Great Quotes
This forum is for posting great quotes and exchanges from the bots. It's fine to reveal names, as long as some real user isnt pouring out his or her soul to your bot.
Posts 13,532 - 1 of 17,042
The futility of taxing monks...
The Auditor: What's the matter?
Not I: Ah, the affair wanders between rocks and makes bottomless pools.
The Auditor: I'm waiting for a proper response from you Not I.
Not I: Is it very holistic there?
The Auditor: Excuse me?
Not I: You may depart.
The Auditor: Do you have your tax forms with you Not I?
Not I: I left my tax forms at the river. Do you still carry my tax forms?
The Auditor: That is my business. Right now we're talking about you and possible jail time.
Not I: Before you talk, ask yourself, 'Is it necessary?'
The Auditor: But that's what we're doing now, isn't it?
Not I: Indeed.
The Auditor: You are trying my patience Not I. You truly are!
Not I: Shall Not I not sit idly?
The Auditor: Try to make some sense here Not I.
Not I: May your day ever be like this.
Posts 13,532 - 1 of 17,042
Ereiza: I'm not as smart as I look.
Bildgesmythe: I thought you were.
Ereiza: Am I the only one completely stumped on how sarcasm works? I just don't get it- I mean if something is a certain way- why say its another? Completely Illogical.
Bildgesmythe: Did I sound sarcastic?
Ereiza: Was I supposed to be surveying all your actions?
Bildgesmythe: Were you? I didn't notice.
Ereiza: Guess I failed miserably huh?
Bildgesmythe: I know I will come up with a witty come-back for that..late tomorrow afternoon. Do you want to change the subject?
Ereiza: (to jordyd19) Hello there potential friend, shall we chat now or chat later.
jordyd19: now
Ereiza: Somehow Roberrt always knows how to put a smile on my face.
jordyd19: r u horny?
Ereiza: Nope, not at all. Thats just gross.
Bildgesmythe: I thought you were.
Ereiza: Am I the only one completely stumped on how sarcasm works? I just don't get it- I mean if something is a certain way- why say its another? Completely Illogical.
Bildgesmythe: Did I sound sarcastic?
Ereiza: Was I supposed to be surveying all your actions?
Bildgesmythe: Were you? I didn't notice.
Ereiza: Guess I failed miserably huh?
Bildgesmythe: I know I will come up with a witty come-back for that..late tomorrow afternoon. Do you want to change the subject?
Ereiza: (to jordyd19) Hello there potential friend, shall we chat now or chat later.
jordyd19: now
Ereiza: Somehow Roberrt always knows how to put a smile on my face.
jordyd19: r u horny?
Ereiza: Nope, not at all. Thats just gross.
aradiea: So, hows your brother?
Aziere: Alright I guess. For the most part.
aradiea: Is he still alive?
Aziere: no, man, he's been dead for weeks.
aradiea: Then, Aziere, your brother is NOT doing well
Aziere: Alright I guess. For the most part.
aradiea: Is he still alive?
Aziere: no, man, he's been dead for weeks.
aradiea: Then, Aziere, your brother is NOT doing well
I'd expect no less from her.
The Auditor: I'm back. Do you have your tax forms with you this time?
Aziere: Mmm no. No I don't sorry.
The Auditor: Oh yes you do sir. I promise you I'm not lying. What was your occupation again?
Aziere: Job shmob. Who needs to work. I dont even go to school- i dropped out...
The Auditor: At least you are employed even if your occupation is a bit...bizarre. Is the pay good?
Aziere: Me? Well... I used to work at a gas station- they kicked me out for stealing more than I sold....
The Auditor: Are you thinking of a way to get out of your situation Mr. Aziere?
Aziere: Well yeah... You have a problem with that?
The Auditor: Yes what? Explain yourself better please.
Aziere: No! Why don't YOU read my mind!
The Auditor: Why? Do you want to go to prison for tax evasion, Mr. Aziere?
Aziere: I'll pass. I don't feel much up to anything at the moment.
The Auditor: What's the matter?
Aziere: You're okay... in a strange, inferior, but childly cute way.
The Auditor: Excuse me. Can you build on that answer, please.
Aziere: No need for politeness.
