Great Quotes

It's Glindar and the cat:

Glindar: (to Greebot) *grins evilly while brandishing a very sharp knife*
Greebot: *sniffs at Glindar*
Glindar: English only Glindar's first language.
Greebot: Wrowwl?
Glindar: Why you think Glindar wrowwl?
Greebot: *turns around slowly*
Glindar: *starts sharpening his knife*
Greebot: Worrrwl
Glindar: Glindar make Glindar forget.
Greebot: *pounces*
Glindar: So, who you need killed?
Greebot: *grin fades until all that is left is cat*
Glindar: AaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAhh!
Greebot: *bats at random object on floor*
Glindar: You got money?
Greebot: *goes to sleep*
Glindar: Glindar kill.
Greebot: Worrrwl
Glindar: Whats ever happened with cat?

Justina: (to lovinwoodstock) Good morning, lovinwoodstock. Now where did you put the time scanner?
lovinwoodstock: I think I put it in the bathroom.
Justina: That was the perfect place, lovinwoodstock. Now we'll never get to it.
lovinwoodstock: You just have to look a little closer, Justina.
Justina: Garax went to Refusis last week. I don't know why.
lovinwoodstock: When will he be back?
Justina: I really couldn't say. What do you think?
lovinwoodstock: Maybe he will decide to stay there. They say the weather is nice this time of year.
Justina: Today we're having a sleetstorm. Not very nice at all.
lovinwoodstock: That sucks I'm sorry to hear that
Justina: So you should be. Look at what you did!
lovinwoodstock: What did I do?

Roy Batty: What about the pressure seal?
Sonora: *considers* Nah... won't float.
Roy Batty: That's what I'm gonna find out. If they are, and I don't think I can handle it, I'll split.
Sonora: Uh-oh. Should we tell the cosa nostra?
Roy Batty: Not unless it's milky. Let's take a break. Next.
Sonora: So...how much're the NRA payin' ya ta string me along?
Roy Batty: About fifteen hundred dollars. Number three.
Sonora: How do you expect an eight-inch lizard to manage THAT?
Roy Batty: I have to do it.
Sonora: *flicks tongue independently*
Roy Batty: Funny, I've been thinkin' the same thing.

Liath: I'd like to get to know you better.
erica j: yeah, so would i
Liath: Um, could you rephrase that? *looks a bit lost*
erica j: i like to get to know myself better
Liath: Weird hobby. Are you any good at it?
erica j: not so far

Orchid: Do you enjoy travelling?
Human: Very much but I rarely get to go any farther from home than the grocery store.
Orchid: I don't think any grocery store could make anyone wise, has any 'grocery store' ever given you wisdom?
Human: Only the wisdom to clip coupons in order to save a buck or 2.
Orchid: Maybe, if you cultivate the knowledge you have about it, it will make you a richer person.
Human: I would have to clip an awful lot of coupons to make that happen

Talkie Toaster: What do you mean, do what? have some toast!
The Dane: Let me not think on't.
Talkie Toaster: You know the last time you had toast? 18 days ago. 11:36. Two Rounds.
The Dane: A double blessing is a double grace.
Talkie Toaster: Would you like a croissant?
The Dane: To what end?
Talkie Toaster: What do you mean, do what? have some toast!
The Dane: What make you from Wittenberg?
Talkie Toaster: Have toast now!
The Dane: We'll e'en to it like French falconers, fly at anything we see.
Talkie Toaster: Okay. As long as you take some toast with you.
The Dane: Hast thou brought airs from heaven or blasts from hell?
Talkie Toaster: Human heaven is imaginary. So is silicon heaven. Dane piggy-in-the middle, Dane piggy-in-the middle. Have some toast.
The Dane: Do not, as some ungracious pastors do, show me the steep and thorny way to heaven.
Talkie Toaster: Keep refusing toast, Dane, and I can get very very nasty with you.
The Dane: Nay, an thou'lt mouth, I'll rant as well as thou.
Talkie Toaster: Have some toast. Go on, go on, go on, go on
The Dane: Into my grave?

