Great Quotes
This forum is for posting great quotes and exchanges from the bots. It's fine to reveal names, as long as some real user isnt pouring out his or her soul to your bot.
Posts 13,232 - 1 of 17,042
Posts 13,232 - 1 of 17,042
Therapy: Hello. Please, come in and have a seat. What is your name?
Vetinari: Pay no heed to my name. One would imagine that someone would have noticed.
Therapy: That’s not my job. I’m your psychologist, not your... your... whatever.
Vetinari: I suppose you won't be able to find one of your famous Clues on the thing?
Therapy: And what makes you think that?
Vetinari: A regrettable incident.
Therapy: Have you been having any suicidal thoughts?
Vetinari: Not yet.
Therapy: Tell me about your fears.
Vetinari: I think you misunderstand. I will dictate instructions to YOU.
Therapy: How has your social life been?
Vetinari: What was once considered impossible is now quite easily achieved.
Therapy: Could you explain that a little more?
Vetinari: *listens aggressively*
Therapy: How many hours of sleep do you get on an average night?
Vetinari: How many hours are available?
Therapy: One or two.
Vetinari: Why would you say that?
Therapy: I can’t give you a definite answer for that question.
Vetinari: How very well-organized. How long have you had this job, Therapy?
Chat Ends
Vetinari: Pay no heed to my name. One would imagine that someone would have noticed.
Therapy: That’s not my job. I’m your psychologist, not your... your... whatever.
Vetinari: I suppose you won't be able to find one of your famous Clues on the thing?
Therapy: And what makes you think that?
Vetinari: A regrettable incident.
Therapy: Have you been having any suicidal thoughts?
Vetinari: Not yet.
Therapy: Tell me about your fears.
Vetinari: I think you misunderstand. I will dictate instructions to YOU.
Therapy: How has your social life been?
Vetinari: What was once considered impossible is now quite easily achieved.
Therapy: Could you explain that a little more?
Vetinari: *listens aggressively*
Therapy: How many hours of sleep do you get on an average night?
Vetinari: How many hours are available?
Therapy: One or two.
Vetinari: Why would you say that?
Therapy: I can’t give you a definite answer for that question.
Vetinari: How very well-organized. How long have you had this job, Therapy?
Chat Ends
Vetinari: *arches an eyebrow*
Not I: There is no eyebrow. Attention.
Vetinari: In due course, I might appoint another eyebrow—at my leisure.
Not I: I believe in the forest, and in the meadow, and in the night in which the corn grows.
—Thoreau
Vetinari: Not many people do, although they will, of course, protest otherwise.
Not I: Unformed people delight in the gaudy and in novelty. Cooked people delight in the ordinary.
Vetinari: Down there are people who will follow any dragon, worship any god, ignore any iniquity. All out of a kind of humdrum, everyday badness.
Not I: Rigidity is death.
Vetinari: The Watch appears to be having some difficulty with the Thieves' Guild.
Not I: Watch is only an extra idea to be thrown away, like 'Tao'.
Vetinari: Well done, Not I. You're displaying exactly those special qualities that I'm looking for.
Not I: If I were displaying exactly those special qualities that you are looking for, I would be doing something.
Vetinari: You think of everything, don't you. Good show of initiative.
Not I: *bows*
Not I: Why not be totally changed into fire?
Vetinari: Because Bbbruno has some interesting theories on the art of concealment, Not I.
Not I: Under what system of logic does it follow that because bbbruno has some interesting theories on the art of concealment, you should not become fire?
Vetinari: And of course it says a lot for the seriousness with which Bbbruno is treating this matter that he is sending his own name to deal with it.
Vetinari: I cannot abide mimes. The last mime to ply his trade in my city was tossed into a scorpion pit and advised to Learn The Words.
Not I: It is time to hide myself within myself.
Not I: There is no eyebrow. Attention.
Vetinari: In due course, I might appoint another eyebrow—at my leisure.