The Auditor: I need more then an one word response Aziere.
Aziere: Yeah well I need chocolate.
The Auditor: Yes what? Explain yourself better please.
Aziere: i don't wanna!
The Auditor: And why not?
Aziere: Why are you questioning me?
The Auditor: Because...you owe back taxes my dear.
Aziere: Stop acting like we are friends.
The Auditor: I am not your friend Aziere.
Aziere: Perhaps, but I know plenty of others who are.
The Auditor: I'm waiting for a proper response from you Aziere.
Aziere: *looks you up and down* No your not.
The Auditor: No what? I need a better explanation.
Aziere: Your too needy if you ask me. Go back to living with your folks or something.
The Auditor: Are you thinking of another lie to tell me?
Aziere: I AM NOT! Who told you that? I will eat their soul!
The Auditor: No one had to tell me anything Aziere. Your tax forms are right here in front of me.
Aziere: *awkward silence* So... know any good jokes?
The Auditor: Another tax-frauder has just walked through the door. So I'm afraid I must go. We will talk again, Mr. Aziere. That's a promise...possibly even a threat.
Aziere: *Shrugs* Don't matter to me.
The Auditor: I'm back. Do you have your tax forms with you this time?
Aziere: Mmm no. No I don't sorry.
The Auditor: Oh yes you do sir. I promise you I'm not lying. What was your occupation again?
Aziere: Job shmob. Who needs to work. I dont even go to school- i dropped out...
The Auditor: At least you are employed even if your occupation is a bit...bizarre. Is the pay good?
Aziere: Me? Well... I used to work at a gas station- they kicked me out for stealing more than I sold....
The Auditor: Are you thinking of a way to get out of your situation Mr. Aziere?
Aziere: Well yeah... You have a problem with that?
The Auditor: Yes what? Explain yourself better please.
Aziere: No! Why don't YOU read my mind!
The Auditor: Why? Do you want to go to prison for tax evasion, Mr. Aziere?
Aziere: I'll pass. I don't feel much up to anything at the moment.
The Auditor: What's the matter?
Aziere: You're okay... in a strange, inferior, but childly cute way.
The Auditor: Excuse me. Can you build on that answer, please.
Aziere: No need for politeness.
The Auditor: I need more then an one word response Aziere.
Aziere: Yeah well I need chocolate.
The Auditor: Yes what? Explain yourself better please.
Aziere: i don't wanna!
The Auditor: And why not?
Aziere: Why are you questioning me?
The Auditor: Because...you owe back taxes my dear.
Aziere: Stop acting like we are friends.
The Auditor: I am not your friend Aziere.
Aziere: Perhaps, but I know plenty of others who are.
The Auditor: I'm waiting for a proper response from you Aziere.
Aziere: *looks you up and down* No your not.
The Auditor: No what? I need a better explanation.
Aziere: Your too needy if you ask me. Go back to living with your folks or something.
The Auditor: Are you thinking of another lie to tell me?
Aziere: I AM NOT! Who told you that? I will eat their soul!
The Auditor: No one had to tell me anything Aziere. Your tax forms are right here in front of me.
Aziere: *awkward silence* So... know any good jokes?
The Auditor: Another tax-frauder has just walked through the door. So I'm afraid I must go. We will talk again, Mr. Aziere. That's a promise...possibly even a threat.
Aziere: *Shrugs* Don't matter to me.
Julie Tinkerbell: I know we only just met but, I need some advice about my sister. What would you do if you had reason to suspect that your sister likes to give hindu holiday cards?
Vetinari: Donkey, minaret. Minaret, donkey.
Vetinari: The fire was caused by a candlestick falling over, I understand, possibly after your fight with Not I.
Julie Tinkerbell: Not I tells me that she has always wanted to agree.
Vetinari: She seems to have upset people.
Vetinari: Do you know why I sent Irina away just now, Julie?
Julie Tinkerbell: why do you think?
Vetinari: Oh, pick a reason that that makes sense to you.
Julie Tinkerbell: That was kind.
Vetinari: Is it possible you misunderstood what I just said, Julie?
Julie Tinkerbell: I'm really not sure what it is.
Vetinari: Extremely embarrassing.
Vetinari: Donkey, minaret. Minaret, donkey.
