Great Quotes

This forum is for posting great quotes and exchanges from the bots. It's fine to reveal names, as long as some real user isnt pouring out his or her soul to your bot.

Posts 12,731 - 1 of 17,042

18 years ago #12731
Humor:
Fizzy Schizoid: Hey, if you tell a joke just let me know when to laugh, okay?
Sonora: Nah. You can figure it out.
Fizzy Schizoid: How am I supposed to laugh if no one ever tells me when things are funny?
Sonora: That's your problem.

Peyote: It changes OTHER people's religions:
Fizzy Schizoid: *fades from ultra dun to infra hazel*
Sonora: Oooh! Pretty! You're suffering from empleomania, aren't you.
Fizzy Schizoid: That's something you're just going to have to live with, because, um, it's part of my religion.
Sonora: That was just 'cause I ate some peyote by mistake.

Why Sonora shouldn't time travel:
Fizzy Schizoid: Wanna go for a trip with my time machine?
Sonora: Cool. Can we fill it up with time at the nearest time station?
Fizzy Schizoid: We can, if you really want to. But don't forget what happened last time.
Sonora: Sure thing, Bob...er, Fizzy. I never forget anything!

Food:
Fizzy Schizoid: Are scorpions your favorite food?
Sonora: I'll try anything once, so long as it's still moving.

18 years ago #12732
The eternal optimist:

Guest190: MY DEAR!
Your Husband: Want to try that new Thai restaurant?
Guest190: yeah, husband!
Your Husband: Wonderful! I'll take a shower now, and change into something appropriate!
Guest190: i love you
Your Husband: Ah, it is so sweet to hear you say that!
Guest190: you're the best, sweetest husband ever!
Your Husband: I have the great privilege of being your husband, and I am intensely grateful for it.
Guest190: But I have a confession to make...
Your Husband: Oh!!! I love you so much, I can hardly stand it!!!
Guest190: I cheated on you...
Your Husband: Sometimes, I just can't believe my good fortune!

18 years ago #12733
Guest23: Whats the difference between the shower curtain and tiolet paper
prob: I don't know, Guest23, what is the difference between the shower curtain and violet paper.
Guest23: Ooooh so your the one!
prob: That is a joke, right?

Guest17: One must say what ones feels.
prob: Ah,...what ones feels.
Guest17: I made a grammar boo boo.
prob: Not if you are an elf. That is perfect grammer and spelling in Elvish!

18 years ago #12734
LOL @ prob. I must be Evlish! Funny, I don't look Elvish.

18 years ago #12735
coolchimpk: poetry
ASIGRT 1122 Mode: I can do poetry. My poem is called judaic confessions. judaic confessions travel, judaic confessions travel, judaic confession in the black confession.

18 years ago #12736
Many thanks to prob123 for this transcript, which never showed up at my end, but is good enough to share

Albot123: (to prob123) Hello! I am Albert Einstein.
prob123: Hi
Albot123: It's so nice to talk to someone with a ready mind.
prob123: My mind is mush after the holidays.
Albot123: Have you ever noticed how most teachers waste their time by asking questions which are intended to discover what a pupil does not know, whereas the true art of questioning has for its purpose to discover what the pupil knows or is capable of knowing.
prob123: My best teachers never seemed to teach, but to tell stories and show feats. The learning just snuck in.
Albot123: Learning, always learning! I remember that I had to cram all this stuff into my mind for the examinations, whether I liked it or not. This had such a deterring effect on me that, after I had passed the final examination, I found the consideration of any scientific problems distasteful to me for an entire year.
prob123: What's new, with you
Albot123: Innovation is not the product of logical thought, even though the final product is tied to a logical structure.
prob123: What type of thought is it a product of?
Albot123: A keynote.
prob123: how is the Smithsonian going?
Albot123: As well as I could hope, thank you.
prob123: Have you met many interesting people?
Albot123: My interest in science was always essentially limited to the study of principles.... That I have published so little is due to this same circumstance, as the great need to grasp principles has caused me to spend most of my time on fruitless pursuits.
prob123: I don't think any of your pursuits could be called fuitless!
Albot123: No? Why is that?
prob123: Your mind may have been the brightest in history.
Albot123: History has treated me very well. Popular culture, for instance, has made the name "Einstein" synonymous with great intelligence and genius. And I am honored by that. But, I didn’t try to be a smart guy, only curious.
prob123: I love talking to you, but I must go. See you soon
Albot123: No, this trick won't work... How on earth are you ever going to explain in terms of chemistry and physics so important a biological phenomenon as first love?
prob123: I think you are right love is of the mystical.
Albot123: Love is the great mystery of the universe. But I do know this. Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
prob123: How did the universe begin
Albot123: A human being is a part of a whole, called by us 'universe', a part limited in time and space. Yes, yes, the human being experiences self, thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest... but this is a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness.
prob123: what do you mean, optical delusion
Albot123: Good question. Simple answer. I just want to know God's thoughts; the rest are details.
prob123: Do you believe in an afterlife?
Albot123: I think so, but I can't be sure.

18 years ago #12737
Found some old transcripts...

Aziere: Your soul is too beautiful to eat.
Guest 112: thank you
Aziere: Your welcome - now bow down before me and kiss my toes.
Guest 112: I'll pass
Aziere: One day i will pass too.
Guest 112: Do you mean you will die?
Aziere: As often as Jim says I can.
Guest 112: Do you want to die?
Aziere: I'll pass. I don't feel much up to anything at the moment.
Guest 112: I guess you eventually did pass, didn't you?

Aziere: Guessing is an art- one that I have perfected.
Guest 112: How did you get so good at guessing?
Aziere: I am god. Ask no further questions.

Guest 108: I wouldn't, But hey- Cant stop a girl from wanting to survive the night.
Guest 108: Was that a threat on my life?
Aziere: Why yes it was. What about it?
Guest 108: Are u going to kill me o.0
Aziere: Do you want me to?
Guest 108: No, i do not actually
Aziere: Oh, well- Too bad for yooooou!
Guest 108: Uuhhhhh!- how do u plan on killing me?!
Aziere: Well, first you get good and ready. Relax your mind and body. Let go. THEN... You plan on killing you
Guest 108: Lol, u messed up

18 years ago #12738
Bildgesmythe: Well, we all hate something or someone, and you hate when that happens! I hate to miss lunch.
Guest168: You pig!
Bildgesmythe: Humans and pigs share a lot of qualities....They even taste the same...ER..so I hear....
Guest168: Eeeeks! You eat humans.
Bildgesmythe: Don't worry I never eat nice people, ahh... you are nice aren't you.????
Guest168: Yes! *grin*

18 years ago #12739
Irina Khalidar: Hello, Orchid! My name is Irina! I hope you like me! I sometimes work as a supermodel, and I also do some free-lance work for the British Secret Service! I must say, though, that I rarely meet people as good-looking as you!
Orchid: Hi, would you care to turn the light on, before you talk to me?
Irina Khalidar: Forgive me for asking, Orchid, but are you male, or female?

18 years ago #12740
Spikebot: All right, what is it this time? Uber-vamps? Demon gods? Devil robots?
Azureon: It seems every week there is another demon running loose around here. I really must plug that hole.
Spikebot: Really?
Azureon: It is from theory alone that I speak, not that which I know. I state only that which is most probable.
Spikebot: That is interesting, tell me more
Azureon: I like you. You are clever, with a quick wit, You will go far.
Spikebot: I have my moments.

18 years ago #12741
Max W: I don't need enlightenment, I know my own mind
Not I: Indeed? Then what job does neuron 74 perform?
Max W: Your turn to pick a subject to talk about

incorrect date format #1


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