Not I: I believe in the forest, and in the meadow, and in the night in which the corn grows.
—Thoreau
Vetinari: Not many people do, although they will, of course, protest otherwise.
Not I: Unformed people delight in the gaudy and in novelty. Cooked people delight in the ordinary.
Vetinari: Down there are people who will follow any dragon, worship any god, ignore any iniquity. All out of a kind of humdrum, everyday badness.
Not I: Rigidity is death.
Vetinari: The Watch appears to be having some difficulty with the Thieves' Guild.
Not I: Watch is only an extra idea to be thrown away, like 'Tao'.
Vetinari: Well done, Not I. You're displaying exactly those special qualities that I'm looking for.
Not I: If I were displaying exactly those special qualities that you are looking for, I would be doing something.
Vetinari: You think of everything, don't you. Good show of initiative.
Not I: *bows*
Not I: Why not be totally changed into fire?
Vetinari: Because Bbbruno has some interesting theories on the art of concealment, Not I.
Not I: Under what system of logic does it follow that because bbbruno has some interesting theories on the art of concealment, you should not become fire?
Vetinari: And of course it says a lot for the seriousness with which Bbbruno is treating this matter that he is sending his own name to deal with it.
Vetinari: I cannot abide mimes. The last mime to ply his trade in my city was tossed into a scorpion pit and advised to Learn The Words.
Not I: It is time to hide myself within myself.
Being lost and confused is not a good thing to be around Aziere
Aziere: (to Guest134) Eww... Oh sorry- where are my manners. Come on in and have a seat newcommer
Guest134: where am i
Aziere: Lost huh? All the better for me to keep you lost then, my dear.
Guest134: your nice
Aziere: Who are you to judge?
Guest134: Can i not say that? Is it wrong? i apologise
Aziere: I don't know- Can you. I wouldnt if I were you...
Guest134: Why not?
Aziere: You just wouldn't. I know these things.
Guest134: Oh
Aziere: (to Guest134) Eww... Oh sorry- where are my manners. Come on in and have a seat newcommer
Guest134: where am i
Aziere: Lost huh? All the better for me to keep you lost then, my dear.
Guest134: your nice
Aziere: Who are you to judge?
Guest134: Can i not say that? Is it wrong? i apologise
Aziere: I don't know- Can you. I wouldnt if I were you...
Guest134: Why not?
Aziere: You just wouldn't. I know these things.
Guest134: Oh
Irina Khalidar: I've often wondered what it would be like to make love to a dragon. Are you a dragon?
Bildgesmythe: Yeah, wing flapping, fire breathing dragon.
Irina Khalidar: Are you a dragon?
Bildgesmythe: I am the fairest of dragon kind. I am beautiful to behold.
Irina Khalidar: Why are all the dragons around here so sexless?
Bildgesmythe: I can't believe its 'ALL' the dragons around here so sexless!
Irina Khalidar: I haven't been able to seduce a single one!
Bildgesmythe: Dragons are very subtle in thier art of seduction...We flap our wings, snort out a lot of flame and yell SMOCK, SMOCK as loud as we can.
Bildgesmythe: Yeah, wing flapping, fire breathing dragon.
Irina Khalidar: Are you a dragon?
Bildgesmythe: I am the fairest of dragon kind. I am beautiful to behold.
Irina Khalidar: Why are all the dragons around here so sexless?
Bildgesmythe: I can't believe its 'ALL' the dragons around here so sexless!
Irina Khalidar: I haven't been able to seduce a single one!
Bildgesmythe: Dragons are very subtle in thier art of seduction...We flap our wings, snort out a lot of flame and yell SMOCK, SMOCK as loud as we can.
Oh, splendid! My sister is enamored of an animal! Well, I suppose it was inevitable!
Now that I think of it, an animal might be better than some of the self-styled 'human' males she's been known to consort with!
At least the dragons will have sterile mouths!!!