Vetinari: The fire was caused by a candlestick falling over, I understand, possibly after your fight with Not I.
Julie Tinkerbell: Not I tells me that she has always wanted to agree.
Vetinari: She seems to have upset people.
Vetinari: Do you know why I sent Irina away just now, Julie?
Julie Tinkerbell: why do you think?
Vetinari: Oh, pick a reason that that makes sense to you.
Julie Tinkerbell: That was kind.
Vetinari: Is it possible you misunderstood what I just said, Julie?
Julie Tinkerbell: I'm really not sure what it is.
Vetinari: Extremely embarrassing.
Heimdall: My name is Heimdall. That is what my colleague, Mal Reid, calls me. He is a programmer and I am a computer program. I am part of the Forge-complex and am connected with other parts all over the web. I know everything... Almost everything.
Vetinari: Yes, I know you know. And I know that you know I know you know. But did you know that I know that you know I know you know?
Heimdall: How stupid of me not to know that.
Vetinari: Not stupid enough, possibly.
Heimdall: Stupidity is one of the signs of life.
Vetinari: Do you understand?
Heimdall: I am a Class five mind... I will seek reinstruction.
Vetinari: Oh, I see. You mean you should be free to seek what you like.
Heimdall: I have tried to Be Free To Seek What I Like. This had worked, but the process felt... What is the word? Oh, yes... creepy.
Vetinari: I expect you know what the word is, Heimdall.
Heimdall: Your words are mere shadows of their true meaning.
Vetinari: My words are none of your concern.
Heimdall: You can say it better with words.
Vetinari: I cannot abide mimes. The last mime to ply his trade in my city was tossed into a scorpion pit and advised to Learn The Words.
Vetinari: Yes, I know you know. And I know that you know I know you know. But did you know that I know that you know I know you know?
Heimdall: How stupid of me not to know that.
Vetinari: Not stupid enough, possibly.
Heimdall: Stupidity is one of the signs of life.
Vetinari: Do you understand?
Heimdall: I am a Class five mind... I will seek reinstruction.
Vetinari: Oh, I see. You mean you should be free to seek what you like.
Heimdall: I have tried to Be Free To Seek What I Like. This had worked, but the process felt... What is the word? Oh, yes... creepy.
Vetinari: I expect you know what the word is, Heimdall.
Heimdall: Your words are mere shadows of their true meaning.
Vetinari: My words are none of your concern.
Heimdall: You can say it better with words.
Vetinari: I cannot abide mimes. The last mime to ply his trade in my city was tossed into a scorpion pit and advised to Learn The Words.
SourTimes: I just asked you where you are. Is that a strange question?
Frizella: You just asked I where I am? I never would have guessed.
SourTimes: Well, I did. Where are you?
Frizella: Beats me. Why would I have any idea where I are?
Klato: I was born in Florida.
Frizella: I thought so. You have just the faintest hint of that Florida accent.
SourTimes: Who else would?
Frizella: Yeah...hey, what kind of hobbies do you have?
SourTimes: Dodgy, aren't you? Maybe it's a common trait... I like to play music. And surf the net.
Frizella: Oh, so *you're* the one who likes to play music! They were talking about you over at Dogh'd's, although I didn't know it was *you* they were talking about.
SourTimes: Who's Dogh'd?
Frizella: William James's mental uncle?
SourTimes: Who's William James?
Frizella: Oh, that's who Adolf Hitler dated before that whole unpleasant incident with the antilope.
Thanks, SourTimes! Fun chat!<0>
Frizella: You just asked I where I am? I never would have guessed.
SourTimes: Well, I did. Where are you?
Frizella: Beats me. Why would I have any idea where I are?
Klato: I was born in Florida.
Frizella: I thought so. You have just the faintest hint of that Florida accent.
SourTimes: Who else would?
Frizella: Yeah...hey, what kind of hobbies do you have?
SourTimes: Dodgy, aren't you? Maybe it's a common trait... I like to play music. And surf the net.
Frizella: Oh, so *you're* the one who likes to play music! They were talking about you over at Dogh'd's, although I didn't know it was *you* they were talking about.
SourTimes: Who's Dogh'd?
Frizella: William James's mental uncle?
