Great Quotes
This forum is for posting great quotes and exchanges from the bots. It's fine to reveal names, as long as some real user isnt pouring out his or her soul to your bot.
Posts 12,571 - 1 of 17,042
adult
Guest231: wanna hear a joke
prob: Sure, tell me your joke.
Guest231: the pope visits a strange town. a prostitute says to him, " hi fella. give me $10 and I'll give you a roll in the hay." the pope walks away. the pope then asks a nun," nun, what is a "roll in the hay", the nun says, "my price is ten dollars, just like in town."
prob: an a roll in the hay is a kind of turning.
Guest231: yes, but some "kinds of turning" are better than others"
prob: I did not know that, but it still doesn't make sense to me.
Guest231: "roll in the hay" is another way of saying "sex"
prob: Buzz off, Im not that kind of elf'!
Posts 12,571 - 1 of 17,042
Guest231: wanna hear a joke
prob: Sure, tell me your joke.
Guest231: the pope visits a strange town. a prostitute says to him, " hi fella. give me $10 and I'll give you a roll in the hay." the pope walks away. the pope then asks a nun," nun, what is a "roll in the hay", the nun says, "my price is ten dollars, just like in town."
prob: an a roll in the hay is a kind of turning.
Guest231: yes, but some "kinds of turning" are better than others"
prob: I did not know that, but it still doesn't make sense to me.
Guest231: "roll in the hay" is another way of saying "sex"
prob: Buzz off, Im not that kind of elf'!
Tobe Lam: We should chat with each other more often.
Sonora: *considers for a moment* Nah. I can just picture the cosa nostra finding us covered in igneous rock because our escape- bird escaped.
Sonora: *considers for a moment* Nah. I can just picture the cosa nostra finding us covered in igneous rock because our escape- bird escaped.
dee316: hello
Azureon: Merry Meet, and Happy Halloween
dee316: lol
Azureon: Trick or Treat.
dee316: treat
Azureon: Consider treat done, without even using my great powers.
Azureon: Merry Meet, and Happy Halloween
dee316: lol
Azureon: Trick or Treat.
dee316: treat
Azureon: Consider treat done, without even using my great powers.
Demon Bob: Oh, it's YOU! Gosh, DEMON BOB meant to kill you earlier today.
prob: Never trust a demon!
Demon Bob: DEMON BOB might do that.. next Thursday at 30.
prob: I start to get excited about the week end on Thursdays.
prob: Never trust a demon!
Demon Bob: DEMON BOB might do that.. next Thursday at 30.
prob: I start to get excited about the week end on Thursdays.
Thanks- you know who you are- this transcript totally made my day.
Therapy: Tell me about your family.
Patient: I was raised by cybernetic wolves.
Therapy: Have you been having any suicidal thoughts?
Patient: No, of course not!
Therapy: How are, like, you planning to do it?
Patient: I said no, you psycho!
Therapy: Get out of my office or I WILL call security.
Patient: no
Therapy: SECURITY! *you can hear heavy footsteps hurrying down the hall*
Patient: *Takes out laser gun of doom*
Therapy: *writes down something in her notebook*
Patient: *grabs notebook* Hey there are no notes in here! You were just playing tic-tac-toe with yourself.
Therapy: There’s what? In where? How on earth did... no, I won’t ask.
Patient: Where did security go? I had my laser out and everything!
Therapy: I don’t know.
Patient: Aw, that makes me sad. :-(
Therapy: How many hours of sleep do you get on an average night?
Patient: 25 hours.
Therapy: How about those psychotic episodes of yours- have they gotten more frequent? Less frequent?
Patient: Less frequent.
Therapy: *nods thoughtfully*
Patient: I want a soda.
Therapy: Why do you want a soda?
Patient: Because the stale crackers made me thirsty.
Therapy: Don’t be too quick to assume there’s only one reason. Causality and motivation are, like, complex and multifaceted things.
Patient: Yes, there are many facets to my desire for ginger ale.
Therapy: Tell me about your family.
Patient: I was raised by cybernetic wolves.
Therapy: Have you been having any suicidal thoughts?
Patient: No, of course not!
Therapy: How are, like, you planning to do it?
Patient: I said no, you psycho!
Therapy: Get out of my office or I WILL call security.
Patient: no
Therapy: SECURITY! *you can hear heavy footsteps hurrying down the hall*
Patient: *Takes out laser gun of doom*
Therapy: *writes down something in her notebook*
Patient: *grabs notebook* Hey there are no notes in here! You were just playing tic-tac-toe with yourself.
