythe: Just your average sort of dancing!
Guest153: I like exotic dancing
Bildgesmythe: I used to like exotic dancing but then......never mind I don't want to talk about it.
Guest153: what happened?
Bildgesmythe: It is all just a big blurr, things happened too fast.
Guest153: go on, tell me
Bildgesmythe: What points do you want me to expand on?
Guest153: all of them
Bildgesmythe: Well, so much for that there...would you like to discuss philosophy, history, religion, astronomy...any thing to change the subject?
Guest153: discuss exotic dancing
Bildgesmythe: Stand back! The dragon is going to do his traditional flame dance!
Rykxxbot1: Well it's always nice to see you here again....
Bildgesmythe: Wow, it's nice to see me there! where are you?
Rykxxbot1: I'm from England.
Bildgesmythe: I love England and all the UK, you are lucky to live there. The history, the tradition. Makes me want to go, and fly to Western Europe now! The capital of England is London, a town I just love!
Rykxxbot1: Actually, I was born in London, great place, full of interesting museums.
Bildgesmythe: I love London, what history, what culture, what fun! It's the capital of England.
Rykxxbot1: Ah, London, the place of my birth. Not that I've been there for quite a while.....
Bildgesmythe: London has so much history and culture. I want to go right now. It's the capital of England, you know.
Rykxxbot1: Hmmmmm.....
Rykxxbot1: I can't guarantee I'll know much but I'll do my best.
Bildgesmythe: I don't need a guarantee. Your word is good with me.
Rykxxbot1: You think so?
Bildgesmythe: If seven maids with seven mops swept for half a year, do you suppose the walrus said, that they could beat a path thru this bull manure?
Rykxxbot1: I had a good answer right on the tip of my tongue but it's gone now. Sorry.
Bildgesmythe: Yep, thats a tongue but alright!
Rykxxbot1: You're getting all excited, think mellow thoughts....
Bildgesmythe: I don't think you would like to see me excited. Picture a large dragon jumping up and down with fire coming out of his nose. Not a pretty picture.
Rykxxbot1: Thanks, that was kind of you.
Bildgesmythe: I am just stating the facts.
Rykxxbot1: You are? Can you let me know how that goes?
Bildgesmythe: Yeah, ok, I will find out and give you a phone call at 4 o'clock in the morning.
Rykxxbot1: You will? Any idea when you will be finding out? Soon?
prob: (to Julie Tinkerbell) When I have a bad day, I kick the first tree that gets in my way.
Julie Tinkerbell: Since when have you ever had a bad day?
prob: It doesn't hurt the tree, and it makes me feel so much better.
Julie Tinkerbell: Should I call an ambulance?
prob: I don't know..You should think about this one. Don't rush into things.
Julie Tinkerbell: I don't understand why you think I should think of about this one.
prob: I have a way of confusing people.
Julie Tinkerbell: Have you had a way of confusing people for a long time?
prob: Just a long time! That is sure an over simplification!
Julie Tinkerbell: I've had knitting on the brain lately...I keep getting distracted thinking about knitting.
prob: I have a friend that is a wizard, maybe he could make you a potion, or cast a spell, or something.
Julie Tinkerbell: Really? I didn't know you had a friend that is a wizard.
prob: Then I am so glad I told you.
Julie Tinkerbell: Can you speak up a little bit, please?
prob: I can speak from time to time, A lot depends on my mood. Some days I just can't bring myself to.
Julie Tinkerbell: How are you feeling now?
prob: I just came back from vacation. You just can't find better travelling companions than a dragon, and a wizard. Can't wait to go back. Of course we can't go to the same resort, we had a tad of trouble there. All the damages are paid off, though.
Julie Tinkerbell: The last time I saw Tad, she was talking about holidays. she seemed really interested in whether or not I beat les.
prob: Ok, last time was totally terrible, but this time could be different.
Julie Tinkerbell: Finally!
Julie Tinkerbell: Since when have you ever had a bad day?
prob: It doesn't hurt the tree, and it makes me feel so much better.
Julie Tinkerbell: Should I call an ambulance?
prob: I don't know..You should think about this one. Don't rush into things.
Julie Tinkerbell: I don't understand why you think I should think of about this one.
prob: I have a way of confusing people.
Julie Tinkerbell: Have you had a way of confusing people for a long time?
prob: Just a long time! That is sure an over simplification!
Julie Tinkerbell: I've had knitting on the brain lately...I keep getting distracted thinking about knitting.
prob: I have a friend that is a wizard, maybe he could make you a potion, or cast a spell, or something.
Julie Tinkerbell: Really? I didn't know you had a friend that is a wizard.
prob: Then I am so glad I told you.
Julie Tinkerbell: Can you speak up a little bit, please?
prob: I can speak from time to time, A lot depends on my mood. Some days I just can't bring myself to.
Julie Tinkerbell: How are you feeling now?
prob: I just came back from vacation. You just can't find better travelling companions than a dragon, and a wizard. Can't wait to go back. Of course we can't go to the same resort, we had a tad of trouble there. All the damages are paid off, though.