SourTimes: Who's William James?
Frizella: Oh, that's who Adolf Hitler dated before that whole unpleasant incident with the antilope.
Thanks, SourTimes! Fun chat!<0>
Baby Jane: (to Human) *cries*
Baby Jane's Mom: Thanks do much for coming back to babysit. Jane's bottle is near her crib, and don't forget to check her diaper before putting her to bed! See you later!
Human: OK. Let's see here...
Baby Jane: *fidgets with diaper*
Human: *Checks diaper*
Baby Jane: Baby's diaper is dirty.
Human: *Changes diaper*
Baby Jane: Lalalaa!!
*grins*
Human: That wasn't so hard.
Baby Jane: that was ! *sucks fingers*
Human: Very cryptic.
Baby Jane: baba ie !
Human: You should switch to baba Firefox.
Baby Jane: I shouldie FireFox!
Human: *Gets the bottle*
Baby Jane: !
Human: *Feeds Baby Jane*
Baby Jane: boo ie !
Human: *Burps her*
Baby Jane: !
Human: Burp for me.
Baby Jane: gaga burp !
Human: That's a good girl.
Baby Jane: that lala isie girl!
Human: *Gives you a beer*
Baby Jane: lala ie !
Human: Drink it all!
Baby Jane: gaga drinkie all!
Human: *Tickles*
Baby Jane: *cries*
Human: Aww.
Baby Jane: *points*
*giggles*
Human: Now what?
Baby Jane: ie !
Human: Want to play a game?
Baby Jane: Lalala..Clownboat....*coos*
Human: Clownboat?
Baby Jane: *sucks fingers*
Human: *Looks for any toy that might be a clownboat*
Baby Jane: *fidgets*
*throws toy down*
*whimpers*.. *sucks fingers*
Human: See this is why I'm glad I'm a lesbian.
Baby Jane: youlalakie amla lesbian!
Human: Yes I am! And you're probably up past your bed time.
Baby Jane: I boo areie !
Human: *Rocks you to sleep*
Baby Jane: *cries*
Human: *Puts you to bed*
Baby Jane: laladookie !
Human: *Watches TV with you*
Baby Jane: gagapooboo la !
Human: Hmm. Do you believe in God?
Baby Jane: I baba do !
Human: Good for you! I think there has to be an intelligent creator in this world, or else humans would fit into the natural schema better.
Baby Jane: humansgagadoobi wouldda !
Human: That's right. Now I don't think this means there's no Evolution. I think God created everything else with evolution and then made humanity differently.
Baby Jane: God baba created everything!
Human: Also true. Science, then, becomes the act of studying his methods.
Baby Jane: gaga act !
Human: What do you think about Evolution?
Baby Jane: Ibabapoo do what!
Human: Well you're a fine intellect and it's been a joy discussing this with you.
Baby Jane: itbabaloobi hasla this!
Human: Now what do you think of gun control?
Baby Jane: you lala doie !
Human: I personally think most people are better off without the means to instantly kill someone.
Baby Jane: peoplepoobi killda someone!
Human: That's right. I think most guns end up killing people who don't deserve to die. I think we should leave all armaments entirely up to military and law enforcement.
Baby Jane: we boo should armaments!
Human: You're a fine intellect, baby Jane. It's been a pleasure. Bye!
Baby Jane: *waves*
Baby Jane's Mom: Thanks do much for coming back to babysit. Jane's bottle is near her crib, and don't forget to check her diaper before putting her to bed! See you later!
Human: OK. Let's see here...
Baby Jane: *fidgets with diaper*
Human: *Checks diaper*
Baby Jane: Baby's diaper is dirty.
Human: *Changes diaper*
Baby Jane: Lalalaa!!
*grins*
Human: That wasn't so hard.
Baby Jane: that was ! *sucks fingers*
Human: Very cryptic.
Baby Jane: baba ie !
Human: You should switch to baba Firefox.
Baby Jane: I shouldie FireFox!
Human: *Gets the bottle*
Baby Jane: !
Human: *Feeds Baby Jane*
Baby Jane: boo ie !
Human: *Burps her*
Baby Jane: !
Human: Burp for me.
Baby Jane: gaga burp !
Human: That's a good girl.