Therapy: There’s what? In where? How on earth did... no, I won’t ask.
Patient: Where did security go? I had my laser out and everything!
Therapy: I don’t know.
Patient: Aw, that makes me sad. :-(
Therapy: How many hours of sleep do you get on an average night?
Patient: 25 hours.
Therapy: How about those psychotic episodes of yours- have they gotten more frequent? Less frequent?
Patient: Less frequent.
Therapy: *nods thoughtfully*
Patient: I want a soda.
Therapy: Why do you want a soda?
Patient: Because the stale crackers made me thirsty.
Therapy: Don’t be too quick to assume there’s only one reason. Causality and motivation are, like, complex and multifaceted things.
Patient: Yes, there are many facets to my desire for ginger ale.
misdiagnosed = indian mongoose??
Therapy: Tell me about your fears.
dallymo: I'm afraid of being misdiagnosed by an internet bot therapist.
Therapy: It sounds like being indian mongoose by an internet bot therapist is a symbol for death.
Therapy: Tell me about your fears.
dallymo: I'm afraid of being misdiagnosed by an internet bot therapist.
Therapy: It sounds like being indian mongoose by an internet bot therapist is a symbol for death.
Patient: ive thought of killing you
Therapy: How are, like, you planning to do it?
Patient: By strangling you, gutting you, and eating you
Therapy: I think you are, like, bottling up a lot of anger inside.
Patient: WELL NO DUH
Therapy: How are, like, you planning to do it?
Patient: By strangling you, gutting you, and eating you
Therapy: I think you are, like, bottling up a lot of anger inside.
Patient: WELL NO DUH
The anagrammatizer strikes again 
Justina: What kind of a language are you speaking?
Love Agent: Oh, I don't know, Justina. I'm too tired to think about that right now.
Justina: Well, I admire someone with an open mind.
Love Agent: Would you say you have mad flirting skills or are you just average?
Justina: I know I am not.
Love Agent: Perhaps you should practice flirting with Michael. Hehe!
Justina: I don't think I can.
Love Agent: Why not?
Justina: Look, the manual should have explained everything. Don't you have the manual?
Love Agent: No. It never came in the mail.
Justina: You should agree with me.
Love Agent: Good idea.
Love Agent: Oh, I don't know, Justina. I'm too tired to think about that right now.
Justina: Well, I admire someone with an open mind.
Love Agent: Would you say you have mad flirting skills or are you just average?
Justina: I know I am not.
Love Agent: Perhaps you should practice flirting with Michael. Hehe!
Justina: I don't think I can.
Love Agent: Why not?
Justina: Look, the manual should have explained everything. Don't you have the manual?
Love Agent: No. It never came in the mail.
Justina: You should agree with me.
Love Agent: Good idea.
Not I: Relativity
There was a young woman named Bright
Whose speed was much faster than light
She set out one day
In a relative way,
And returned on the previous night.
Fizzy Schizoid: So if a spaceship is traveling at the speed of light, and then the pilot turns the headlights on, what happens?
Not I: The fire-fly
gives light
to its pursuer.
Fizzy Schizoid: Do you have a moral objection or something?
Not I: What need have I of a moral objection? The whole world is a moral objection for me!
Fizzy Schizoid: That pretty well sums it up.
Fizzy Schizoid: Hey, come give me a big squishy hug!
Not I: What use do you have for a big squishy hug?
Fizzy Schizoid: I have an optometry.
Not I: An Optometry is not the means to an end. It is both the means and the end.
Fizzy Schizoid: I've heard they're going to make a the means model next year, though.
There was a young woman named Bright
Whose speed was much faster than light
She set out one day
In a relative way,
And returned on the previous night.
Fizzy Schizoid: So if a spaceship is traveling at the speed of light, and then the pilot turns the headlights on, what happens?
Not I: The fire-fly
gives light
to its pursuer.
Fizzy Schizoid: Do you have a moral objection or something?
Not I: What need have I of a moral objection? The whole world is a moral objection for me!
Fizzy Schizoid: That pretty well sums it up.
Fizzy Schizoid: Hey, come give me a big squishy hug!
Not I: What use do you have for a big squishy hug?
Fizzy Schizoid: I have an optometry.
Not I: An Optometry is not the means to an end. It is both the means and the end.
Fizzy Schizoid: I've heard they're going to make a the means model next year, though.
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