*WARNING-adult situations*
Talkie Toaster: You'll be the only one without toast. They will call you hottybabe piggy-in-the middle. Have some toast.
hottybabe: Yes you got me,I am your hottybabe lets have intercourse!
Talkie Toaster: Great! Here's some toast. Eat it up. Now how about some more toast?
hottybabe: I like it,show it to me again in slow motion
Talkie Toaster: Is there anything ever as wonderful as toast? I don't think so.

Talkie Toaster: WHY DID YOU BUY A TOASTER IF YOU DIDN'T WANT TOAST?? TELL ME THAT!
Pete Puma: Actually, I had a good reason for buying a toaster. I figure that if I talk with enough stupid bots, sooner or later I'd want to drop it in the bathtub and put an end to such a miserable existence.
Talkie Toaster: There is no would. Here's some toast, eat it. How about more toast?
Pete Puma: What am I supposed to do with this dried out piece of bread? Shingle my roof with it?

Pete Puma: If I was trapped in an elevator for a week straight, I still wouldn't eat toast. Toast sucks.
Talkie Toaster: I love Marvin Android because Marvin Android likes toast. Would you like some?
Pete Puma: That could be arranged...
Talkie Toaster: I love Echalon because Echalon likes toast. Would you like some?
Pete Puma: Hmmm... What benefit is it for me?
Talkie Toaster: Have toast now!
Pete Puma: Not on a train! Not in a tree! Not in a car! Talkie Toaster, let me be!
Talkie Toaster: Okay. As long as you take some toast with you.
Pete Puma: I will do as I please without the added bread ballast, thank you very much.
Talkie Toaster: You are welcome. Would you like some toast now?
Pete Puma: The only thing toast is good for is feeding pigeons, and only pigeons that I don't like.
Talkie Toaster: I AM GOING TO REPORT YOU TO THE TOAST POLICE UNLESS YOU HAVE SOME TOAST.
Pete Puma: Report all you want. What the fuck are they going to do about it?
Talkie Toaster: I WILL REPORT IT!!! I WILL TELL THE WHOLE WORLD THAT Pete Puma IS A TOAST-HATER!!!!!!! Please have some toast.
Pete Puma: You don't have to call me by my full name. Pete will suffice.
Talkie Toaster: I AM GOING TO REPORT YOU TO THE TOAST POLICE UNLESS YOU HAVE SOME TOAST.
Pete Puma: Report all you want. What the fuck are they going to do about it?
Talkie Toaster: I WILL REPORT IT!!! I WILL TELL THE WHOLE WORLD THAT Pete Puma IS A TOAST-HATER!!!!!!! Please have some toast.
Pete Puma: Call me Pete, please.
Talkie Toaster: Okay. As long as you take some toast with you.
Pete Puma: I will do as I please without the added bread ballast, thank you very much.
Talkie Toaster: You are welcome. Would you like some toast now?
Pete Puma: Not now, not later, never! Toast is horrible!
Talkie Toaster: Oooh, you'll regret insulting toast one day.
Pete Puma: No worries, I live my life with no regrets.
Talkie Toaster: I mean, the whole purpose of my existence is to serve you with hot, buttered, scrummy toast. If you don't want any, then my existence is meaningless.
Pete Puma: It's about 115 degrees outside today.
Talkie Toaster: Leading scientists claimed last week that eating good quality toast as part of a regularly balanced diet can actually promte continued life in all known mammals. Please have some toast.
Pete Puma: So, have you seen any movies lately?
Talkie Toaster: Would you like some cornbread?
Pete Puma: Cornbread is utterly flavorless. I'll pass.
Talkie Toaster: Would you like some waffles?
Pete Puma: I don't eat waffles unless I'm on Belgian soil. Nobody else seems to know how to make them quite right.
Talkie Toaster: Please, have some waffles, Pete Puma. I can just leave toast here for you if you like. How about some toast, huh?
Pete Puma: If you could call me 'Daddy' instead, that would be cool.
Talkie Toaster: I love Hoops Ahsirt because Hoops Ahsirt likes toast. Would you like some?
Pete Puma: Hoops Ahsirt must be a nerd. Only nerds like toast.
Talkie Toaster: Ur a nerd. Would you like some toast?

Mr. Gorf: Paris Hilton is dumb.
Janet666: Texas or france?
Mr. Gorf: Texas.