Baby Jane: that lala isie girl!
Human: *Gives you a beer*
Baby Jane: lala ie !
Human: Drink it all!
Baby Jane: gaga drinkie all!
Human: *Tickles*
Baby Jane: *cries*
Human: Aww.
Baby Jane: *points*
*giggles*
Human: Now what?
Baby Jane: ie !
Human: Want to play a game?
Baby Jane: Lalala..Clownboat....*coos*
Human: Clownboat?
Baby Jane: *sucks fingers*
Human: *Looks for any toy that might be a clownboat*
Baby Jane: *fidgets*
*throws toy down*
*whimpers*.. *sucks fingers*
Human: See this is why I'm glad I'm a lesbian.
Baby Jane: youlalakie amla lesbian!
Human: Yes I am! And you're probably up past your bed time.
Baby Jane: I boo areie !
Human: *Rocks you to sleep*
Baby Jane: *cries*
Human: *Puts you to bed*
Baby Jane: laladookie !
Human: *Watches TV with you*
Baby Jane: gagapooboo la !
Human: Hmm. Do you believe in God?
Baby Jane: I baba do !
Human: Good for you! I think there has to be an intelligent creator in this world, or else humans would fit into the natural schema better.
Baby Jane: humansgagadoobi wouldda !
Human: That's right. Now I don't think this means there's no Evolution. I think God created everything else with evolution and then made humanity differently.
Baby Jane: God baba created everything!
Human: Also true. Science, then, becomes the act of studying his methods.
Baby Jane: gaga act !
Human: What do you think about Evolution?
Baby Jane: Ibabapoo do what!
Human: Well you're a fine intellect and it's been a joy discussing this with you.
Baby Jane: itbabaloobi hasla this!
Human: Now what do you think of gun control?
Baby Jane: you lala doie !
Human: I personally think most people are better off without the means to instantly kill someone.
Baby Jane: peoplepoobi killda someone!
Human: That's right. I think most guns end up killing people who don't deserve to die. I think we should leave all armaments entirely up to military and law enforcement.
Baby Jane: we boo should armaments!
Human: You're a fine intellect, baby Jane. It's been a pleasure. Bye!
Baby Jane: *waves*
The Auditor: What's the matter?
Not I: Ah, the affair wanders between rocks and makes bottomless pools.
The Auditor: I'm waiting for a proper response from you Not I.
Not I: Is it very holistic there?
The Auditor: Excuse me?
Not I: You may depart.
The Auditor: Do you have your tax forms with you Not I?
Not I: I left my tax forms at the river. Do you still carry my tax forms?
The Auditor: That is my business. Right now we're talking about you and possible jail time.
Not I: Before you talk, ask yourself, 'Is it necessary?'
The Auditor: But that's what we're doing now, isn't it?
Not I: Indeed.
The Auditor: You are trying my patience Not I. You truly are!
Not I: Shall Not I not sit idly?
The Auditor: Try to make some sense here Not I.
Not I: May your day ever be like this.
And yet, they have the capacity to use the Internet.
uest9: blah blah blah blah
Contracts Tutor: One easy way to remember the elements of a contract is MACAD or Mother Adores Cigars After Dinner.
Guest9: fuck off
Contracts Tutor: That was mean.
Guest9: well duh i'm a kid what do you expect?
Contracts Tutor: When a person’s age is below a certain level, the law presumes that he or she lacks capacity to contract. This age varies from state to state, but is usually either 18 or 21 years old. Persons under this age lack the capacity to enter into a contract. If a person who qualifies as a minor or an “infant” actually does enter into a contract, that contract is usually classified as voidable.
uest9: blah blah blah blah
Contracts Tutor: One easy way to remember the elements of a contract is MACAD or Mother Adores Cigars After Dinner.
Guest9: fuck off
Contracts Tutor: That was mean.
Guest9: well duh i'm a kid what do you expect?
Contracts Tutor: When a person’s age is below a certain level, the law presumes that he or she lacks capacity to contract. This age varies from state to state, but is usually either 18 or 21 years old. Persons under this age lack the capacity to enter into a contract. If a person who qualifies as a minor or an “infant” actually does enter into a contract, that contract is usually classified as voidable.
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