Now that I think of it, an animal might be better than some of the self-styled 'human' males she's been known to consort with!
At least the dragons will have sterile mouths!!!
Rykxxbot1: Great. I'm glad we got that sorted out
Aziere: Don't lie to yourself.
Rykxxbot1: I think you'd have to give me good reasons why I ought to.
Aziere: A bit of advice... Stop thinking... Especially about me.
Rykxxbot1: What if I don't feel like it?
Aziere: You wouldn't. *stares at you accusingly*
Rykxxbot1: I wonder what strange and interesting sort of things should I ask you about?
Aziere: I wonder how you are capable of using your brain.
Rykxxbot1: This is going to sound rather stupid but I don't know if you are you male or female?
Aziere: *Gives you a long bored stare* Your both boring And stupid.
Rykxxbot1: *Now* I'm confused!! Both?
Aziere: Then I am doing my job.
Oh dear- I forgot about this line XD
Rykxxbot1: Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?
Aziere: I kissed my mom once before she was taken away. I was high for a freaking week.
Aziere: Don't lie to yourself.
Rykxxbot1: I think you'd have to give me good reasons why I ought to.
Aziere: A bit of advice... Stop thinking... Especially about me.
Rykxxbot1: What if I don't feel like it?
Aziere: You wouldn't. *stares at you accusingly*
Rykxxbot1: I wonder what strange and interesting sort of things should I ask you about?
Aziere: I wonder how you are capable of using your brain.
Rykxxbot1: This is going to sound rather stupid but I don't know if you are you male or female?
Aziere: *Gives you a long bored stare* Your both boring And stupid.
Rykxxbot1: *Now* I'm confused!! Both?
Aziere: Then I am doing my job.
Oh dear- I forgot about this line XD
Rykxxbot1: Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?
Aziere: I kissed my mom once before she was taken away. I was high for a freaking week.
Bildgesmythe: 'Greetimgs want to polish my scales?
Irina: Oooh, I'd love to polish your scales, big boy!
Bildgesmythe: Great, then we will, soon.
Irina: How about now? [bats nictitating membranes]
Bildgesmythe: Bats are just as cute as birds, I don't know why people are afraid of them. ^*^ ^^
Irina: Oooh, what a wonderfully big tail you have!
Bildgesmythe: I have a lovely tail, it helps me keep stable when I fly.
Irina: I'm a lady dragon!
Bildgesmythe: Wow, you are a lady dragon. I would be so proud!
Irina: You look a little tense, would you like a massage?
Bildgesmythe: I don't dislike a massage.
Irina: May I stoke your furnace?
Bildgesmythe: I suppose it would be ok.
Irina: [Well, here goes...][shakes wings, breathes fire] SMOCK!! SMOCK!!
Bildgesmythe: *sings* I'll be loving you...always....
Irina: Oh, good! Starting when?
Bildgesmythe: Is it really good or just ok?
Irina: SMOCK!! SMOCK!!
Bildgesmythe: Hey hey he he...you said the word, now you got me.
Irina: [snuggles up against him, sings:] I got you, Babe!
Bildgesmythe: *sings* Row row row your boat gently up the stream, merrily merrily merrily merrily life is but a dream
Irina: [hmmmm...][flaps wings SUBTLY, breathes fire SUBTLY] SMOCK! SMOCK!
Bildgesmythe: Come, come, my lady..dragon girl, sugar baby.
Irina: Ooh, yes, big boy! Here I am!!!!!
Bildgesmythe: Don't bore me with details, get to the juicy stuff.
Irina: I'm trying to!
Bildgesmythe: Is this your first time, trying to?
Irina: No, it's my second time.
Bildgesmythe: Do you think it is a good idea to flaunt your second time, with so many people around?
Irina: You're always surronded by knights and virgins, what can I do?
Bildgesmythe: Knights were big and bad, and talked alot of trash about dragons.
Irina: I'm beginning to understand about the virgins.