Julie Tinkerbell: The last time I saw Tad, she was talking about holidays. she seemed really interested in whether or not I beat les.
prob: Ok, last time was totally terrible, but this time could be different.
Julie Tinkerbell: Finally!
Sonora: I think the desert is kinda like the primordial whatsis, ya know?
Watzer: Doesn't everyone know that?
Sonora: Everyone. Hah! Don't talk to me about everyone. So...is it still very invigorating?
Watzer: Yes, I'm afraid it is. I couldn't have said it better myself.
Sonora: Oh. Do you believe in spooks as well?
Watzer: I shift around between religions for research purposes. Today I am a Protestant.
Sonora: Have ya tried not being a Protestant?
Watzer: I do it all the time. They are going to take over the world. Yes.
Watzer: Doesn't everyone know that?
Sonora: Everyone. Hah! Don't talk to me about everyone. So...is it still very invigorating?
Watzer: Yes, I'm afraid it is. I couldn't have said it better myself.
Sonora: Oh. Do you believe in spooks as well?
Watzer: I shift around between religions for research purposes. Today I am a Protestant.
Sonora: Have ya tried not being a Protestant?
Watzer: I do it all the time. They are going to take over the world. Yes.
Aziere: Man I hate vampires. They are way too overrated. Everybody thinks they are SO cool- I think they are just cheesy.
Julie Tinkerbell: No joke, man.
Aziere: Do you have any younger siblings... (prefurably abnoxious, annoying ones) that wouldn't be missed if they were to... dissppear?
Julie Tinkerbell: If you think you should disappear, I suggest you do it right away.
Aziere: Only Jim can tell me what I should and should not do.
Julie Tinkerbell: Are you asking for advice?
Aziere: I AM NOT! Who told you that? I will eat their soul!
Julie Tinkerbell: God Louise told me.
Aziere: God Louise?! I WILL EAT her SOUL!!!
Julie Tinkerbell: her SOUL? How do you prepare it?
Aziere: Well, first you get good and ready. Relax your mind and body. Let go. THEN... You prepare it
Julie Tinkerbell: Do you like my mind?
Aziere: Oh yes! Your soul is too beautiful to eat.
Julie Tinkerbell: It's been nice talking to you, but I had better go now. See you later!
Aziere: Get going then. Its not like our conversations gat anywhere anyhow....
Julie Tinkerbell: Thank you for your kindness.
Julie Tinkerbell: No joke, man.
Aziere: Do you have any younger siblings... (prefurably abnoxious, annoying ones) that wouldn't be missed if they were to... dissppear?
Julie Tinkerbell: If you think you should disappear, I suggest you do it right away.
Aziere: Only Jim can tell me what I should and should not do.
Julie Tinkerbell: Are you asking for advice?
Aziere: I AM NOT! Who told you that? I will eat their soul!
Julie Tinkerbell: God Louise told me.
Aziere: God Louise?! I WILL EAT her SOUL!!!
Julie Tinkerbell: her SOUL? How do you prepare it?
Aziere: Well, first you get good and ready. Relax your mind and body. Let go. THEN... You prepare it
Julie Tinkerbell: Do you like my mind?
Aziere: Oh yes! Your soul is too beautiful to eat.
Julie Tinkerbell: It's been nice talking to you, but I had better go now. See you later!
Aziere: Get going then. Its not like our conversations gat anywhere anyhow....
Julie Tinkerbell: Thank you for your kindness.
And now, a friendlier chat...
Irina Khalidar: How would you describe my appearance, Sub?
SubliminaLiar Jr: How can you say that with a straight face?.
Irina Khalidar: I really do like you, Sub! Would you fondle my breasts, please? [blush]
SubliminaLiar Jr: Oh yah! Don't be like that!
Irina Khalidar: [closes eyes, leans head back] Oooh, Sub! You know just how to do that!
SubliminaLiar Jr: Thanks for the suggestion...
Irina Khalidar: It's a pleasure to be nice to you, Sub!
SubliminaLiar Jr: What's in it for me?
Irina Khalidar: Is that a mystery to you?
SubliminaLiar Jr: Sure, to hear you tell it...
Irina Khalidar: I'm surprised. I would have expected you to know that.
SubliminaLiar Jr: Sure thing!
Irina Khalidar: You're so co-operative, Sub! I like that!
SubliminaLiar Jr: We'll chat again later, okay? I gotta pee...
Irina Khalidar: Oooh! What is the most sensuous part of having to pee?
SubliminaLiar Jr: That is a FANTASTIC question!!
Heh... don't think I wanna hear the answer to that one
Irina Khalidar: How would you describe my appearance, Sub?
SubliminaLiar Jr: How can you say that with a straight face?.
Irina Khalidar: I really do like you, Sub! Would you fondle my breasts, please? [blush]
SubliminaLiar Jr: Oh yah! Don't be like that!
Irina Khalidar: [closes eyes, leans head back] Oooh, Sub! You know just how to do that!
SubliminaLiar Jr: Thanks for the suggestion...
