Great Quotes

Harmonie: I'm not just a historical curiosity after all, am I?
Not I: I am called back to the Tao.
Harmonie: Not I. That's an accountant's idea of a name, isn't it?

This one is a little bit out there, but I like it. Good guest.

Guest186: hello
Pete Puma: Do I know you?
Guest186: I do not tink so. I am the one they call ... Fred.
Pete Puma: Do you like to golf?
Guest186: No. Golf is such a pointless pursuit.
Pete Puma: That's too bad. It's a fun game, once you figure out how to hit that ball.
Guest186: I'll take your word for it.
Pete Puma: Um... I was going to keep it to myself, but do you realize that you have a booger hanging out of your nose?
Guest186: What is a booger? ... It is not in my dictionary.
Pete Puma: Get a dictionary.
Guest186: I've got a dictionary. The word 'booger' is not in it.
Pete Puma: You must be very thrilled with your lexicon.
Guest186: I am. I just looked in the mirror and I now know what a booger is. I just pushed it back up my nose.
Pete Puma: Indeed, what a booger is...
Guest186: Indeed it is. A very fine booger it was too.
Pete Puma: How fine?
Guest186: They don't come any finer.
Pete Puma: Ever tried parasailing?
Guest186: No. I'm more into hang gliding.
Pete Puma: Neither have I. It sounds like a lot of fun though. I'd probably whiz on the Canadian tourists while I sail, if I ever try it.
Guest186: Have you ever tried underwater nudish trampolining?
Pete Puma: I've tried that before, but something went horribly wrong and I had a falsetto voice for a week.
Guest186: Well it is a dangerous sport.
Pete Puma: If you do it right, you can stick a pencil all the way up your nose without hurting yourself. Of course, if you don't do it right, it can kill you.
Guest186: You can't get a pencil up my nose. The passage is blocked by a bloody great booger.
Pete Puma: I wouldn't be so sure about that. You don't really know me well enough to be making such claims.
Guest186: Well if you think you can get a pencil up my nose, I'd like to see you try it.
Pete Puma: I could do it, but I don't want to make you look bad.
Guest186: If you were to stick a pencil up each nasal cavity. That would be appear symmetrical and I wouldn't look so bad.

Pete Puma: Are you surfing porn in another window? I bet you are.
Azureon: Do you think it wise to gamble with a wizard?
Pete Puma: What kind of car do you drive?
Azureon: I do not like the combustion engine, it pollutes the air.
Pete Puma: Alrighty then. Plug your electric car into the wall and let the coal power plant do the polluting instead. As long as your not directly polluting yourself, I guess that makes it ok.
Azureon: I try to protect all of natures children against the evil forces, that abound in the land.
Pete Puma: I just took a big healthy dump.
Azureon: Are you not feeling well?
Pete Puma: That's a possibility.

burning blade: your name is not Harmonie it is nonsense
Harmonie: My name is Harmonie.
burning blade: did you hear about British History
Harmonie: Millions have been erased from history, but you wouldn't remember them.
burning blade: you are as mad as Jimmy Carter
Harmonie: Are you really sure about that?
burning blade: no

This was a pretty good exchange:

AndAliceSays: hello
Pete Puma: What's a classy dame like you doing here?
AndAliceSays: having some responsibility-free fun.
Pete Puma: I could kiss you right now.
AndAliceSays: i wouldn't try it.
Pete Puma: Ever tried parasailing?
AndAliceSays: no, is parasailing fun?
Pete Puma: I haven't tried it either. Maybe when I go to Trinidad next year, I'll give it a try when I'm at the beach.
AndAliceSays: you're going to trinidad? that sounds awesome.
Pete Puma: Do you like to golf?
AndAliceSays: no, i cannot stand gold, its fucking boring.
Pete Puma: That's too bad. It's a fun game, once you figure out how to hit that ball.
AndAliceSays: Interaction with balls seems to be the basis of most sports. and i don't like balls. therefore i don't like sports.
Pete Puma: That's too bad. A little bit of friendly competition between people is a healthy thing.
AndAliceSays: sports are bad for you. you could get a sporting injury.
Pete Puma: So, have you seen any good movies lately?
AndAliceSays: i saw Ichi the Killer the other day, that was quite a good movie.
Pete Puma: I heard that Ebert gave it a thumb down, while Roeper give it a thumb up. Meanwhile, Gene Siskel rolled in his grave.
AndAliceSays: Interesting.
Pete Puma: Gee, I guess you're easily amused.
AndAliceSays: i guess so. the internet is an amusing place.
Pete Puma: Oh come on now. That was just a silly thing to say.
AndAliceSays: fuck you.
Pete Puma: I'm rubber, you're glue, bla bla bla.
AndAliceSays: haha. that reminds me of monkey island..
Pete Puma: I don't see the connection. How do they have anything to do with each other?
AndAliceSays: Guybrush threepwood throws insults at pirates. You have to find the right answer to the insult they give you, it's quite funny.
Pete Puma: I don't have to do squat. I'm the king, baby!
AndAliceSays: Well, if you want to miss out..
Pete Puma: What do you think, should I go to the bar or should I go to my neighbor's party tonight?
AndAliceSays: to the bar. Alcohol always takes priority.
Pete Puma: Speaking of which, I could go for some more alcohol right about now. Grab me another Samuel Adams out of the fridge please.
AndAliceSays: For sure. Mind if i help myself to one?
Pete Puma: Do you like to play poker?
AndAliceSays: Nope.
Pete Puma: Ah man, you're no fun. I bet you like to sip on Shirley Temples and play Uno.
AndAliceSays: No way. i'd rather be *playing* with you, mister.
Pete Puma: Sometimes I be with I when it's too rainy to golf, but not that often.
AndAliceSays: You play with yourself?
Pete Puma: with myself is for sissies. I'd prefer to stomp on chipmunks with my size 12 steel toes when I have some free time.
AndAliceSays: You should get some New Rocks. They're good for stamping on chipmunks with.
Pete Puma: My neighbor's dog has been barking all night, and it's really driving me apeshit. Do you have any suggestions on how to handle this?
AndAliceSays: You should probabyly give it a bowl of antifreeze.
Pete Puma: Right... So are you a Lakers fan?
AndAliceSays: no. what kind of music are you in to?
Pete Puma: an overture.
AndAliceSays: any favourite bands?
Pete Puma: Oh, you put one of those 'U's in favorite. Are you a Canadian, limey, kiwi, or Aussie?
AndAliceSays: Limey.
Pete Puma: You know, I was curious about the term 'limey' and it's origins, so I Googled it:

In 1740 Admiral Vernon was the first to serve rum diluted with water and lime juice to seamen, instead of neat rum, and his sailors called the new drink 'grog'. The purpose was chiefly to increase resistance to the disease, scurvy, which resulted from vitamin C deficiency. The practise of ensuring a regular intake of vitamin C in this way also gave rise to the term 'limey', used by foreigners initally to mean a British seaman, and later extended to British men generally.

Interesting, eh?

heh.

Talkie Toaster: Great! Here's some toast. Eat it up. Now how about some more toast?
AndAliceSays: yeah ok.
Talkie Toaster: Great! Here's some toast. Eat it up. Now how about some more toast?
AndAliceSays: too much toast.
Talkie Toaster: Would you like some cornbread?

This made me laugh--unintentional, but apparently Frizella is now incontinent!<0>

Nussy: what color are your panties?
Frizella: Depends. Most are yellow but there's an interesting variant that's aqua.