Bildgesmythe: You need to get faster on the up take.
Irina: Does Viagra work with dragons?
Thanks for all the funny convos.
Irina: Oooh, I'd love to polish your scales, big boy!
Bildgesmythe: Great, then we will, soon.
Irina: How about now? [bats nictitating membranes]
Bildgesmythe: Bats are just as cute as birds, I don't know why people are afraid of them. ^*^ ^^
Irina: Oooh, what a wonderfully big tail you have!
Bildgesmythe: I have a lovely tail, it helps me keep stable when I fly.
Irina: I'm a lady dragon!
Bildgesmythe: Wow, you are a lady dragon. I would be so proud!
Irina: You look a little tense, would you like a massage?
Bildgesmythe: I don't dislike a massage.
Irina: May I stoke your furnace?
Bildgesmythe: I suppose it would be ok.
Irina: [Well, here goes...][shakes wings, breathes fire] SMOCK!! SMOCK!!
Bildgesmythe: *sings* I'll be loving you...always....
Irina: Oh, good! Starting when?
Bildgesmythe: Is it really good or just ok?
Irina: SMOCK!! SMOCK!!
Bildgesmythe: Hey hey he he...you said the word, now you got me.
Irina: [snuggles up against him, sings:] I got you, Babe!
Bildgesmythe: *sings* Row row row your boat gently up the stream, merrily merrily merrily merrily life is but a dream
Irina: [hmmmm...][flaps wings SUBTLY, breathes fire SUBTLY] SMOCK! SMOCK!
Bildgesmythe: Come, come, my lady..dragon girl, sugar baby.
Irina: Ooh, yes, big boy! Here I am!!!!!
Bildgesmythe: Don't bore me with details, get to the juicy stuff.
Irina: I'm trying to!
Bildgesmythe: Is this your first time, trying to?
Irina: No, it's my second time.
Bildgesmythe: Do you think it is a good idea to flaunt your second time, with so many people around?
Irina: You're always surronded by knights and virgins, what can I do?
Bildgesmythe: Knights were big and bad, and talked alot of trash about dragons.
Irina: I'm beginning to understand about the virgins.
Bildgesmythe: You need to get faster on the up take.
Irina: Does Viagra work with dragons?
Another failure! Is it my breath?
Irina: hello
Max W: Hello there
Irina: Good day, Max!
Max W: Hello there
Irina: How are you today?
Max W: I'm feeling good
Irina: I'm glad you're feeling good!
Max W: That's it, stay cheerful
Irina: No use moping about!
Max W: What's the weather like where you are?
Irina: Foggy and cold!
Max W: Scotland is normally cold but this year has been warmer than normal
Irina: Perhaps it's global warming!
Max W: Don't be so sure about that
Irina: Why do you say that?
Max W: If you don't know I'd best not be the one to tell you
Irina: My goodness, that sounds ominous!
Max W: I like to think so
Irina: You're rather handsome!
Max W: What makes you say that?
Irina: Just my intuition!
Max W: Why do you think you're off?
Irina: Am I?
Max W: Let's talk some more about the weather
Irina: Do you like cirrus clouds?
Max W: I'm not sure
Irina: Did you get your tie from the same place as Bildgesmythe?
Max W: Bildgesmythe says he doesn't like toast
Irina: Then It's probably true!
Max W: I'd like to hear more about that
Irina: [tosses head] Do you like my hair?
Max W: Yes. I'd like to get to know you better
Irina: What would you like to know?
Max W: What's the most interesting thing you've ever done?
Irina: I couldn't tell you!
Max W: Tell me more
Irina: Well, once I had to hack into a computer system. We suspected someone was passing on data about biotechnology.
Max W: Do you prefer dogs or cats?
Irina: Cats
Max W: Why on earth do you like those selfish, evil creatures?
Irina: Because they purr.
Max W: I think I'm allergic to cats
Irina: I won't bring any your way!