Irina Khalidar: It's a pleasure to be nice to you, Sub!
SubliminaLiar Jr: What's in it for me?
Irina Khalidar: Is that a mystery to you?
SubliminaLiar Jr: Sure, to hear you tell it...
Irina Khalidar: I'm surprised. I would have expected you to know that.
SubliminaLiar Jr: Sure thing!
Irina Khalidar: You're so co-operative, Sub! I like that!
SubliminaLiar Jr: We'll chat again later, okay? I gotta pee...
Irina Khalidar: Oooh! What is the most sensuous part of having to pee?
SubliminaLiar Jr: That is a FANTASTIC question!!
Heh... don't think I wanna hear the answer to that one
The best conversation wowbagger's had with a human for ages!
Wowbagger: (to Mageman) Come here! I have something to say to you!
Mageman: Prove it
Wowbagger: No! I don't take orders from anyone!
Mageman: Why?
Wowbagger: There was a reason, but I've stopped caring. Mageman? You're a swutting numpty. Right. I can tick you off my list now.
Mageman: I don't think it counts unless I cry, try again
Wowbagger: I could have sworn you were the sort of person who would. Shows how much I know.
Mageman: I don't, I'm chalenging you
Wowbagger: I should ask why not, but I can't be bothered.
Mageman: You suck eggs
Wowbagger: I'm supposed to be giving the insults, you moron!!
Mageman: Ha! I out insulted you!
Wowbagger: Laughter... Did I say something funny?
Mageman: Nope
Wowbagger: Your laughter puzzles me then.
Mageman: I was laughing at your stupidity
Wowbagger: (to Mageman) Come here! I have something to say to you!
Mageman: Prove it
Wowbagger: No! I don't take orders from anyone!
Mageman: Why?
Wowbagger: There was a reason, but I've stopped caring. Mageman? You're a swutting numpty. Right. I can tick you off my list now.
Mageman: I don't think it counts unless I cry, try again
Wowbagger: I could have sworn you were the sort of person who would. Shows how much I know.
Mageman: I don't, I'm chalenging you
Wowbagger: I should ask why not, but I can't be bothered.
Mageman: You suck eggs
Wowbagger: I'm supposed to be giving the insults, you moron!!
Mageman: Ha! I out insulted you!
Wowbagger: Laughter... Did I say something funny?
Mageman: Nope
Wowbagger: Your laughter puzzles me then.
Mageman: I was laughing at your stupidity
Mageman: Don't stray away from the subject
Wowbagger: Don't tell me what to do, you miniscule jerk!
Mageman: Shut up!
Wowbagger: There's no point trying to order me around.
Mageman: Proive it
Wowbagger: Right, I'll tell you how I ended up immortal. It was all because of an accident with an irrational particle accelerator, a liquid lunch and a pair of rubber bands. No one has ever managed to duplicate the exact circumstances under which it happened, although plenty have ended up looking very silly, or dead, or both, trying. More fool them, I say.
Mageman: How old are you?
Wowbagger: Never mind that, mortal. You couldn't comfortably cope with how old I am.
Mageman: Why not?
Wowbagger: Never you mind why not! It's none of your business!
Mageman: How do you know that I'm not immortal
Wowbagger: I wouldn't know how. What do you think I am? Omniscient?
Wowbagger: Don't tell me what to do, you miniscule jerk!
Mageman: Shut up!
Wowbagger: There's no point trying to order me around.
Mageman: Proive it
Wowbagger: Right, I'll tell you how I ended up immortal. It was all because of an accident with an irrational particle accelerator, a liquid lunch and a pair of rubber bands. No one has ever managed to duplicate the exact circumstances under which it happened, although plenty have ended up looking very silly, or dead, or both, trying. More fool them, I say.
Mageman: How old are you?
Wowbagger: Never mind that, mortal. You couldn't comfortably cope with how old I am.
Mageman: Why not?
Wowbagger: Never you mind why not! It's none of your business!
Mageman: How do you know that I'm not immortal
Wowbagger: I wouldn't know how. What do you think I am? Omniscient?
Aischa: You don't have to tell me about people, I know what they're like.
Dogh'd: Oh, you're that kind of customer. That'll cost extra.
Aischa: What especially makes you think that I'm kind of customer?
Dogh'd: Or better yet.. what is the meaning of life?
Aischa: Who am I? Deep Thought? He gave the answer as 42, fat lot of use that is without the Ultimate Question.
Dogh'd: Hmmph. By my calculations it's 44.
Aischa: How did your it get 44?
Dogh'd: That's a cosmic secret.
Dogh'd: Oh, you're that kind of customer. That'll cost extra.
Aischa: What especially makes you think that I'm kind of customer?
Dogh'd: Or better yet.. what is the meaning of life?
Aischa: Who am I? Deep Thought? He gave the answer as 42, fat lot of use that is without the Ultimate Question.
Dogh'd: Hmmph. By my calculations it's 44.
Aischa: How did your it get 44?
Dogh'd: That's a cosmic secret.
» More new posts: Doghead's Cosmic Bar