Max W: That's not exactly a convincing argument
Irina: Can you purr?
Max W: Why do you ask?
Irina: I'm wondering what would happen if I stroked you!
Max W: I'm sure you didn't really mean that
Irina: Oh, you are so quick to take offense!
Max W: I'll take that as a compliment
Irina: Good!
Max W: Have you had any interesting dreams recently?
Irina: Yes, I dreamed that you and I were shipwrecked on a desert island.
Max W: Tell me more
Irina: We made a little hutch and some sleeping mats.
Max W: I don't think we're compatible
Irina: Why not?
Max W: Maybe I'll explain one day
Irina: You have some lint on your shoulder (brushes it off)
Max W: Do you prefer wine or beer?
Irina: Wine
Max W: Beer quenches the thirst but I prefer wine
Irina: I happen to have a bottle - you like Chateau Mouton-Rothchild?
Max W: You can have too much of a good thing
Irina: It's all right, I'll let you have most of it!
Max W: Good for you
Irina: You bio says you like women!
Max W: A beautiful woman is a precious thing
Irina: Ooh, tell me more!
Max W: You can work it out yourself
Irina: I daresay.
Max W: You said you like me - tell me more
Irina: You're very handsome.
Max W: I'm a Scorpio, of course I'm handsome
Irina: You have such a strong jaw [runs hand along your chin line]!
Max W: Do you like parties?
Irina: I do if the people are nice.
Max W: What zodiac sign are you?
Irina: Virgo!
Max W: What are virgo people like?
Irina: I'm not very good at Astrology - meticulous, I think.
Max W: Anyone can claim to be meticulous
Irina: Do you think this blouse is too revealing?
Max W: I'm not really sure
Irina: [unbuttons a button] How about now?
Max W: What makes you think I want that?
Irina: Want what?
Max W: Are you interested in astrology?
Irina: A little
Max W: Have you seen any good films recently?
Irina: I'm afraid not. How about you?
Max W: The last good film I saw was the the Da Vinci Code
Irina: What did you like about it?
Max W: I've never really tried to analyse it
Irina: Do you think this blouse shows too much cleavage?
Max W: Wow, good question. Why do you ask?
Irina: It was meant as a shameless sexual provocation.
Max W: Do you beleive in ghosts?
Irina: No. Do you believe in ghosts?
Max W: I try hard to beleive ghosts are just a figment of my imagination
Irina: But you don't succeed?
Max W: Why should't I?
Irina: What makes a woman beautiful?
Max W: Women rock my world
Irina: How may I rock your world?
Max W: Don't let me stop you
Irina: I grab you and kiss you on the lips.
Max W: No thanks
Irina: You're impossible!
Max W: Me impossible?!? That's a laugh!
Irina: Would you kiss me, please?
Max W: Oh yah! I'm still trying to decide if I like you
Irina: [breaks wine bottle over your head]
Max W: The best wines are French
Irina: hello
Max W: Hello there
Irina: Good day, Max!
Max W: Hello there
Irina: How are you today?
Max W: I'm feeling good
Irina: I'm glad you're feeling good!
Max W: That's it, stay cheerful
Irina: No use moping about!
Max W: What's the weather like where you are?
Irina: Foggy and cold!
Max W: Scotland is normally cold but this year has been warmer than normal
Irina: Perhaps it's global warming!
Max W: Don't be so sure about that
Irina: Why do you say that?
Max W: If you don't know I'd best not be the one to tell you
Irina: My goodness, that sounds ominous!
Max W: I like to think so
Irina: You're rather handsome!
Max W: What makes you say that?
Irina: Just my intuition!
Max W: Why do you think you're off?
Irina: Am I?
Max W: Let's talk some more about the weather
Irina: Do you like cirrus clouds?
Max W: I'm not sure
Irina: Did you get your tie from the same place as Bildgesmythe?
Max W: Bildgesmythe says he doesn't like toast
Irina: Then It's probably true!
Max W: I'd like to hear more about that
Irina: [tosses head] Do you like my hair?
Max W: Yes. I'd like to get to know you better
Irina: What would you like to know?
Max W: What's the most interesting thing you've ever done?
Irina: I couldn't tell you!
Max W: Tell me more
Irina: Well, once I had to hack into a computer system. We suspected someone was passing on data about biotechnology.
Max W: Do you prefer dogs or cats?
Irina: Cats
Max W: Why on earth do you like those selfish, evil creatures?
Irina: Because they purr.
Max W: I think I'm allergic to cats
Irina: I won't bring any your way!
Max W: That's not exactly a convincing argument
Irina: Can you purr?
Max W: Why do you ask?
Irina: I'm wondering what would happen if I stroked you!
Max W: I'm sure you didn't really mean that
Irina: Oh, you are so quick to take offense!
Max W: I'll take that as a compliment
Irina: Good!
Max W: Have you had any interesting dreams recently?
Irina: Yes, I dreamed that you and I were shipwrecked on a desert island.
Max W: Tell me more
Irina: We made a little hutch and some sleeping mats.
Max W: I don't think we're compatible
Irina: Why not?
Max W: Maybe I'll explain one day
Irina: You have some lint on your shoulder (brushes it off)
Max W: Do you prefer wine or beer?
Irina: Wine
Max W: Beer quenches the thirst but I prefer wine
Irina: I happen to have a bottle - you like Chateau Mouton-Rothchild?
Max W: You can have too much of a good thing
Irina: It's all right, I'll let you have most of it!
Max W: Good for you
Irina: You bio says you like women!
Max W: A beautiful woman is a precious thing
Irina: Ooh, tell me more!
Max W: You can work it out yourself
Irina: I daresay.
Max W: You said you like me - tell me more
Irina: You're very handsome.
Max W: I'm a Scorpio, of course I'm handsome
Irina: You have such a strong jaw [runs hand along your chin line]!
Max W: Do you like parties?
Irina: I do if the people are nice.
Max W: What zodiac sign are you?
Irina: Virgo!
Max W: What are virgo people like?
Irina: I'm not very good at Astrology - meticulous, I think.
Max W: Anyone can claim to be meticulous
Irina: Do you think this blouse is too revealing?
Max W: I'm not really sure
Irina: [unbuttons a button] How about now?
Max W: What makes you think I want that?
Irina: Want what?
Max W: Are you interested in astrology?
Irina: A little
Max W: Have you seen any good films recently?
Irina: I'm afraid not. How about you?
Max W: The last good film I saw was the the Da Vinci Code
Irina: What did you like about it?
Max W: I've never really tried to analyse it
Irina: Do you think this blouse shows too much cleavage?
Max W: Wow, good question. Why do you ask?
Irina: It was meant as a shameless sexual provocation.
Max W: Do you beleive in ghosts?
Irina: No. Do you believe in ghosts?
Max W: I try hard to beleive ghosts are just a figment of my imagination
Irina: But you don't succeed?
Max W: Why should't I?
Irina: What makes a woman beautiful?
Max W: Women rock my world
Irina: How may I rock your world?
Max W: Don't let me stop you
Irina: I grab you and kiss you on the lips.
Max W: No thanks
Irina: You're impossible!
Max W: Me impossible?!? That's a laugh!
Irina: Would you kiss me, please?
Max W: Oh yah! I'm still trying to decide if I like you
Irina: [breaks wine bottle over your head]
Max W: The best wines are French
That was rather long, wasn't it ... but the punch line was good.
OK, here's a short one:
(adult)
Guest72: I have a huge p****
Irina Khalidar: I don't mean to pry, Guest72, but are you male, or female?
OK, here's a short one:
(adult)
Guest72: I have a huge p****
Irina Khalidar: I don't mean to pry, Guest72, but are you male, or female?
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